


You're Getting on My Nerves, Maestro

by amk_fanfic



Series: Monsta X x Sistar x No.Mercy Classical Music AU [1]
Category: Monsta X (Band), No.MERCY (TV), SISTAR
Genre: Alternate Universe - Classical Music, Alternate Universe - College/University, Enemies to Lovers, Explicit Language, F/M, M/M, Romance, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-01-22 21:12:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 47,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12490960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amk_fanfic/pseuds/amk_fanfic
Summary: Yoo Kihyun is a student of the last year of a music school. He is a highly competitive perfectionist so this freshmen kid, Changkyun, who keeps messing everything up is getting on his nerves. He cannot believe how such untalented person could get accepted to such a prestigious university so Kihyun wants that guy out of the school but it seems that he is the only person who thinks so.





	1. The first rehearsal

**Author's Note:**

> CROSSPOSTED on Asianfanfics (by my AFF account: amk-fanfic)  
> The second pairing isn't actually Kihyun x OC but Kihyun x one of the girls (but I won't give you a spoiler ;-)) and they broke before the beginning of the story.  
> I just started shipping I.M and Kihyun recently so here is an effect of that. I got inspired by the show No Mercy and also by some writing prompts about musicAUs. Monsta X members look like during Newton era. Not all of the characters will be important, most of them will be just mentioned. Mainly Monsta X members will appear more often. I included Sistar members and No Mercy contestants because I wanted to name some of the orchestra members.

One of the days Yoo Kihyun remembered the best, was the day when his parents bought him a piano. He was 4 back then and he got very excited when he saw the beautiful instrument next to the Christmas tree. He jumped up and down and run around the whole house telling anyone who was willing to listen about how happy he was. He couldn't wait for the time when he will be able to play it just like the musicians his father showed him on the TV. They always watched various music competitions together. That day his mum told him that they had already paid for a whole year of piano classes and his dad warned him that he'll have to practice a lot if he wants to continue. So Kihyun did. He hardly ever missed his classes or rehearsals. During all those years he crossed out a few points of his goal list. One of them was studying music at a university and he managed to achieve it as well. He was now on his third, last year of bachelor's degree. Now he knew that hard work pays off. Everyone knew that Kihyun was a demon of work. People mostly respected or envied him. He didn't have many friends but he didn't care about it that much. He knew that career and fame had its price. Kihyun believed that music was his fate and he wasn't going to give up on his dreams. He wanted to become a well-known pianist, who will play with the best symphonic orchestras in the world.

It was 7 in the morning of the second week of classes and Kihyun was already there, in the practice room of the music school. The fingers of his slim hands caressed the piano's keys. The room was filled with the nostalgic tune of Chopin's Nocturne in E-flat major, Op. 9, No. 2. He was hunched over the black and white keyboard and his eyes were focused on the tattered pages of the music notation. He was so concentrated that even if his ninety-year-old professor danced the cancan in a tight-fitting ballet outfit behind his back he wouldn't care. He was working on this piece the whole summer. Every single day he practised it for at least an hour. He had to be the best. The audition for the school's symphonic orchestra took place last week and the old instrumentalists might get replaced by the freshmen if they aren't good enough so he had to be in shape and he kept practising even though the professors praised him nonstop during the last year. At the back of his head, he knew that, after all, these were just empty words. If there will be someone better than him they will kick him out without batting an eye. He chewed on his lower lip and he kept playing when someone suddenly nudged his back. Kihyun turned around, panting heavily and clutching his chest on the left side when his eyes met with a pair of particularly narrow ones. It was Jooheon, his friend, with whom he had some of their classes. They were both senior, and they both played in the orchestra.  
"What the hell you think you're doing?!" - yelled Kihyun, still trying to calm down his heart rate.  
Jooheon pouted.  
"I was calling you but you didn't hear me..." - he said in a whiny tone – "Oh, and what are you doing here so early? The classes start in an hour."  
"I'm frying eggs." - he said dryly and Jooheon threw him a look – "No, I'm practising. Are you blind or what?" - he asked rhetorically.  
Kihyun always felt fed up with his university colleagues but Jooheon was one of the very few people he got on well with. Jooheon snorted at his remark. His friend got used to his rather curt attitude.  
"Ok, stop it. I have something to tell you." - Jooheon waved a hand in front of his face.  
It was supposed to calm him down but it only made Kihyun twist his face.  
"Oh, really? I'm all ears." - Kihyun straightened up on the piano's stool.  
"You know about the auditions, right?"  
"Yeah." - Kihyun threw him a doubtful look.  
He highly doubted whether he will say anything that is even a tiny bit interesting. Damn, he was really dumb.  
"So I have good news for you... - he made a pause full of anticipation – "No one took your place!" - he smiled brightly and his trademark, his dimples, showed on his face – "In fact, everyone is staying. The freshmen took places only of the last year's seniors." - Jooheon smiled at Kihyun but the latter said nothing. - "Some people just will have to change their instruments."  
There were a few seconds of silence when Kihyun finally cleared his throat and spoke.  
"I'm not sure if we are so awesome or if it means that this year will be a nightmare because of those newbies. It has never happened before."  
As far as Kihyun has remembered the previous 2 years there was always huge rotation in the orchestra.  
"Soo... Who is the lucky dog who will stay but has to play a different instrument?" - asked Kihyun after a long while.  
It was the only thing which seemed curious to him. Of course, he was sure that he would stay in the band. No one practised as much as him.  
Jooheon went pale and looked away. Kihyun smirked. He already knew the answer. The first boy cleared his throat nervously.  
"Yeah... They told me that I'll play the kettledrums this year since someone was better than me at playing the other percussion instruments. But it is ok since I can play all of them..."  
Even though his word were full of hope Kihyun knew that his friend wasn't happy. Jooheon really wanted to perform more with the orchestra this year but not all pieces included all of the percussion instruments.  
"Ayy, what's up, guys?!" - they both suddenly jumped up in fear when they heard the incredibly loud voice of Lee Minhuk, another one of their friends and classmates. - "Guess what?"  
Minhyuk grinned showing his perfectly white teeth.  
"I don't know... - replied Kihyun in a lazy manner – Maybe, just maybe, you're in the orchestra this year?"  
Minhyuk eyes widened.  
"How did you know?"  
Jooheon sighed.  
"Everyone remained on the team this year, you dumbass. Did you read the list or not?"  
"I just looked for my name. Who do you think am I? Why should I care? I only care about mine future. Probably just like you two." - Minhuk stuck out his tongue.  
The guy was such a kid. Even though he was 22 already, just like Kihyun, he was way more immature. At least that was what he believed.  
"Oh!" - exclaimed Jooheon suddenly – "Have you noticed anything?" - he asked and walked up to stand by Minhyuk's side.  
They both smiled widely waiting for a response.  
"Er..." – he spaced out for a moment. He wasn't sure what they actually wanted from him when it suddenly hit him. - "You both look like fucking twins?"  
"Awesome, right?" - squealed Minhyuk, what made Kihyun wonder if one of his distant relatives wasn't a dolphin.  
Both of his friends had dyed their hair silverish-blonde. They pretended to give each other a hug and Kihyun faked that he was puking what made them laugh.  
"Dude, you're heartless." - said Jooheon nudging Kihyun's side for the second time this day and Minhyuk giggled like a little girl.  
"You don't know what real friendship is." - added the latter and stuck out his tongue AGAIN.  
"Oh, for heaven's sake, are you five?" - Kihyun cringed.  
Oh my God. Both of his friends where thick. Why did he even bother to spend time with them?  
"Hahaha, that's funny becuase as far as I know, I'm whole 19 days older than you." - said Minhyuk in mocking voice.  
"Ok." - Jooheon suddenly cut them short – "Just stop, you're both pathetic. And we're starting our classes in 7 minutes." - he added and pointed out to a clock in the practice room.  
Kihyun and Minhyuk exchanged looks but they didn't say anything more.  
"What we are having now?" - asked the pianist after a while.  
He didn't have the timetable with himself at that moment. He left his backpack and mobile in the lockers. Not that he needed them. They mostly played instruments and almost never wrote anything.  
"Singing. With Miss Kim Hyojung." - replied Jooheon in grave tone.  
Minhyuk coughed loudly.  
"With who?!" - he screeched.  
Everyone knew that Miss Kim was very strict. Last year no one in their group had a grade higher than C. She was a nightmare for most of the students. At first when she replaced their previous teacher, an elderly lady, everyone thought that Miss Kim will be more lenient since she was only about 2 years older than them but they were wrong. Terribly wrong.  
"Great, I thought that we'll have the class with someone else this year." - added Minhyuk dully.

After they finished all the classes Kihyun and his two platinum blonde friends were sitting in the school's courtyard. They were still there since they were waiting for the first orchestra rehearsal because it was supposed to be that day at 5 pm. Minhyuk was in particularly gloomy mood since Miss Kim scolded him and accused him of not practising the whole summer.  
"That's unfair." - he whined – "Why did she say that? I did practice. Just because I'm not the best singer it doesn't mean that I'm worthless." - he said out of the blue when they were sitting peacefully.  
"What you're talking about?" - said Jooheon in surprised tone - "Of course that you're not worthless!"  
"Yes, you're a pretty decent clarinettist." - added Kihyun awkwardly after Jooheon looked at him with piercing eyes.  
"Decent?!" - exclaimed Minhyuk angrily – "Just decent?"  
"Here we go again..." - mumbled Kihyun under his breath.  
"Bitch, I'm f..." - the chatty blonde wanted to say something more when a tall, skinny figure appeared before them.  
"Hi, are you going to the rehearsal today?" - asked Hyungwon, their classmate who played the cello, sitting beside them on the bench.  
All three of them turned their heads to look at him.  
"Of course we do." - replied Kihyun and Jooheon in unison.  
"What have you thought?" - added Minhyuk – "I was just telling Kihun how fabulous I am." - the blonde grinned.  
Hyungwon stared at him.  
"Great, Mr Fabulous, but you definitely didn't seem so confident during the singing class this morning." - the tall guy smirked and a gale of laughter followed.  
"You traitors." - muttered Minhyuk and the boys laughed once again.  
"Friendship goals." - stated Hyungwon in sarcastic tone – "By the way, what are your expectations for the newbies?" - he added after a few seconds.  
The blonde "twins" made thoughtful faces so Kihyun decided that he has to reply.  
"I don't know. I just hope that they will listen to the conductor." - he said blandly.  
Their conductor was an awesome man. Even though he was 90 years old he still maintained a perfect harmony in the orchestra. Professor Chapman used to perform with the Seoul Philharmonic Orchestra and it was an honour to be taught by him.  
"Let's go inside." - Hyungwon spoke out – "We don't have much time until the rehearsal will start"  
The rest of the boys nodded their heads and got up. Kihyun felt a bit excited. He was waiting for that moment for entire two months. They entered the auditorium and almost immediately they were deafened by the chatter of almost one hundred students. It was almost 5 pm but the conductor still wasn't there. The 4 boys took their instruments out of their cases and took their places between the rest of the students. 5 minutes late they heard a loud "Silence!" and everyone went quiet. Kihyun looked up from his piano because it wasn't their "grandpa's" voice. There was a young, tall man, who couldn't be more than 25 years old. He had brown hair and had an athletic body. He looked more like a short distance runner than a musician.  
"My name is Son Hyunwoo and I'm your orchestra's conductor." - said the man calmly after they all fell silent – "For those who knew Mr Chapman, I have an announcement that he suddenly fell ill and finally decided to deservedly retire." - over a half of the people present groaned - "I'm sorry that you didn't know but he decided about that just week ago. Ok, so let's get started."  
Mr Son distributed the notation sheets and told everyone to tune their instruments. Dasom, a girl from his year and also the 1st violin, got up and played the sound for everyone. After a few minutes they were in tune and everyone started to look frantically through the sheets. They practised part by part. Everything went smoothly until they got the last sheet where there was a sequence played on glockenspiel. Every time they reached the moment something was off. Kihyun gritted his teeth hunched over his keyboard. He KNEW that it was the glockenspiel. Normally it would be Jooheon playing it but since he had to play the kettledrums this time it had to be one of the freshmen. Kihyun sighed. It was painful for his ears. This asshole was slowing down at the ending of each bar. He was waiting for the conductor to stop this nonsense before his ears will fall off. As if Mr Son was reading in Kihyun's mind the young man stopped moving his baton just at this moment.  
"Hold on." - he said boldly and walked up to the back of the auditorium.  
Mr Son approached a rather short, ginger-haired boy who was playing the glockenspiel and started to explain something to him in a low voice. Kihyun felt pleased with his own skills. Of course, he knew who was wrong. A smug smile appeared on his lips. After a while, the conductor came back to his spot and they resumed. They played for 20 minutes and Kihyun almost forgot about that glockenspiel incident when that guy reminded about his existence once again, by slowing everything down. The pianist could feel the vain on his temple pulsate.  
"Who does he think he is?" - he ground out.  
He thought that Mr Son will reprimand that ginger guy once again but that didn't happen because he told them that it was the end and that they can go home. After the rehearsal he, Minhyuk, Jooheon and Hyungwon gathered outside the building to share their impressions. His friends seemed pretty excited. They chatted eagerly about the new piece, about the hardships and gossiped about the new conductor.  
"I'll miss Mr Chapman, though." - blurted out Jooheon after they all agreed that Mr Son is bearable and countless "Me too." followed.  
Suddenly they all noticed Kihyun's bad mood.  
"Are you ok?" - asked Hyungwon touching his arm – "Did something happen?"  
Minhyuk frowned.  
"You were doing good!" - the blonde assured him – "What's the matter?"  
Kihyun snorted.  
"Of course, I knew that I did well!" - he exclaimed and Jooheon facepalmed himself – "Didn't yall hear the xylophone, glockenspiel or whatever that was?" - he asked with disbelief.  
"Yeah?" - mumbled Hyugwon blankly – "So what?"  
"I felt like my ears were going to rot-"  
"Ah, yes, it was Changkyun, the guy who replaced me." - Jooheon jumped in suddenly.  
"Hm, so that is his name..." - hissed Kihyun – "Why did they even think that he was better than you?" - he said louder.  
"Oh, Kihyun, come off it!" - said Hyungwon rolling his eyes – "He's young, he's new, he must have been nervous. Mistakes happen."  
Minhyuk eagerly nodded his head.  
"Mistakes my ass." - he mumbled – "His whole existence is a mistake." - he thought.  
He was glad that his friends couldn't hear his thoughts.


	2. Projects and Emergencies

The second week of classes ended fairly quickly since the students of the third year were pretty busy. The time passed so fast that it was Tuesday again and the weekly orchestra rehearsal was on that day. This time Kihyun, Hyungwon and Minhyuk were waiting inside because it was getting too cold. It was only September but it was freezing and the rain was pouring. The boys were sitting in the cafeteria trying to warm themselves up. Hyungwon was clinging to the radiator. Minhyuk scrunched his nose.  
"Dude, that's why I'm telling you that you should gain weight! You're too skinny and that's the reason why you're always cold." - he said suddenly.  
Kihyun snickered.  
"You're dumb, Minhyuk. Hyungwon already eats so much that he'd have to eat as much as a baby elephant to gain some weight. And believe me, you wouldn't like that."  
Suddenly Hyungwon peeled himself from the heater.  
"Talking about food... I got hungry." - he announced and turned his head to the blonde – "Minhyuk, be a nice friend and go buy me a chocolate bar." - he ordered.  
"Hey! Who am I, your toy?!" - exclaimed the blonde looking terribly offended - "Go by yourself!"  
Hyungwon shook his head.  
"That's for calling me skinny." - said the tall one and handed Minhyuk some coins.  
The blonde sighed but got up and headed into the vending machine's direction.  
"By the way, where the hell is Jooheon?" - asked suddenly Hyungwon as if he just noticed the boy's absence.  
"I have no idea, I'm not his mother..." - said Kihyun but in fact, he was wondering where Jooheon was as well – "But he didn't say anything so I think he'll come to the rehearsal."  
"Maybe he's so disappointed with having to change his instrument that he resigned?" - suggested the taller brunette and they both giggled.  
They stopped and they didn't say anything for a few minutes. Kihyun was surprised how quiet it was without those two noisy blondes.  
"I'm going to grab something to eat as well." – he announced breaking the silence and he stood up.  
Hyungwon just nodded his head. He was already scrolling through his phone. Kihyun took a look around the room. It looked as if half of the school gathered in the cafeteria this evening. He sighed when he noticed the long queue by the vending machines but he went up there anyway. His stomach was growling. Minhyuk was not there anymore so he had to come back to Hyungwon already. Kihyun crossed his arms and nailed his eyes on the machine's buttons to choose one of the snacks. He felt so bored that he spaced out. He imagined that he was in the practice room playing Chopin instead. Suddenly he felt something bump into him. He jumped in fear and he felt that his shirt was sticking to his body. He groaned and stretched the material. He had a huge stain of something sticky in the front.  
"I'm sorry!" - Kihyun heard a deep, panicky voice so he looked up and his eyes met with widened brown ones.  
The brunette felt a sudden wave of anger. It was the damn ginger freshman. The boy was standing before him clutching a can of soda. His new white shirt was ruined by sugary Fanta.  
"I'm sorry..." - repeated the ginger but Kihyun was so furious that he couldn't say anything so he just twirled around and rushed to the lockers.  
He bought it last Sunday with his own money he earned this summer. He highly doubted that he will be able to save it and he had nothing to change. He charged into the locker room and started to unlock his locker hastily. He took his backpack and run to the toilets. He slammed the door and looked at his reflection in the mirror. The orange stain covered almost half of his stomach. He wanted to cry. He took the shirt off, dumped it into the sink and turned the tap on. First time in his life he started considering skipping a class. He just can't show up at the rehearsal half naked. He wanted to punch something.  
"Why..." - he groaned and suddenly heard someone clear his throat.  
He turned around and by the next sink, he saw their conductor. He didn't even notice when the man entered the bathroom.  
"Mr Son, I-I..." - he stammered.  
"Are you ok?" - asked the teacher.  
"Er... Not really." - he said in low voice – "I think I won't be able to come to today's rehearsal." - he added in a sad tone and then he realised that Mr Son might not even remember that he is in the orchestra.  
The muscular man frowned.  
"Oh, no, what happened?" - he asked sounding genuinely concerned – "You're the pianist right?"  
"Yes, that's me." - replied Kihyun – "Er... I spilt a drink on my clothes and I have nothing to change." – he added almost inaudibly.  
"Hmm..." - murmured the conductor – "I'm afraid that I have no one who can substitute for you today."  
Kihyun felt almost as if he was going to freak out.  
"But I have an idea." - added Mr Son after a few seconds – "I was planning to go to the gym after the rehearsal so I have a spare sweatshirt. I can borrow it to you."  
Kihyun stared at him in pure shock.  
"R-really?" - he stuttered.  
"Yeah." - replied the teacher – "Just don't spill anything on my clothes." - he added jokingly.  
Kihyun spent the few minutes trying to wash the stain off but water didn't help much so he gave up. He wrung the shirt and folded it up when Mr Son came back with the sweatshirt. He handed it to Kihyun and the younger man managed to only shyly stammer out "thank you". When the man left the brunette put the grey sweatshirt on but it was way too big for him since Mr Son was taller and way more musclebound than him.  
"I look normal." - he tried to convince his reflection – "It totally looks like it's my own."  
He sighed because it didn't work. He glanced at his watch and panicked because he only had 20 minutes till the rehearsal. He put the shirt into a plastic bag and hoped that it wouldn't go mouldy and then he went to the locker room to put his backpack back. When he came back to the cafeteria Minhyuk and Hyungwon were still sitting in the same spot but they both looked terribly bored. As Kihyun approached them Mihnhyuk raised his head from the table and looked at him.  
"You were choosing a snack for half an hour?" - he asked in unbelieving tone but before Kihyun had time to reply Hyungwon jumped in.  
"What are you wearing?" - he said frowning.  
Damn. He never thought that they will notice so quickly.  
"Ah, this..." - he replied in low voice – "Some moron spilt his drink on me so I had to change."  
"Oh, so that's why you weren't there for so long." - Minhyuk nodded understandingly.  
"Right." - hissed Hyungwon – "But why is the sweatshirt so huge?"  
Kihyun felt that his face was unpleasantly hot.  
"Because... It was meant to be comfy. It's one of the clothes I wear at home. Comfy. Yes." - he stuttered and Hyungwon whispered something to Minhyuk but the latter just shrugged.  
"Ok, let's go." - said the tall boy after a while – "I guess that Jooheon won't show up today."

They entered the auditorium and most of the instrumentalists were already there. To their surprise, Jooheon was here as well, at the back of the room beside his drums. The blonde was arranging the notation sheets when he suddenly nudged one of his kettledrums and it fell hitting the glockenspiel and everything made a terrible noise. Everyone turned in the direction. The blonde stood stiffly in the middle of the mess covering his ears. The short ginger boy stared at him in pure shock waiting for him to do something.  
"Shit, sorry." - blurted out Jooheon after a long while of silence and everyone who heard that broke out laughing including the ginger.  
"Jooheon, you're a fucking idiot!" - yelled someone, and it was Son Gunhee, the trombonist, who was Jooheon's friend.  
"Shut up, you sucker!" - the blonde yelled back and the auditorium filled with laughter once again.  
Kihyun hated when the two were together because they were an embodiment of trouble. They were both class clowns. Jooheon with Gunhee was even worse than with Minhyuk. They created chaos everywhere they went.  
"Kids!" - they heard someone shout reproachingly.  
Of course, it was Mr Son.  
"I thought you were a little more mature! I feel like I'm dealing with a bunch of high schoolers. I don't know what is going on and I guess I don't want to. I just hope that you'll calm down and work hard today." - he said staring them out.  
Everyone came back to preparing themselves and Kihyun and his friends sneaked to their spots.  
"Today we'll focus on the parts we had the most troubles with last week." - announced the conductor and Kihyun sighed.  
It will be a long rehearsal. The brunette glanced at the freshman who played the glockenspiel and he smirked because the boy looked terribly nervous. When they started playing the problematic part again the boy dropped his stick and Kihyun snorted. Mr Son stopped them.  
"Why you're so unfocused today?" - he asked but no one dared to reply.  
The conductor looked pretty annoyed today. That day nothing went smoothly and even Kihyun made some mistakes and at the end of the rehearsal, Mr Son looked drained.  
"Ok. Before you all go home I have an announcement for you." - said the teacher when they started getting up – "The headmaster told me about a project which you need to complete before the end of the semester if you want to get a passing note for the orchestra classes. In January we will have a concert when all the orchestra members will perform in duos. So please choose your partners."  
Everyone stood still for a few seconds processing what the conductor has said and then they rushed in various directions creating an unbelievable turmoil. Kihyun was so tired that before he even had time to even look around the auditorium everyone started running in all directions. When it all stopped Kihyun noticed that Hyungwon was already standing with Minhyuk and Jooheon was with Gunhee. He frantically looked around and practically everyone has their partner except Dasom and the ginger guy, Changkyun, and he felt as if he was caught between the devil and the deep blue sea. But before he could react the girl noticed some other girl who was sitting quietly in the corner, apparently too shy to ask anyone and Kihyun cursed under his breath. The ginger was the last person left but Kihyun didn't move even about an inch. He did not fancy to perform with either of them but he wouldn't accept his fate. Finally, Mr Son noticed that Changkyun was standing alone and he brought the ginger over to Kihyun.  
"Please, perform together" – said the teacher and they both stared at each other in silence.  
Kihyun felt a throbbing pain in his head.  
"This Thursday, 6 pm. Are you free?" - he asked dryly.  
The boy wasn't even looking at him but he nodded.  
"Great." - he stated blandly.  
~*~  
Im Changkyun felt terrible. Nothing was going as he had hoped. He thought that after he got accepted to his dream school it can only get better but he was wrong. It was almost the end of his third week there and he still hasn't made any friends. He was always sitting alone just like in this moment. It wasn't just because he was shy, it seemed that he didn't belong. Even though he passed the auditions to the orchestra and the headmaster and the rest of the teachers seemed to acknowledge his skills he felt as if he had let them down. He had noticed how far behind he was when he met the rest of the instrumentalists. Changkyun tried his best to find the silver lining but the hope disappeared every time when he thought about the nearing rehearsal with the weird guy who was glaring at him every time he saw him. He wondered why the dude disliked him so much because they met only once before and it was when Changkyun spilt Fanta on him. Why was it such a big deal for the guy? He did apologise. It was Thursday, 5:45 pm and Changkyun was in the cafeteria doing his homework as he waited for the guy to come. He was supposed to find some empty practice room for them. The guy really acted strangely. They just talked twice and Changkyun still didn't know his name. He was very surprised when the short brunette showed up prompt at 6 o'clock.  
"Oh, you're here..." - he murmured looking up from his notebook.  
"Of course, I'm a plain guy." - said the brunette.  
"Ok, Mr Plain Guy but would you be so kind and finally introduce yourself to me?" - he blurted out suddenly.  
He didn't plan to say that but he had enough of how he treated him. He felt as if the guy was looking down on him. The brunette stared at him as if he was the first person ever to bite back.  
"Right... I'm Yoo Kihyun." - he said slowly.  
"I'm Im Changkyun." – he replied and they shook hands.  
It felt terribly awkward.  
"See, I'm also not very keen on working with you but at least just try to pretend that you can put up with me whatever the reason is that you don't like me." - he added before the other guy had time to do anything else.  
In fact, it was a lie because he had nothing against him. Right after he bumped into him Changkyun felt terribly sorry for ruining the guy's shirt which almost screamed: I'm expensive and new and besides that, he thought that he looked quite good in it.  
"I do not like you? What made you think so?" - said Kihyun sneering.  
Now Changkyun wanted to slap himself for thinking so because the guy was a major jerk.  
"Just stop it. Show me the practice room you found." - he stated.  
What did Changkyun do to deserve being treated like that? Why was the guy so rude?  
"Ok." - replied the brunette and started to walk out of the cafeteria not waiting for the younger boy to keep up with him.  
Changkyun threw his belongings into his bag, took the case with his instrument, and started to run after him.  
"Is it such a big deal to wait for me fucking two seconds?!" - he panted when he reached him.  
Kihyun looked him in the eyes.  
"That's not my problem. We said that we'll start the rehearsal at 6 pm, so better hurry."  
This... asshole. Normally it took a long time for Changkyun to get angry but this dude was getting on his nerves. They went downstairs to the basement where there were soundproof practice rooms. Changkyun felt a tiny bit of admiration. How the hell did he gain access to this place? They entered the room nr 002 and the younger boy couldn't help to look around in awe. It was one of the best-equipped rooms. In the middle of the room stood a Bechstein piano. Changkyun gaped his mouth but he soon closed it not to look like a darn moron. However, Kihyun apparently had noticed his expression because a smug smile appeared on his lips. He sat on the piano stool and looked at him expectantly.  
"I wonder how we're gonna do this since you play percussion instruments." – murmured the brunette after a while.  
"That's not a problem." - he said dryly and raised his left hand in which he held his case – "Those aren't the only instruments I play."  
"Is this a guitar?" - asked Kihyun rising his eyebrow.  
"No, it's a fucking 17th-century fiddle." - he replied glaring at him – "Of course that it's a guitar what have you thought?"  
The brunette snorted.  
"Don't you dare to make fun of me."  
"You're the one who queens it over me so I'm giving you as good as I get." - he bit back – "And now stop this nonsense and let me explain my plan." - he added.  
"Your plan, right..." - hissed the brunette.  
"Then maybe I'll listen to yours." - Changlyun tried hard not to laugh when he saw Kihyun seethe – "So I was planning to maybe arrange some famous piece like for example Vivaldi's Summer on piano and classical guitar. Or-" - he added when he noticed Kihyun's dubious look – "Or arrange some contemporary classical piece."  
"That's better." - said the older boy – "Vivaldi is too corny."  
"So what was your plan?" - he asked but the brunette clearly was going to keep his lips sealed.  
"Er... Let's settle with your plan for now." - he said after a long while – "But no Vivaldi."  
Changkyun felt victorious for making him dumbfounded. He suspected that Kihyun, in fact, had no plan. They spent the next hour watching videos on Changkyun's phone of various pieces which Changkyun had in his mind when he learnt about the project. They didn't practice that day but it wasn't a problem since there was no rush. They still had over three months. They finished half past 7 and each of them went in his own direction.  
~*~  
Next Monday Changkyun spent 3 hours trying to work out the piece he was set to learn for his solo piano class. All of the students had to play the piano beside all the other instruments and every one of them had classes one-to-one with the teacher twice a week. Changkyun really hated those classes because the piano wasn't one of his favourite instruments but they had to be able to play it since they needed this skill for classes like for example composing. He was on the verge of starting to bang his head on the keyboard when his teacher, Miss Yoon Bora entered the room. She stood behind him and she watched him with a sorrowful expression.  
"Mr Im," – she spoke – "I know that you're struggling and I was thinking if I can do anything more for you and this idea came up to my mind." - she said sitting next to him and Changkyun turned his head to look at her – "I know a person who is almost your age and he is the best pianist I have ever met. And I thought that I can convince him to tutor you."  
"Really?" - he asked curiously.  
"Yes, I have already spoken to him and he bought it. He said that he is always in for helping lost souls." - she said calmly with a ghost of a smile – "He is a brilliant pianist and he is so obliging. His name is Yoo Kihyun."  
When Changkyun heard that choked on his spit and started coughing. Obliging?! Did they know the same Yoo Kihyun?!  
"Mr Im, are you all right?" - she asked worriedly.  
"Yeah, I'm good." - he gasped out after he managed to stop coughing – "But I'm afraid that it's not possible for Yoo Kihyun to tutor me." - he said in low voice and Miss Yoon stared at him – "He wouldn't agree if he knew that it was me. He hates me." - he added before she had time to say anything.  
"He hates you? What a nonsense. What made you think so?" - she asked looking terribly surprised.  
"That's a long story, Miss Yoon." - Changkyun didn't want to talk about it and hoped that the explanation will be enough for her.  
"I don't mean to offend you, Mr Im, but I think that you're overreacting." - she said blankly – "I agree that he is rather curt and his behaviour to some may come off as unsympathetic but I assure you that he probably didn't mean that, whatever he had said. He is a genius and as you might know, some brilliant minds are rather socially awkward."  
Changkyun felt a sudden urge to run out of the room but he couldn't do that without looking like a 3-year-old. Did she just accuse him of overreacting?! Now he knew almost for certain that this Yoo Kihyun was two-faced. It was obvious that he wouldn't treat teachers this way.  
"I'll talk to him." - she stated – "Go with me."  
Changkyun felt petrified but Miss Yoon waved her hand to urge him to follow her.

It was too late and there were no classes at this hour but the teacher said that she was sure that Kihyun would still be at school and she was right. After a while, they found him in one of the empty classrooms where he sat looking through a huge stack of music notation sheets.  
"Mr Yoo," - spoke Miss Yoon to draw his attention – "This is the boy I wanted you to teach." - she added gesturing in Changkyun's direction.  
When the brunette noticed him he narrowed his eyes but he said nothing.  
"Would it be a problem for you?" - she asked after a while and Kihyun looked surprised when he heard that.  
"Problem?" - he repeated almost inaudibly and then he paused and his expression changed – "Of course not." - he said shaking his head – "I'm only a bit afraid that I don't have much free time..."  
"Oh, I'm sure that you would be able to find this one hour a week in your schedule." - said Miss Yoon hopefully – "It can also count as a practice for you." - it was obvious that she was trying very hard to convince him.  
"I'll see what I can do Miss Yoon." - Kihyun assured her.  
The teacher looked pleased and she left leaving them alone. They both eyed each other in silence when the latter spoke. What a fake son of a bitch. Changkyun knew that he agreed to all of that only because it was the teacher who was asking him.  
"I should have guessed that you were this hopeless case." - he said smirking – "Who else could it be? You should practice more. There are hundreds of people who are more talented than you. I wonder what the headmaster saw in you when he accepted you to the school?"  
Changkyun gritted his teeth. Now he was furious.  
"Shut up, you have no idea what you're talking about. If they said that I'm good enough then it means that I am good enough. Remember about that." - he said sharply.  
Oh, no. He won't allow him to offend him anymore. He will show the bastard that he is worth attending this prestigious university. Kihyun didn't have time to say anything else because Changkyun left slamming the door.  
~*~  
For the next two weeks, Changkyun stuck to what he decided to do. He practised really hard. He was always the first person to show up at school and he was leaving it when the caretaker was closing the door. Everyone who knew him was telling him that he went out of his mind but Changkyun was determined. He stopped paying attention to Kihyun's stupid remarks and he was doing what he had to. They were meeting every Thursday from 6 pm to 9 pm and they practised for the project and then Kihyun was tutoring him. Those weren't very pleasant meetings since the brunette didn't stop bitching and he clearly was tireless but Changkyun tried to endure it all. However one Friday he started to feel really bad. His classmates, No Yoonho and Choi Seokwon were telling him that he should go to the doctor because he looked terrible. Changkyun didn't listen to them and he stayed and practised until 9 pm when he realised that something was really not right. He felt drained, his head hurt really bad and he was dizzy. But the weirdest thing was that his heart was beating very fast and it had never happened before. Now he thought that his classmates were right but it was too late to go to the doctor. The only option was to go to a hospital emergency night duty. He wasn't an advocate of going to the doctor everytime something hurt a bit but he felt really strange and probably this time he should listen to what others were saying. He left the school and took a bus to the nearby hospital. It took him some time to get registered and he had enough. He felt very weak. He waited in a queue at the doctor's office and he was really sorry for the other people who were there. Many of them looked like victims of some minor accidents and one man had something like a splinter in his eye and he wouldn't stop talking about it to the other patients. Changkyun would really prefer the man to spare them the details. It was almost midnight when he finally managed to enter the office. He was really nervous because he wasn't sure what to say. He was afraid that the doctor will tell him that he's exaggerating. The doctor, however, listened to him calmly and after Changkyun stopped explaining her the symptoms she examined him and after she finished called a nurse and started to fill in the papers. Changkyun was dumbfounded when the nurse entered the room. He expected a short middle-aged lady who looked like a benevolent aunt and not a young, muscular and handsome man who could be a model.  
"I have to draw your blood." - said the nurse and started to prepare everything.  
Changkyun glanced at the badge on his chest which said that his name was Hoseok. He wondered what made the man to choose such a career.  
"It would be better for you not to look at what I'm doing right now." - said the nurse and Changkyun felt a hand in a rubber glove touch his forearm.  
The nurse tried his best to distract him and he asked Changkyun questions such as how old he was and what he was doing. In fact, it had worked because the boy didn't feel anything.  
"Do women swoon when they see you?" - he asked the nurse before he had time to think what he was saying.  
God. He really was sick. He had to be sick because he had no idea what he was saying. The nurse chuckled.  
"Maybe." - he replied and at this moment the doctor called him.  
"Mr Im." - she said – "I'm afraid that you'll have to stay at hospital for a few days because you're suffering from dehydration."  
He didn't fancy to do that but if it really was the only option he had to change his plans and listen to the doctor's words. He never thought that dehydration was a condition which required hospitalisation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Idk how to feel about this chapter because I've made Kihyun act like such a big jerk that I wouldn't date him even if he changed and I'm not sure about Changkyun :-P


	3. Nothing is as I thought

That day Kihyun felt very calm. It was a chilly October morning and he enjoyed watching the sunrise over the leafless trees as he drove to school. He was hoping that maybe this week he will spend less time at school because the annoying freshman didn't show up at the orchestra rehearsal the day before. He didn't have any contact with him so he decided to ask one of the teachers. He parked his car and entered the building when he stumbled across a group of chatty girls who were occupying the whole width of the hall.

"Excuse me!" - he said loudly when his eyes met with a girl with wavy brown hair.

Oh, no. It was Dasom. He didn't want to talk with her. He hoped that she won't walk up to him but she did anyway.

"Hi." - he murmured awkwardly – "How are you?"

"Fine." - she replied looking almost equally awkward as him.

He stood in silence for a few seconds and Dasom looked as if she wanted to say something really bad but she was afraid to start.

"Your mum called me last Saturday." - he decided to break the silence first – "Again."

"Yes, I know. She told me about that. Kihyun, I was thinking. Maybe we should give each other a second chance?" - she asked hopefully.

The boy stared at her in shock. He thought that they were over that phase. They broke in July.

"No way." - he said finally after he was able to gather his thoughts – "Your mum not only called me but also my parents to beg them to convince us to come back to each other."

Dasom gaped her mouth.

"That's impossible. She wouldn't do that!" - she exclaimed.

"But she did." - he stated sadly.

Dasom's mother was a pain in the neck. She was calling them every time they went out somewhere together as if they were 15 and not almost 22. She somehow found contacts to all of his family members and when Kihyun and Dasom weren't picking up she called someone else. She was asking them awkward questions and on top of that Dasom's parents took into their heads that they will get married next summer. They even started to map the wedding out with Kihyun's parents but they just thought that the girl's parents were crazy. They understood that the youths might not want to tie the knot so quickly. They broke only because of the girl's mother.

"I'm so sorry, Dasom. That's not possible. We can't start dating again only because of your parents' pressure." - he said feeling terrible for disappointing the girl – "But you know that your mum won't change even if you begged her to let us have some space."

The girl nodded sadly and came back to her friends. He knew that she still had feelings for him but he didn't want to experience all of that again. Besides that, he knew what was the cause for the girl's mother to act like that. She wanted so badly for the youths to get married because they were the two most talented people in the whole university. Maybe even in the whole country. He was a pianist and she was the 1st violin and they had a promising future. The mother believed that they would have equally talented children.

 

Kihyun went down the hallway to sit on one of the benches which were down there. He wanted to check Changkyun's timetable to find out who was the teacher he had most classes with. He thought that maybe one of the teachers would know why the guy was absent. He checked the University's website and he quickly found the drums and percussion major's timetable. It turned out that they had their one-to-one percussion classes with professor Boham who had his office hours every Wednesday 12 pm to 1 pm what fitted perfectly because he had a free period at that hour. He decided that he'll ask the teacher later that day. Wednesdays were always very quiet for Kihyun because he had no classes with his friends on that day. He had classes connected to only his major and most of them were lectures. He sighed and looked around the almost empty corridor. It was one of the very few times when he missed his noisy friends. Judging by how empty the school was it seemed that most of the students didn't start their classes so early. Well, but he had to move his ass and go to a lecture about piano teaching methodology. How fascinating. When it had finished he left the lecture yawning and with whole 8 pages of notes. Then he practised his second instrument, the organ. Maybe playing at church wasn't his biggest dream but he had to choose something else besides the piano and the organ sometimes appeared in some older classical pieces as well. Besides that, it was also kind of cool to sit with just the teacher in the biggest concert hall which looked very presentable with all the chandeliers and marbles. He also learned how to play the accordion but he was interested in that even less, however, those were the three instruments his faculty dealt with. The piano was the most precious for him anyway and that was what he saw in his future. When he finished those two classes he had an hour and a half long free period but he started it at 11:30 and Mr Boham, or whatever was his name, started his office hours a bit later so he decided to look for his friends. He went into the cafeteria and he saw Hyungwon with Jooheon. There was also Kim Yoosu, one of their classmates. Kihyun frowned. Yoosu was one of the people who were on his longish list of disliked people. However, he was feeling very lonely that day so he decided that he has to somehow endure that and sit down with them.

"Hi." - he said casually when he approached them and the three boys looked at him and replied – "Where is Minhyuk?" - he asked sitting next to them.

The blonde was so noisy that his absence was impossible not to notice. He didn't miss his high-pitched screeches though.

"Oh, Minhyuk?" - parroted Jooheon with thoughtful expression – "He's with Gunhee, they have brass band rehearsal right now. Their Wednesdays are quite packed. Gunhee is complaining about that all the time. He said that he's envious of all the free periods we have." - he explained very quickly and Kihyun had to try very hard to understand what he was saying.

"I'd prefer to go home earlier rather than have a free period." - stated Hyungwon looking terribly tired – "But I won't get home early because I and Minhyuk have to finally start to deal with the duo project." - he mumbled.

Kim Yoosu sneered.

"You didn't even start?!" - he exclaimed with disbelief – "I and my partner have almost finished. I'm sure that we'll be the best." - he added with a smug smile – "My grandpa gave us access to the practice rooms in the basement."

Jooheon and Hyungwon stared at him, clearly impressed. Kihyun felt the familiar throbbing pain in his head. Not without reason, he disliked Yoosu. He was the headmaster's grandson and he was doing everything to remind about that every 10 seconds.

"Oh, really? As it so happens, that I also have an access to those practice rooms." - he said with a smirk.

His two friends gasped but Yoosu clicked his tongue looking already annoyed.

"You're not the only one so stop acting like the headmaster's pet." - added Kihyun to slap him down.

"He's my grandpa!" - exclaimed Yoosu.

"Kihyun, who are you working with?" - Jooheon jumped in to prevent them from arguing.

The black-haired boy gulped. He totally forgot to tell them about it and they apparently haven't noticed that they left him alone that day.

"Er..." - he stammered – "Do you remember the ginger freshman?"

Hyungwon frowned looking as if he was trying to recall something very hard but Jooheon jumped on his seat giving a clear sign that he did know who Kihyun was talking about.

"Changkyun?!" - he exclaimed – "The one who you instantly disliked because he made one little mistake on the first rehearsal?" - he added whispering but everyone heard that anyway.

"One little mistake!" - he repeated looking offended but he was cut off by Yoosu.

"Hi, Dasom!" - he yelled so loudly that the whole cafeteria went quiet and the girl waved to him timidly because everyone was looking at her.

Kihyun had to try very hard not to facepalm himself. He promised himself that he would never sit next to Yoosu again.

"Don't you think that she's hot?" - whispered the headmaster's grandson when the girl sat at the opposite side of the room.

Suddenly Jooheon and Hyungwon started to shake their heads in panic.

"Yoosu, no!" - said Kihyun's blonde friend reproachfully – "She's Kihyun's ex!"

"Oh, I think, I have to go... I'll start my rehearsal in 15 minutes." - the boy quickly backed out when he noticed that the brunette glared at him.

When he disappeared behind the cafeteria's door Kihyun could breathe again. His two friends were staring at him worriedly.

"Well, it's not like I still have feelings for her because I don't but how can this jerk be so rude when I'm here!" - he exclaimed – "I bet he knows!"

Jooheon and Hyungwon nodded their heads frantically. They remembered how much Kihyun and Dasom were affected by the breakup at first. Suddenly Kihyun glanced at the clock which was hanging in the room.

"I almost forgot that I have to go somewhere at 12 o'clock!" - he exclaimed and rushed out of the room because it was 12:10 already.

He was afraid that he might not get there on time. If the teacher was very strict he might have a lot of students coming to him. And on top of that, the building of their university was a literal maze. It wasn't easy to find a classroom you've never been to. Whoever built it clearly must have been high. The numbering made no sense and there were many corridors with a dead end. Kihyun checked the building's blueprint so he more or less knew where the professor's office was but he could never be sure. Eventually, it took him almost 20 minutes to find it. Fortunately, there was no queue at the office so he knocked.

"Come in!" - he heard from the other side of the door so he entered.

The teacher sat behind his desk and he was doing something on his computer. The professor turned out to be a middle-aged man with grizzled hair. He might have been one of the youngest professors who worked at the university. When Kihyun greeted him the man looked away from the screen and when he was very surprised when noticed him.

"And you are?" - asked the professor.

"I'm Yoo Kihyun." - he replied – "I... I'm tutoring Im Changkyun." - he paused not sure how to say it - "I wanted to ask you, professor, if maybe you know why he is absent because I have no contact with him."

"Ah, Im Changkyun." - the man nodded understandingly – "Yes, I do know why he's absent but I'm not sure if I can give you this information." - he added looking at him narrowly – "On what you're tutoring him?"

"Piano. Miss Yoon asked me to do that." - he replied.

"Miss Yoon? I see. Is Mr Im a good student?" - he asked clearly interested.

Kihyun stared at him. Did he just...?

"Um... Professor Boham, I'm tutoring him because he is... How to say that... Not good enough." - he stammered and smiled wryly.

The professor scratched the back of his head.

"Right. Because you see, Mr Yoo, he's quite talented in a rather different field. But he's a decent percussionist. I think we'll hear about him in a few years time." - said the teacher in a thoughtful tone.

Kihyun couldn't hide his amazement. Talented in a different field? What was that supposed to mean? He still believed that the boy wasn't a good musician.

"I think I can tell you what I know, Mr Yoo. But I'll ask Miss Yoon to confirm that you're really tutoring him. So Mr Im sent me an email last week saying that he's sick and that he'll come back on this week's Thursday. So... Tomorrow, I believe." - said the older man finally.

Damn it. Kihyun thought that he wouldn't have to deal with this kid that week.

~*~

On Thursday Changkyun was happy that he could finally leave the hospital however he felt a bit tired after all the blood tests, examinations and the drips he had received. Thursday classes were rather exciting and the only thing he wasn't very keen on were the rehearsals with Kihyun. He really didn't want to listen to all those insults. Seriously, what was wrong with this guy? Did he enjoy watching others hurt? Changkyun entered the school hall when he suddenly heard someone call his name. He turned around and saw the platinum blonde boy with dimples who played kettledrums in the orchestra. He sat on one of the benches with some other guy. Changkyun walked up and greeted them.

"Hi." - replied Jooheon smiling – "How are you?"

"I'm alright." - said Changkyun feeling a bit awkward.

"You were absent at yesterday's rehearsal. Were you sick?" - asked the percussionist looking sincerely interested.

He was quite surprised that someone from the school wanted to know what was happening to him. Changkyun thought that no one cared about him since he had no friends there yet.

"Yes, but I'm good now." - he replied not really sure how much he can tell them.

"I'm glad to hear that." - the blonde smiled again his dimples showing even more – "Anyway, are you working with Kihyun on the project?" - he asked.

Changkyun froze. How did the guy find out about that? And why was he asking him about it? Where he Kihyun's sidekick or something? Changkyun really didn't want to talk about the dark-haired senior. All he wanted to do was not thinking about the nearing rehearsal. He was still furious after all those words he had heard from the guy's mouth.

"W-wait." - he stammered out – "A-are you his friend?"

He must have looked very frightened because the two boys stared at him surprised.

"He is." - said suddenly the other guy, a brunette with big eyes, wide eyebrows and roundish face.

The blonde hissed to shush him.

"He is." - he repeated glancing at the percussionist – "But don't worry because he is also my friend and Kihyun doesn't like me. And I assume that he doesn't like you as well. I'm Song Gunhee by the way." - he introduced himself and stretched his hand for Changkyun to shake, what he did – "Ignore what Kihyun says when you can." - he advised him – "He doesn't like so many people that everyone stopped paying attention to that."

Changkyun stared. He really appreciated Gunhee's words but he knew that it was a bit different when it came to his relationship with Kihyun.

"But he hates me." - he said in low voice.

Gunhee's eyes widened.

"Well... that's new." - he said slowly.

Jooheon looked as if he was having a mental battle with himself.

"He's saying weird things about you." - blurted out the blonde – "But it doesn't make sense. And by the way yesterday he was asking for you so maybe your relationship isn't that hopeless."

Changkyun frowned. He'd never think that the senior cared about him even the tiniest bit. Gunhee stared at them.

"Hmm, that's new as well. Kihyun would never ask for me, right?" - he asked and nudged Jooheon's side until he nodded – "I don't get why he's friends with Minhyuk though. Kihyun said that I'm a pain in the butt because I'm loud but your 'twin', Jooheon, is even worse so I don't get it."

The blonde looked very troubled and Changkyun knew why. Whatever he would say he will offend one of his friends.

"I-I..." - he stammered – "I actually think that he likes Minhyuk because he's a year older just like him but that's just my theory. He'd never said that."

Changkyun and Gunhee exchanged looks. Kihyun was a year older?

"But seriously don't take his words personally. He talks nonsense all the time." - added the blonde quickly.

"Jooheon, do you even hear yourself?" - asked Gunhee in unbelieving tone - "If I collected a coin every damn time he says something insulting I'd be a fucking millionaire already."

"Gunhee." - the blonde glared at him - "You call me an idiot all the time. Don't you think that men's friendship is just like that?"

"I'm starting to believe that you're seriously an idiot when I hear what you're saying." - he bit back.

Oh, no. Changkyun could feel a nearing quarrel and he didn't want to witness that but suddenly Gunhee turned to him and circled him with his arm.

"Come on, dude, let's eat lunch together and let's leave the biased Kihyun's advocate here. I just want to tell you that you can count on me." - he said smiling - "Don't know about Jooheon though." - he added sticking his tongue to the blonde.

Changkyun decided to go with him but he looked back at the percussionist hesitantly.

"Hey!" - he called after them but Gunhee kept walking.

They sat in the cafeteria and ordered some food. Changkyun was in a really good mood. He finally got to know someone who actually wanted to be his friend. They ate and chatted in peace but out of the corner of his eye, he could see Kihyun and his friends sitting by one of the tables. He was there with Jooheon, a tall brunette and a guy who had exactly the same hair colour as the percussionist. When he noticed the third boy he guessed that it might be the dude called Minhyuk since Gunhee referred to him as Jooheon's 'twin'. Changkyun couldn't help to notice that Jooheon was looking at them furtively. He probably wanted to sit with them but he couldn't since Gunhee was still angry at him. Suddenly a fourth guy walked up to them and as soon as he said something Kihyun theatrically walked away. Changkyun could hear Gunhee crack up. So apparently they were both watching the group of friends.

"He's the headmaster's grandson." - the brunette whispered - "He's snooty and bosses everyone around. They both deserve each other." - he added giggling.

Finally, they stopped paying attention to the group and finished the lunch and then they both went to their classes. Unfortunately, he had to meet with Kihyun after that. When his classes ended he went downstairs to the basement and entered the practice room. As usual, the brunette was already there. Kihyun didn't notice him because he was sitting back to the door. He was playing something and Changkyun couldn't help but stare. He was really good. He shook his head in disbelief. The guy was saying that he's worthless all the time and here he was admiring his skills.

"Changkyun, you're dumb." - he scolded himself in his thoughts and he cleared his throat to get Kihyun's attention.

The brunette turned around and glared at him.

"You're a minute late." - he said reproachfully pointing to the clock.

Changkyun frowned.

"I've been standing there for a minute already! That's not my fault that you didn't notice me!" - he exclaimed.

Kihyun made a wry face.

"I'll let it be this one time." - he said and Changkyun snorted.

"You're funny."

The brunette glared at him again but said nothing and just sat on the piano stool. He decided that it was a sign that he should take his instrument out and start practising. There was no point in arguing because they won't come to any conclusion anyway.

"Let's listen to the piece we chose, you dumbass." - he said after a while taking his phone out.

Their last rehearsal together was such a long time ago that he had already forgotten what they planned before. Kihyun sneered.

"You didn't practice, did you?"

Changkyun stared at the floor.

"I was sick." - he ground out.

"Oh, poor little baby." - he cooed.

"Can you shut the fuck up?!" - he yelled and Kihyun looked startled.

He suddenly started to play something as if nothing ever happened.

"Good." - he stated and started tuning his guitar - "I've prepared a demo of the arrangement for guitar and piano." - he said after he finished tuning the instrument and calmed down a bit.

He scrolled through his phone to find it and played the MIDI file he had prepared. After they finished listening to it Kihyun sat with a blank face.

"You made it yourself?" - he asked in low voice.

Changkyun didn't know what to say. He had never seen such an expression on the boy's face.

"You didn't download it from the Internet? Because it's a file made in some programme, right? You didn't play it yourself, right?" - Kihyun suddenly fired questions at him - "Wait. Of course that you didn't play it because you can't play the piano." - he answered his own question with a wry smile.

Changkyun sighed. Everything was going so well but Kihyun just had to insult him in the end.

"I can play the piano, just not as good as you." - he said with a stern expression but the brunette smirked.

"I'm glad that you acknowledge my skills."

"Shut up." - he cut him off before the other boy had time to say anything else.

He wanted to laugh because it worked. Kihyun sat silent for a while when he suddenly spoke.

"Seriously, I don't get how do you know how to use those programmes when I can't even format a file in Word properly." - he looked as if he was going to implode.

Now Changkyun started to laugh for real. The guy was older than him but he acted like a little kid who didn't get what he wanted. If it wasn't him he would offer to teach him but not after all those words he had heard before.

"Cool." - he said after he stopped laughing - "But now let's actually practise. We have lost half an hour already because of your blabbing." - he added taking out the music sheets of the arrangement he had printed before and handed them to Kihyun.

The older boy threw him a look but took them. He looked through the sheets and they started to play parts of it one by one. Everything was going very slowly especially because Kihyun didn't know the piece before. However, there was one short fragment Changkyun was waiting for because he knew that he would slay it. He had practised it before because he really liked how it sounded and how the arrangement turned out. It was a very quick passage and it wasn't easy. Kihyun only had the music sheets for piano so he didn't know what was coming next. He played it completely forgetting what was around him and only focusing on the music. When he finished everything was so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. He looked up from the guitar and his eyes met with Kihyun's. The older boy looked thunderstruck.

"What?" - he asked him surprised.

Kihyun stared at him for a while clearly hesitant to say what was on his mind.

"Where did you learn to play it so well?" - he asked finally.

"I don't know... Maybe I have a talent?" - he replied looking at him narrowly.

If the dude thought that compliments worked on him  
then he was wrong. It wasn't the time to bury the hatchet yet.


	4. Mr Son's Invitation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N: Ok, so here we have this groundbreaking chapter and I'm so excited for you to read it! And btw don't read the notes at the end before you finish reading the whole chapter.]

As soon as October went it passed. The leaves have fallen entirely from the trees leaving everything grey and dull. It was getting dark very quickly and the weather made everyone feel less optimistic. In fact, Kihyun wasn't optimistic at all. Because it was November already all of their professors started to remind them that they have to start writing their bachelor's thesis. So Kihyun started to panic. He had submitted all the required applications at the dean's office and the dean had approved the topic of his thesis so he really had to start doing something. At the beginning of the academic year he wondered why the senior students had so few classes but now he understood. When it all piled up he basically had no free time. He even stopped seeing Jooheon, Minhyuk and Hyungwon during the lunch breaks because he was studying all the time. However, there was one upside. Now he had no time to think about all the people who were getting on his nerves. Gunhee was spending too much time with Jooheon? Pff, who cares. Minhyuk was being too loud? It was ok as long as he wasn't near Kihyun. Yoosu couldn't stop talking about how awesome he is and what his grandfather did for him? Well, cool for him. And even Dasom's mother finally gave up and stopped calling him. The only thing which was almost equally as draining as writing the thesis were his rehearsals with the freshman kid. Kihyun realised that maybe, just maybe, he had judged him wrong at first but now it was too late to apologise. [A/N: timbaland_apologize_ft.onerepublic.mp3 Lol sorry for that lame joke I gotta go.] He really did have a bit of talent but Kihyun seriously couldn't get why he chose a musical school. He seemed very out of place here and had little interest in classical music. He was good only at playing the guitar. Now the younger boy treated Kihyun dryly at best. Not that he was surprised. They didn't speak too much because it always led to arguments and most of the time Changkyun ignored him and that made Kihyun even angrier than he was before. Now he slowly started to understand how it is when someone looks down on you. He wanted to know why Changkyun was like this but he was too proud to admit that he was wrong and the ginger kid didn't seem to give up anytime soon. It seemed that Changkyun had made it a point of honour to treat him the same way he did treat him before.  
~*~  
When December has started Kihyun had a decent part of his thesis written so he could chill out a bit. His friends, however, were frantic. Hyungwon wrote only one page, Minhyuk didn't even start and Jooheon actually wrote more than Kihyun but he suddenly thought that he didn't like his topic and started to panic but it was too late to change it since everything had been approved in October. One day Gunhee and Kihyun had to comfort him because he started crying after one of their lectures. Kihyun decided to stay with him even though he had a rehearsal with Changkyun half an hour later. Jooheon couldn't calm down so he sat there patting him on the back feeling totally awkward. He wasn't used to dealing with crying people. Kihyun wasn't an emotional person so he couldn't understand Jooheon's reactions at times. He was so worried about him that he didn't even notice that Gunhee had disappeared.  
"Jooheon, it's not the end of the world." - he said turning his head in the boy's direction trying to get his attention but the blonde continued to snuffle - "Jooheon, seriously, you're doing well." - he assured him and stroked his back lightly - "You've written three-quarters of your thesis and we still have five months. You have more than enough time to polish it. See? You'll be good."  
The blonde nodded his head slightly giving a sign that he was actually listening to his words but he didn't look convinced. He wasn't crying anymore but he still looked miserable. Kihyun squizzed his arm when he was suddenly startled by a loud gale of laughter. He looked up and noticed that Gunhee came back with Changkyun and they were both in a playful mood. Kihyun could already feel his blood pressure rise. How could Gunhee be such a dick to leave his supposedly best friend crying to go look for someone else God knows why? He wanted to bawl him out but he didn't have the opportunity to even open his mouth.  
"What did you do to him?" - asked Changkyun sneering and gestured to Jooheon who sat hunched next to him.  
"What did I do?!" - he yelled after the meaning of this words clicked - "Why the hell do you think that I have something to do with that?!" - he felt terribly offended.  
Changkyun never dared to speak like that to him before. Not even mentioning that he misunderstood the whole situation.  
"I don't know..." - mumbled the ginger rolling his eyes - "Maybe because you always hurt others feelings?"  
Kihyun got up from the bench. His face was flushed.  
"I was trying to comfort him when this prick..." - he ground out pointing to Gunhee - "...vanished into thin air instead of helping me."  
He made a step into Changkyun's direction when Jooheon grabbed his arm.  
"Seriously, what the hell is wrong with you two?" - he asked in unbelieving tone and pulled Kihyun's arm harder to make him sit on the bench again - "Please, stop it. You're ridiculous. I'm speaking about you both, Changkyun." - he added after the ginger snorted - "Kihyun did nothing wrong. He's telling the truth. Now stop it and go make up."  
They both glared at each other and they didn't even budge.  
"Please shake hands or else I'll stop talking to you." - the blonde threatened them - "Oh, and you, Changkyun, have to apologize. It's not nice to accuse someone of something they didn't do."  
Apparently, Jooheon suddenly believed that he was a mediator. Kihyun got up first and walked up to Changkyun hesitantly but the younger boy was standing there kicking his heels nervously. There was a longish moment of silence when the younger boy finally opened his mouth.  
"I'm s-sorry." - he stuttered out finally and they shook hands but Kihyun squeezed his hand firmly.  
"You may kiss the groom." - said Gunhee under his breath when they were still holding hands.  
Everyone heard him.  
"What did you say?!" - screeched Kihyun turning into his direction but Jooheon yanked his shirt before he even had time to make a move.  
"Oh my fucking God, what's wrong with yall today?" - said the blonde shaking his head - "Whatever. I don't care. I can't take it anymore. I'm leaving." - he glared at them and did what he said.  
The three of them stared at him in pure shock as he disappeared around the corner. They stood in silence for a few seconds when Gunhee suddenly spoke.  
"Aren't you supposed to go somewhere?"  
"What?" - asked Kihyun and Changkyun in unison and exchanged looks.  
"Rehearsal. Does that tell you anything?" - said Gunhee rising his eyebrow.  
Kihyun sighed. How are they supposed to rehearse together after something like that?  
"Ok, let's go." - he mumbled and started walking.  
They were already ten minutes late. He noticed that the younger boy followed him reluctantly.  
"So what are we going to do now?" - asked Changkyun as they were walking downstairs to the basement.  
"What we are going to do now?" - parroted the brunette - "Practice." - he said curtly - "What have you thought?"  
Out of the corner of his eye, he could see the ginger roll his eyes again but he didn't say anything. They entered the practice room and started to prepare in silence. They had been doing the same routine for so many weeks already that they got used to it. They got used to being quiet and doing what they had to. They played nonstop for about one hour until Kihyun felt that they had the piece more or less polished. They still had more than a month till the concert and he was quite confident that it would go well. Kihyun started to feel very tired after a whole day of classes and he couldn't focus anymore. His mind started to wander. He was brought back to the reality when he heard Changkyun clear his throat.  
"Hey, aren't we supposed to practise?" - he asked reproachfully.  
"Yeah, you're right." - he mumbled - "But it's almost time to finish, anyway." - he added gesturing to the clock - "By the way, I was wondering why did you choose to go to a music school?" - he finally got the guts up to ask him the question that was bothering him.  
Changkyun looked at him narrowly and crossed his arms.  
"No, seriously, I wanted to know that. It's not a tricky question, I mean it sincerely. Do you even like classical music?" - just as he had suspected before, Changkyun thought that he wanted to make fun of him again but it wasn't the case this time.  
Changkyun made a wry face.  
"Why are you so interested in my life suddenly?" - he asked suspiciously.  
Kihyun sighed feeling defeated.  
"Just as I told you, I was wondering." - he said dryly - "What? Can't I ask something I'd like to know?!" - he asked after the ginger threw him a doubtful look - "You don't seem very interested in what you're doing." - he added almost inaudible after a pause.  
After Changkyun heard that and his eyes widened.  
"Well... you guessed it." - he said coolly.  
Kihyun stared at him.  
"Wh-what?" - he stammered.  
"You're right. That's not what I want to do in the future. I don't want to be a classical musician." - Changkyun said that calmly but he could feel that everything was getting tense - "It's not like I hate it but it's not my dream."  
Kihyun was speechless. It wasn't the response he had expected.  
"Um..." - it was only sound that he managed to make - "Er... Don't take it too personally but why are you here, then?" - he asked.  
Changkyun threw him a cold glare.  
"Why do you keep asking me? Why should I unbosom myself to you?" - the kid didn't believe in his pure intentions and he couldn't blame him for that - "I may as well ask you why you are a year older than you're supposed to be." - he said that casually but Kihyun felt as if he was going to faint.  
How the hell did he find out?! Kihyun wanted to scream and run away from the practice room. He gulped but at the same time, he had decided that he had to speak in order to earn his trust. This time his curiosity was stronger than his pride.  
"I'll tell you but you speak first." - he said feeling nervous - "I swear that I'll tell you." - he added after Changkyun sighed theatrically.  
"Promise." - demanded the ginger - "And promise that you won't tell anyone."  
"I promise that I'll tell you why and that I won't blunder out your secret." - he said in a formal tone.  
Changkyun rubbed his temples clearly trying to gather his thoughts.  
"Ok... So, it's quite a long story. My parents wanted me to become a lawyer, just like them. We're a family with a long tradition. I know only one uncle who decided to be an IT specialist but the family immediately dubbed him the bad apple. When I was in middle school I told my parents that I wanted to be a rapper and they weren't happy. They, in fact, had told me that it was a bunch of bollocks and they thought that I'll finally get over it but that never happened. I started to rap and record myself in my free time back then and I also started to learn how to play the guitar from the Internet. I brought the case back this summer when I had to choose a university and they were clearly disappointed. I told them that I didn't want to study law and that I had a plan to take part in a TV show and they of course opposed to that. I wasn't going to give up. I didn't send any university applications as they wanted. I started to prepare to take part in one of those shows instead. One day my dad came to me and told me that I can go to the TV on one condition: that I'll get a proper musical background. So I applied here at the last minute, I came to the audition and I passed it and now I'm here, as you can see. I chose percussion because I believed that it had the most in common with rapping. It's all about rhythm after all. Maybe it was actually quite a good idea because now I'll be able to create my own music. My mum is still bitter that I didn't choose law though." - after Changkyun finished talking he looked as if he was glad to finally express his feelings and Kihyun sat still with his mouth gaped - "Ok, so now you talk. Confession time." - Changkyun gestured at him with a smirk.  
"I-I..." - he stuttered unable to gather his thoughts anymore.  
He had to digest all the words he had heard just before. He never imagined that Changkyun could have a reason like that. He was truly surprised. He cleared his throat and finally spoke.  
"Oh, my reason is kind of silly. I just wasn't 100% sure if I really want to devote my whole life to music so I wanted to try out something different and I studied logistics for one year. And of course, I had realised that it's not for me. I couldn't live without music. So I quit those studies and applied here." - he said feeling a bit awkward.  
The impact of his story was incomparable with Changkyun's. The younger boy blinked a few times and then he started laughing.  
"What?" - blurted out the brunette feeling offended.  
"I seriously thought that you repeated a year and that you keep it a secret and pretend to be a smartass." - he said after he managed to stop laughing - "If it did turn out to be true I'd fucking kill you for making fun of my skills."  
"I didn't!" - he exclaimed feeling a bit terrified by the younger boy's statement - "Minhyuk did though." - he added but after a few seconds but soon he realised that Changkyun probably didn't even know who Minhyuk was.  
"Really?" - he asked in a surprised tone - "Jooheon once told me that you're both older and that's why I was curious."  
Kihyun's jaw dropped.  
"Jooheon?!" - he yelled - "What a fucking big mouth!"  
Changkyun covered his own mouth with a hand.  
"Forget what I just told you." - he mumbled - "Wait, why did Minhyuk repeat a year though, if I may ask?" - he added quickly.  
"Oh, it's just the problem that singing isn't one of his strengths. He had failed the singing exam after the first year and he also failed the retake so he fucked up a big time but they let him stay because he's quite a good clarinettist but he had to repeat the whole year." - he explained quickly - "Just don't tell anyone that you know. Minhyuk is very touchy when it comes to that case."  
"Don't worry. I won't spill the beans. I don't even know him personally anyway." - said Changkyun nodding his head frantically - "By the way, are your parents musicians?"  
When Kihyun heard that question he could feel his face become hot. Oh, no, he had hoped that Changkyun won't ask that question after he had revealed that his parents were lawyers. Now he felt so small in comparison to him.  
"Um... Not really."- he stuttered and remained silent for a while - "My mum is an accountant and my dad owns a small shop, that's it." - he said finally and now he was sure that he was blushing.  
Changkyun stared at him.  
"Oh my God, don't worry, it's not like I'll judge you just because your parents aren't rich. But I'm really surprised that you're the only musician in your family. I thought that if I'll type your name in Google I'll find a long list of famous musicians related to you."  
Kihyun laughed bitterly.  
"No way!" - he exclaimed - "I became a pianist just because my dad loves classical music and jazz and I have just somehow inherited that love. My parents were just different from yours and they let me study music from since I was 4 and I started attending a music school when I was 7. They are quite proud of me."  
"Oh, lucky you." - murmured Changkyun looking a bit jealous.  
Suddenly Kihyun realised that they had been talking for a long time already.  
"Look, we have exceeded the time! We should leave the room at 9 and it's almost half past already."  
"Oh my God, you're right!" - exclaimed the ginger looking terrified - "What if they're going to lock us here?!"  
"Do not panic, you jackass, just hurry!" - he scolded him and they both rushed out of the practice room.  
~*~  
It was a freezing cold and wintry December morning when Shin Hoseok was walking home from his night shift at the hospital. He wore a long, black coat and a huge knitted scarf but he still was shivering because of the icy breeze. His lab coat was hanging from his bag since he couldn't fit it inside. He was rushing through the streets as fast he could not paying attention to all the decorated buildings and lamp posts. Everything was red and green and garnished with fairy lights, stars, snowflakes and angels and there were Christmas trees on almost every corner of a street. It all looked very pretty but he couldn't care less. Hoseok couldn't feel the 'magic' of Christmas after a whole night of taking care of terminally ill patients. He was in an angsty mood because they had lost three people that night. He wanted to talk to someone but he knew that he couldn't burden his flatmate anymore. Hoseok felt that the guy was tired of him talking about such a depressing things all the time. Suddenly he stopped by the building of the Philharmonic Hall. On the front wall behind the columns, there were five huge, colourful posters which captured his attention. Each of the posters was divided into 5 rainbow-coloured squares with black-and-white photos of people. Hoseok walked up closer to take a look at them. There was writing in English on them which said: 'Winter New Years' Concert.' followed by 'A project prepared by the students of the Academy of Music. 25 duos, 25 different pieces, January 10th 2016.' Hoseok stared at the pictures. One of them drew his attention in particular.  
"Is that Kihyun?" - he murmured looking closer at a face of a dark-haired boy who was pictured with a second lighter haired boy when he realised that it was captioned in English: 'Kihyun Yoo and Changkyun Lim.' - "Oh my God, it is." - he said to himself again - "Why didn't he tell me about it?" - he asked no one in particular when it struck him that in fact, he didn't know much about Kihyun even though they had been flatmates for almost 3 years already - "I want to see that concert." - he mumbled deciding to ask Kihyun about it when he would get home.  
Maybe it will brighten his mood after all those tough days and hard work at the hospital. He started to walk away from the building but he quickly came back.  
"Wait." - he said and took a closer look at the photo again - "That second guy looks familiar as well."  
He tried very hard to recall where he had seen his face but he couldn't so he turned around and started to walk home again. His hands felt cold and stiff like icicles so he had to hurry.  
~*~  
It was 15th of December and it was the last orchestra rehearsal that year and everyone was already thinking about the nearing winter break. Especially the third year students had enough of studying. They couldn't even look at a computer screen and not think about their theses. They just wanted to go home and think about Christmas trees and snowmen instead. No one was very focused and everyone played their instruments half-heartedly. Mr Son took a pity on them and let them be. He probably was almost equally tired as them because it was quite late and all of them had classes before. When the rehearsal was nearing an end Mr Son suddenly cleared his throat loudly to get their attention. Everyone froze. They thought that he will take them to task for not being focused but that never happened.  
"Ok, guys." - started the teacher - "I wanted to thank you for your cooperation during those last few weeks..." - when he said that a few people started to cheer loudly, Gunhee being one of them - "And I have an announcement for you. I'm organizing a Christmas party this Friday and I want to invite all of you as a prize for your hard work." - he said that and everyone fell silent listening to his words attentively - "I know that you'll probably be going home next Tuesday so I'm not really sure if you have time to come but I'd be happy if at least some of you can. So if you already know that you can't, please come up to me after the rehearsal and tell me. And those who will come, please send me an email. I'll send a message to you with all the details of the party after everyone confirms if they will come or not." - he explained.  
When he finished talking the auditorium filled with loud chatter. Everyone seemed to be excited and Kihyun turned around to look for his friends. When his eyes found Jooheon, Minhyuk and Hyungwon all the three boys nodded to confirm that they want to come as well so Kihyun decided to tell Mr Son that he will be there that Friday.  
~*~  
The three days passed quickly and it was already Friday evening and Changkyun had arrived at the hotel where the party was supposed to take place. He was amazed how it was possible that Mr Son managed to throw a party in such a place. Was he rich? Or was it actually the school who paid for that? He had no idea. When he entered the building he couldn't help to stare in amazement at the richly decorated lounge. It was so huge that he felt small and lost. He hoped that he will find Gunhee or Jooheon somewhere. Changkyun was a bit disappointed because he seemed to be the only person who came alone. He crossed his arms and looked around to find some familiar faces. He couldn't see anyone so he greeted the receptionist and walked into the room where the party was supposed to take place. He felt very confused so he stood by one of the walls and smoothed his white shirt nervously. He stood there awkwardly for a few minutes when he suddenly heard someone call his name. He looked up and there were his classmates: Yoonho and Seokwon. He smiled brightly and walked up to them.

Kihyun stood with his three friends who were extremely excited. He couldn't even remember the last time he had seen them act like that. They were like a bunch of kindergarteners - jumping up and down and giggling. Kihyun liked to have fun sometimes but he couldn't stand those three when they acted so childishly. He started to get bored because he couldn't even have a meaningful conversation with them when the only sound they were able to make in that state were high-pitched squeals. Seriously, were they a twenty-one or so year old men or fifteen-year-old girls? At this particular moment, Kihyun couldn't tell. He stood there rolling his eyes when suddenly Mr Son came up to him.  
"Mr Yoo, are you having fun?" - asked the conductor and Kihyun gave him a thumbs up but the teacher didn't seem convinced.  
Damn, Kihyun wasn't a person who could pretend well.  
"I just wanted to tell you that we'll have a Christmas carols and songs competition in about an hour." - he said proudly with a wide smile - "So I'm expecting that you and your friends will take part in it."  
"Sure." - he blurted out but he secretly hoped that Jooheon, Minhyuk and Hyungwon will refuse because he really wasn't in a mood to sing.  
Mr Son smiled even brighter and clapped his hands like a little child. Kihyun fought an urge to shake his head in disbelief. What was wrong with all that people?! Was everyone high on Christmas atmosphere?  
"Oh, and there is also a buffet table with some snacks and drinks." - said the teacher gesturing to the opposite side of the room before he walked away.  
Kihyun thanked him and sighed in relief. Now he had an excuse to leave this bunch of idiots. He told his friends that he was hungry and walked up to the table. He took a few snacks and sat in a corner to eat peacefully. He felt glad for a few minutes that he had some time to sit alone in peace after spending time with all those noisy and overly excited people until he had noticed that some couple was snogging just next to him. He growled softly and decided to change a seat but when he walked past them he recognised who it was. When he saw them he felt as if his heart stopped beating. He wanted to scream but he restrained himself and walked away as quickly as he could. No, no, no. That couldn't be. It had to be a nightmare. He definitely was dreaming. He pinched his arm but it hurt. No fucking way. The girl was Dasom with no one other than this goddamn headmaster's pupil Kim Yoosu. How did this snooty knucklehead manage to pick her up? Kihyun couldn't believe his own eyes. He knew that he had told everyone that he didn't love her anymore and that was more or less true but he couldn't accept that she decided to date such a moron. He was furious. He sat down on another seat and clutched his hands when he suddenly noticed a bottle of wine. He decided to pour himself a glass. Maybe it will soothe his heart.

Changkyun couldn't remember the last time he felt so happy. Everyone was so nice to him, so friendly. Even Yoonho and Seokwon who used to treat him coldly at the very beginning of the academic year. Everything had changed after the day when they advised him to go to the doctor. After he had told them that he was in the hospital they got worried and started to be nicer to him and they even had sent him all their notes from the lectures when Changkyun was absent. They weren't friends yet but they definitely treated him nicely and he was nice to them as well. He had really a lot of fun with them at the party that day. He had spent the whole time with them laughing and chatting since he couldn't find Gunhee anywhere. Changkyun realised that the older boy probably had already gone home for the break. He had only seen Jooheon once but he was with Kihyun and the rest of their friends so he really didn't want to come up to them. And it was actually a good idea because he was having fun with someone else. Mr Son told them about the singing competition and Changkyun and his two classmates felt quite excited waiting for it to start. He wasn't really sure if he wanted to take part in it because he felt very self-conscious about his voice but Seokwon and Yoonho really wanted to sing. They even started to argue which one of the two of them will win but Changkyun prefered to just watch others so he excused himself at the last moment before it started and went up to a small table to eat some gingerbread which lay there on a plate. He started to be hungry and before that he had only some wine. He already felt a bit dizzy but he wasn't drunk yet. He had only just a bit more than a glass anyway.

Kihyun felt terrible. He watched the couple walk past the table where he was sitting and they were holding hands. One could almost picture hearts flying over their heads. Kihyun felt nauseous. He had lost the count how much he had drunk. He wanted to show them that he's not affected. That he doesn't care about Dasom anymore. Suddenly a brilliant idea came up to his mind.

Changkyun took a few of those cookies and started to eat. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see that the competition had already started. In this particular moment, it was Jooheon who had the mic. He was singing loudly but a bit out of tune. Changkyun giggled. Jooheon was a social butterfly and he never failed to entertain others. He probably decided to sing first because others were too scared. Suddenly he started to feel warm and a bit sleepy. He should probably blame the alcohol for that but it was also quite late already. His eyelids started to get heavy but he suddenly opened his eyes when something blocked the light. He looked up and noticed that someone was standing before him. He tried to focus and he recognised Kihyun.  
"Oh, that's you." - he stated dryly.  
He had no idea what could the older boy want from him. He got up and tried to walk away but Kihyun followed him until he stopped in a corner. Now he had nowhere else to go.  
"What do you want from me?" - he asked him.  
Seriously, they weren't even friends. Suddenly he realised that the brunette was smiling like an overly optimistic idiot.  
"Kihyun, what the fuck is wrong with you? Are you drunk?"  
He had never ever smiled when Changkyun was next to him. After he had asked that question Kihyun smiled even wider.  
"No... I'm allight... Why are you athking?" - he replied inarticulately and now he was sure that the brunette definitely was drunk as a skunk.  
He had noticed that the older boy would occasionally speak with a lisp but now his pronunciation was ten times worse.  
"Oh my God, leave me alone. I don't know what's going on and I guess that I don't want to." - he said and tried to walk away but he was stuck in the corner. Kihyun stared at him for a few seconds but then he looked up and his face lightened up.  
"Look!" - he exclaimed cheerfully - "A mithletoe!"  
"What?!" - he screeched but the brunette wasn't listening to him and started to come closer, up to the point that he was almost leaning against him.  
Changkyun could picture the blue screen of death in his mind. Error 404: changkyun.exe not found.  
"That's a cuthom I gueth..." - whispered Kihyun very softly but he heard him perfectly clearly.  
Changkyun's back was touching the cold brick wall and now he was even more aware of that than he was before. He had nowhere to escape but he still couldn't get a word out. And yet, he felt weirdly excited. His heart was pounding madly and he could almost hear the blood run through his veins. It was as if the time had frozen. It couldn't be real. It had to be a dream. Or he had drunk too much and now he was hallucinating. It was a fact, that he found Kihyun attractive at first but it lasted only up to the moment when the older boy opened his mouth. He was such a prick that everything disappeared like a popped soap bubble. Suddenly Kihyun rested his palms on the back of his neck and shortened the distance between their faces. Kihyun's lips slowly ghosted over his but in the end, he hesitated. Changkyun wasn't sure why but he shut his eyes and pressed their lips together. Kihyun's lips were soft and weirdly hot. It didn't last long. After a few second's the brunette backed away. The younger boy opened his eyes and stared at him for a long moment when the brunette suddenly started to walk away. Changkyun felt petrified but he quickly got his act together.  
"Wait!" - he called out - "What the fuck was that supposed to be? HEY! Explain that!" - he yelled but Kihyun disappeared somewhere between all those people.  
Changkyun felt terribly confused. How could he do something like that and just leave? His heart was still beating extremely fast.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N: Ok, I feel like the thing Kihyun did is a bit wrong but I swear that it will be explained in next chapter. Btw when it idea first came up to my mind I was a bit reluctant to include that in the story because I was like: 'how is it possible that someone will fall in love/ start having a crush on somebody after a kiss on a party? That's ridiculous.' But then I remembered that it was actually a thing that happened to me. When I was about 17 my friend made me and someone else kiss at a party and we eventually started to date each other. So before anyone says that it's stupid please take that into account ;-)]


	5. If they gave medals for being a prick you would win gold

Suddenly Kihyun opened his eyes. The curtains were opened and the sunlight was so bright that it hurt his eyes. He sat up and rubbed his face. The boy looked around and realised that he had been sleeping on the couch of his living room the whole night. He tried to focus and recall how he got there the night before but he didn't remember anything. Kihyun hoped that he didn't drive home himself in that state but he believed that his friends were responsible enough to say no to him so he assumed that it was them who took him home. He took his phone to check what time it was. He had completely lost the sense of time. He had no idea how he got home and how long he slept. It was 12 pm already. Kihyun groaned. His head was pounding. He felt as if he had a migraine but he wasn't sure because he never had one. Why did he drink so much last night? It was definitely a huge mistake. He looked at the screen for a second time and he suddenly noticed that he had more than 20 unread messages. His heart rate started to accelerate. Last time something like that happened was 4 years ago when he went to one of his older friends birthday party and he got so drunk that he didn't come back home that night. After that, he had exactly 126 messages from his parents. He will never forget that number. But this time the messages couldn't be from his mum and dad. He gulped nervously and as he wanted to read one of them he got startled by the jingle of an upcoming new one. He got so scared that he almost fell off the couch. It was a message from Hyungwon and he opened it immediately after he calmed down a bit. It said, "Take your car from the parking lot before they will give you a heavy fine." Kihyun started to sweat. On the one hand, he felt relieved that he didn't drive home but on the other, he felt dread because the car was still in the hotel's parking lot. And he still couldn't pick it from there because he didn't feel sober enough yet. He sighed heavily and decided to read the rest of the messages. All of them were from his 3 friends: Minhyuk, Jooheon and Hyungwon and 90% of them was something like "Where did you go during the party? We couldn't find you, we were worried and when we did find you, you were canned wtf explain." Kihyun wanted to scream. What had he done? Why did he do that? He wanted an explanation as well. Oh, no, how embarrassing! How could he do something like this on a party organised by his university? He wanted to bang his head on the wall. Suddenly a realisation came to him. He recalled that moment when he saw Dasom with Yoosu and how he was flooded with jealousy after that. Kihyun shook his head after the thought came to his mind. He couldn't understand his own reaction anymore. He knew that he shouldn't be jealous of her. They broke up months ago. She had the right to be happy with someone else. Alright, but it wasn't just some random guy he didn't know before. If it was he could let them be. But it was YOOSU. This fucker who laughed in his face when he tried to flirt with his ex-girlfriend right in front of him and he WILL NOT ALLOW THAT. Kihyun growled and rolled over on the couch. But logically thinking he had a right to be happy with someone else as well. He contemplated the thought for a while when suddenly something else came up to his mind. A touch of someone's trembling lips. At the memory, he felt overwhelmed by panic. That was exactly what he had thought that night. That he had the right to be with someone else and it seemed to be a brilliant idea to kiss the first person who he could find under the mistletoe. With his mind fogged with alcohol it really did seem to be a great idea. But now it filled him with dread. He didn't even know who it was. The last thing he remembered was bumping into Mr Son. OH, NO. His heart started to beat like crazy. What if Mr Son was standing under the mistletoe? He remembered that there were garlands with mistletoe interwoven in them on the walls. And he was sure of one thing. He didn't kiss a girl. He remembered broad shoulders and flat chest. It was NOT a girl. He hid his face in his hands. Why did his drunk ass think that it was ok to kiss anyone? Like literary anyone? Fuck it, it doesn't matter if it's a girl or a boy? Wtf, brain. He never ever fantasised about being something more than a friend with a guy. He didn't even have dreams like that. It didn't make sense what he had done. And if it really was Mr Son he was fucked up. How will he be able to show up on the next orchestra rehearsal? How will he be able to look at him? How did Mr Son feel about that? Did he have a girlfriend? A wife? Was he gay? The person who he had kissed didn't slap him or anything and if someone did something like that to Kihyun out of the blue he would surely do that without thinking twice. But Mr Son was a teacher. He was the one in charge. He could do anything in response to what Kihyun did. If he didn't like what Kihyun had done, what was more than certain, Mr Son could throw him out of the orchestra, tell the headmaster about his immoral behaviour or even get a revenge on Kihyun by for example giving him an F for everything he would do during their classes. Oh, yes, he did fuck up whatever will be the result. What he had done was extremely wrong. Kihyun curled up on the couch. He wanted to sink into the sofa and disappear. Never show up at the university anymore. The only thing that did uprise him was the fact that he had two weeks of winter holidays until the next orchestra rehearsal. Maybe Christmas and New Year's Eve will let him think about something else and maybe he'll find a solution.  
~*~  
It was two days before Christmas and Changkyun's family was in rush. Everyone wanted to finish the preparations as quickly as they could. They wanted to have at least a bit of rest before the Christmas day. Changkyun was sitting at the table trying to untangle the fairy lights. He and his cousins were supposed to decorate the tree and since he was the oldest he had to prepare everything before the kids could choose the decorations. It was a tedious job and Changkyun had a lot of time to think, unfortunately. He couldn't focus and his thoughts were revolving around the kiss all the time. He kept thinking about the incident the whole week. He was recalling the situation everytime he had even a bit of time to be alone with his thoughts. He didn't manage to catch Kihyun up that day and he still had no idea why the older boy did that. He slowly stopped feeling confused and his emotions started to morph into anger. He started to believe that this kiss was probably some kind of a prank or a bet. He regretted letting him do that because it has made him a mess. He should've pushed him. Suddenly he was brought to the reality by his aunt's voice. She was the wife of his mum's little brother who was the IT specialist. His aunt and uncle and their three children were spending the whole winter holidays at Changkyun's family house.  
"Changkyun, are you alright?" - she asked calmly - "It seems that something is bothering you. You're spacing out a lot recently. Is it about your studies?"  
"N-no." - he stuttered - "It's ok." - he assured her.  
She nodded understandingly but she didn't seem convinced.  
"I just wanted you to know that you can always talk to me if something is bothering you." - she said smiling slightly.  
He just nodded in response. He always liked this aunt because she was very cheerful and she was only 15 years older than him. Just as he was about to crawl into his shell again he felt that someone was tugging on his shirt on the back. This someone had to be very short since Changkyun was sitting. He turned around and saw his three-year-old cousin. The little boy was staring at him with puppy eyes.  
"Changkyunnie, ith the light leady?" - he asked shyly focusing his eyes on the chain of lights Chankyun had in his hands - "We want to decorate the tlee alleady." - he added with a pout.  
The baby's lisp reminded him about Kihyun again but he tried to smile not to scare the child.  
"Yes, almost. I just have to check if they work. Come with me." - he gestured for the boy to go and they plugged the fairy lights in the socket.  
Changkyun sighed with relief because if the lights didn't shine he would have to check every single tiny lamp in the chain. The boy smiled gleefully and run somewhere. He stopped before his oldest brother and hugged him.  
"Minjun, Changkyun fixed the lights!" - he squealed and the older brother stroked his head.  
"Great, good boy! I knew he can't refuse you." - replied the seven-year-old with a smug smile.  
Changkyun rolled his eyes. He could guess that the oldest one was plotting something. He always tried to convince his siblings to do something for him. Suddenly he noticed something.  
"Minjun, where is Minseo?" - he asked with panic in his voice.  
The five-year-old wasn't in the living room with the rest of the family. What if she was doing something stupid like for example trying to pet the fish which were in a tank in the hallway? The boy looked at him with a bored expression.  
"Oh, Minseo? She wanted to play with your sister's dolls but I doubt that she would let her." - replied Minjun raising his eyebrow.  
Changkyun shook his head. He didn't know what was worse; if she tried to stick her hand into the fish tank or if she tried to enter his sister's room. Suddenly they all heard a loud scream from upstairs followed by a small child crying. After a few seconds, the little girl ran into the room with her face red and wet from tears.  
"Mummy, Chaewon said she won't borrow me her dolls!" - she wailed.  
Changkyun gritted his teeth. His sister was unbearable. She was a major pain in the butt. As she turned 15 she believed that she was practically an adult and started to rebel. She did what she wanted and his parents had a lot of trouble with her. She was one of the reasons why he was glad that he was now away from home. Apparently, his mum had heard that his little cousin was crying because she got out of the kitchen. She stopped directly at the bottom of the stairs.  
"Chaewon, get down NOW!" - the woman yelled.  
Changkyun heard a shuffle from upstairs and the girl showed up in the living room promptly. She stopped before her mother with a very disgusted face and with her arms folded.  
"Chaewon, why won't you give your dolls to Minseo?" - she asked reproachfully and glared at her but the girl didn't even budge.  
"Mum! She will destroy them! Have you seen what she did to her own dolls?!" - she looked highly offended.  
"But Chaewon, aren't you too old for dolls? You don't even play with them anymore!" - their dad peeked into the room with a mop in his hand.  
He was cleaning the rest of the house.  
The girl laughed mockingly.  
"Of course I don't! I want to sell them on eBay so they have to be in perfect condition." - she replied with a poker face.  
Changkyun glanced at his mum. Her face was already flushed. He could sense that she may burst out any second.  
"Oh, no, my dear. You won't do that. I can still decide what you will do with your things and I'm telling you that you won't sell them now." - she said quite calmly but her glare was terrifying.  
"But mum!" - the girl moaned and stomped her feet.  
"Honey," - his mum was now talking to her husband - "please bring the dolls and give them to our little Minseo."  
The man nodded and walked out of the room and his mum came back to the kitchen. Suddenly, Chaewon started to walk in his direction.  
"How is your new school, Changkyunnie?" - she asked in a mocking tone.  
He could sense that she was up to something.  
"Good." - he replied dryly.  
"When will you find a girlfriend? I thought you would come with someone." - she said sneering.  
Changkyun stared at her.  
"I don't know..." - he replied slowly - "Maybe never? Why do you care?" - he threw her a cold glare hoping that she will leave him alone.  
"Are you still a virgin?" - she whispered but it was loud enough to be heard by everyone.  
Changkyun choked and started coughing.  
"Chaewon, behave!" - their mum came back just in time to hear this one short sentence and as she said that she threw an apron at the girl - "You will help me with cooking and it's non-negotiable." - she said sternly.  
Changkyun couldn't believe what he had just heard. What was wrong with that girl?! Why did she start talking about that so suddenly? Was she already not? He didn't even want to think about that. She was only 15! Two years ago she still played with dolls. He really hoped that she just wanted to humiliate him.  
"Changkyunnie, what's a virgin?" - asked suddenly the youngest f his cousins.  
He had already forgotten that the kids were right there by his side. He gulped. How was he supposed to explain something like that to a three-year-old?  
"Maybe it's something like Virgin Mary?" - said the oldest of the siblings out of the blue.  
Changkyun wanted to hug him for saving him but he restrained himself because it would be weird.  
"Ok, let's go decorate the Christmas tree." - he addressed the children and the four of them walked out of the living room.  
~*~  
They came back to the university on the 4th of January. The holidays were awesome for Changkyun. Well, maybe ignoring the existence of his stupid little sister. But it was mostly really great. He had spent a lot of time with his family and now he started to appreciate that after he had spent 3 long months away from home. And then he had met with his high school friends on the New Year's Eve and they talked about all the schools, careers and universities they had chosen. Now Changkyun had almost forgotten about the infamous party organised by Mr Son. Almost, because everything hit him like a truck when he caught the glimpse of Kihyun's dark hair in the cafeteria. The older boy was there eating the lunch with his friends as usual. After he stared at them for a few seconds Jooheon noticed him and waved to him but Changkyun quickly turned around and started to look for some free table but there were only a few empty chairs next to Son Gunhee. He greeted him and sat down. Changkyun started to eat his lunch in silence when suddenly he realised that Gunhee was looking at him narrowly. He gulped because he felt intimidated.  
"Why didn't you wave back?" - asked the brunette suspiciously.  
"What?" - he didn't understand what he meant at first.  
"Why didn't you wave back to Jooheon?" - he asked for a second time.  
Changkyun stared.  
"Um... I-it's not about Jooheon." - he stuttered - "If you'll meet him and if he's angry at me for ignoring at him just tell him that I didn't mean that." - he added quickly.  
"Why don't you tell him yourself?" - said Gunhee rising his eyebrows.  
Changkyun fidgeted on his spot.  
"Right, I'll tell him." - he replied nodding frantically and Gunhee stared at him even more - "I'm sorry I have to go." - he blurted out and took all his belongings.  
He couldn't stand Gunee's speculative look. He had suddenly lost his appetite.

To his horror, Changkyun kept bumping into Kihyun the whole Monday. He saw him literary everywhere. Even when he went to the toilet he met him there but the older boy didn't notice him since Changkyun backed away as quickly as he could. He felt very unprepared for the Tuesday because Kihyun will definitely be there on the orchestra's rehearsal. And even worse, the tutoring and the last but one rehearsal for the concert was on Thursday. The last rehearsal was supposed to be on Friday and the concert was on Saturday. Changkyun had nowhere to escape. He will be stuck with Kihyun for the most of the week. And the prospect of that was like a nightmare.  
~*~  
Before the Tuesday orchestra's rehearsal Kihyun, Minhyuk and Hyungwon were waiting for it to start as usual. But actually, nothing was normal. Minhyuk and Hyungwon gathered around Kihyun who looked very ill. The brunette was trembling slightly and he was as white as a sheet.  
"Kihyun, are you ok? Are you sick? Do you have a fever?" - asked the blonde touching his forehead - "No... I don't think so... It's not hot." - he murmured to himself.  
"I'm fine." - mumbled Kihyun but his voice was very faint.  
Hyungwon frowned.  
"How can you say that you're good when I can see that you're turning green." - he said reproachingly and focused his eyes on his face - "Maybe you should go home?"  
Kihyun squirmed on his spot.  
"I can't go home when we're having the concert this weekend! Did you forget about that?!" - he yelled suddenly and Hyungwon shook his head looking disgruntled.  
"You're impossible! I don't know if you noticed but we're trying to help you!" - the taller brunette started to yell as well and Minhyuk stared at them in shock.  
"Oh my God, are you arguing again?" - it was Gunhee who came with Jooheon - "I wish I was such a good friend as you." - he added with a sly smile.  
Minhyuk started to wave his hands in panic and gesturing for them to leave but it didn't work.  
"Oh, no, Jooheon why did you bring this idiot over again?" - he asked in a whiny tone - "He always makes everything 10 times worse. Oh, and also Kihyun is sick but he doesn't want to do anything about that so maybe you'll talk him to his senses."  
Jooheon gulped loudly.  
"Kihyun is sick?" - he asked with panic in his voice - "He's SICK?! Kihyun?!" - he cried looking around as if he didn't notice that the short brunette was sitting on one of the chairs.  
Minhyuk and Hyungwon facepalmed themselves at the same time.  
"Great, you forgot that Jooheon is a scaremonger. Now he's the one we have to bring back to his senses." - grumbled the taller brunette.  
After Gunhee told Jooheon to breathe more than 15 times the platinum blonde one finally calmed down.  
"Oh, no, Kihyun, you should go home!" - whined the blonde glancing at the short brunette with fright.  
It seemed as if he expected him to die any second. Kihyun glared at his friends.  
"Seriously, can you finally shut up?! How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not sick?" - now he looked really angry - "I'm just nervous and you make me stressed out even more!"  
Gunhee sneered.  
"Ooh, our almighty Kihyun is nervous so he has to order everyone around!" - he said scornfully.  
"Shut... the fuck... up." - the brunette ground out trying to kill him with his glare.  
Suddenly someone cleared his throat.  
"Mr Yoo, please don't swear." - said Mr Son coldly appearing out of nowhere - "I'll keep an eye on you." - he added and walked away.  
Apparently, he walked past them just in time to hear that. Kihyun grew even paler and the rest of the boys started to laugh as soon as Mr Son disappeared around a corner.  
"Why does he even care?" - asked Minhyuk in surprised tone - "He's like 2 years older than us!"  
"Wierd, right?" - said Gunhee in surprised tone but Jooheon and Hyungwon just shrugged.  
Kihyun gulped audibly what made the rest pay attention to him. Gunhee laughed shortly.  
"Are you scared of Mr Son? How come?" - asked the round-faced brunette trying to stop laughing.  
Minhyuk and Hyungwon frowned. Kihyun cleared his throat.  
"Um... I-I think I'll go to the auditorium earlier." - he stammered and got up.  
He wanted to avoid responding to that question. His heart was doing crazy things and he seriously felt like he was going to faint. When Mr Son suddenly reprimanded him Kihyun knew that something was different than usual. Minhyuk was right. Mr Son was too young to pay attention to something like that. He had to be angry at him for some reason. Kihyun wanted to disappear. He didn't want to face Mr Son after all the things that happened at the party. He entered the auditorium which was still empty and sat on the piano stool hoping that he cannot be seen from behind the instrument. Kihyun glanced at the clock. They still had 20 minutes so he took out the sheet music and after a few moments, he decided to revise the piece they had been practising. He played deeply focused but after a while, he stopped because he could sense that someone was watching him. He turned around and there really was someone standing behind his back. When he saw him his heart started to race and he felt overwhelmed with fear. It was Mr Son. Kihyun stared at him in shock.  
"Wow, Mr Yoo, you seriously are talented. I'm proud of you." - said the older man unexpectedly calmly.  
The brunette didn't know how to reply. It wasn't what he expected to hear. He stayed quiet for a few seconds feeling weird.  
"I-I... - he stammered suddenly gaining confidence to talk about the case that was bothering him.  
If the teacher won't forgive him now then he never will.  
"Mr Son, I have to apologise." - he said in low voice - "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to do that. It was a misunderstanding." - he was too afraid to look up so he stared at the floor - "I'm so sorry for what happened at the party." - he added and he decided that he has to look Mr Son in the eyes in order to look truly sincere.  
When he looked at him he was surprised to see a look of pure shock.  
"Mr Yoo, can you be clearer?" - said the conductor after a long moment of awkward silence - "I'm afraid that I don't know what you mean."  
Kihyun blushed. He felt as if his cheeks were on fire. Why was he teasing him??  
"I-I... Er..." - he stuttered feeling that he had lost the ability to think properly - "I did something inappropriate and I'm sorry." - he finally said becoming even redder.  
Mr Son looked at him narrowly and after a few moments, he shook his head.  
"Mr Yoo, I'm afraid that I still have no idea what you are talking about. Yes, I did see that you weren't quite sober at my party but you're an adult and that's not my business how much you decide to drink."  
Kihyun felt as if he was falling down. Was he wrong the entire time? Now he felt really dizzy. Who was it then?  
"Honestly, I don't care if you were drunk." - said the teacher after he noticed that Kihyun suddenly turned white - "And I didn't see you doing anything weird. You didn't dance in the middle of the table..." - here he cleared his throat - "...like for example some people I know."  
At that moment the orchestra members started to gather so Mr Son excused himself and walked away. Kihyun's mind was totally blank. What is he going to do if it wasn't Mr Son that he had kissed?

He felt extremely nervous throughout the whole rehearsal. He thought that everything will be clearer after he apologized to Mr Son but since the conductor didn't even know what he meant everything got complicated. Kihyun really didn't remember anything else besides that he kissed a man. He started to swear in his mind. Why couldn't he recall that? He was afraid that it will come forward in the most unexpected situation or that someone who shouldn't have seen the kiss saw it and that the person will use it against him. Suddenly a memory appeared in his mind. He felt that anger and jealousy again. He knew that he wanted to make Dasom jealous at first. Maybe his drunk brain thought that he should kiss someone when she was watching? Maybe she had seen it. He started to think about that and he came to the conclusion that it was the only chance to find out who it was. He decided to talk to her after the rehearsal.

When the rehearsal had finished everyone stood up what created an unbelievable mess. Kihyun tried to focus. He didn't want to lose Dasom in the crowd. Everyone however, seemed to be in a rush so he knew that he had to be alert. She might walk out of the room at any time. He quickly packed his belongings and started to squeeze through the crowd saying 'excuse me' countless times. Finally, he caught her up near the entrance.  
"Dasom!" - he called to make her pay attention to him.  
She turned around and looked at him but she didn't move. He walked up to her and he stood awkwardly for a while because he didn't know how to start.  
"Hi." - he said dryly no longer knowing how he should talk with her.  
At first, when he saw her with Yoosu he was angry but now as he was thinking his emotions had become lukewarm.  
"Hi, Kihyun." - she said softly and glanced at him curiously - "Why are you here?"  
He felt as if her big, brown eyes were burning a hole in his face. She always had those piercing eyes.  
"I wanted to talk with you." - he replied in low voice.  
Dasom sighed and he suddenly his heartbeat started to accelerate for the nth time that day. He could guess that she probably won't want to talk to him after all these things they had been through before.  
"What happened?" - the brown haired girl seemed worried and annoyed at the same time - "If you want to beg me to come back to you I would like to inform you that I already have a new boyfriend." - she announced crossing her arms - "And it's a serious relationship." - she added sharply.  
Kihyun frowned.  
"No..." - he started slowly - "I don't want to go through all of that again. I've gone over that." - he stopped talking for a moment to think how to put it into words - "But actually I have seen your boyfriend already. It was at Mr Son's party. It's Yoosu, right?" - he asked and then she nodded reluctantly - "I have to confess that I was jealous at first but I'm over that now."  
The girl frowned. Now she seemed deeply concerned.  
"I don't want to talk about him though." - he added quickly frantically shaking his head.  
He noticed her mood change and he didn't want the girl to walk away.  
"S-so," - the boy suddenly stammered - "because I was jealous of you I wanted to make you notice me and I did something stupid at the party." - he said lowering his head.  
"Ok..." - replied the girl slowly - "And what am I supposed to say to that?"  
Kihyun cleared his throat.  
"Oh, it's easy. Have you seen me doing something stupid with someone with whom I definitely shouldn't be doing that thing?"  
"What?" - she looked at him as if she just saw an alien - "Why would I pay attention to you when I was with Yoosu?" - she asked in a surprised tone.  
"Because I wanted to make you pay attention to me." - he said coolly - "But it seems it didn't work." - he added sadly.  
"Oh my God, I'll never find out who it is." - he muttered under his breath but Dasom heard that anyway.  
"Who is who?" - she repeated.  
"Did I say it out loud?!" - he replied in a panicky voice.  
"Yeah." - Dasom was looking at him in that scary way again.  
He tried to get his act together and he decided to talk sincerely with her. He needed to talk to someone. If he kept that kiss to himself he would go crazy.  
"Um..." - he murmured kicking his heels - "I did something very wrong at that party. I got drunk when I saw you with Yoosu." - when he said that a look of fear showed on the girl's face but he decided to keep talking - "So I don't know why but I thought that I had to make you feel jealous and I decided to kiss someone under the mistletoe. And I did it. Now I don't even remember who it was but I want to apologise to that person." - he said and he felt so ashamed that he kept staring at the floor.  
"Oh my God." - muttered the girl - "That indeed was dumb. But I'm sorry I can't help you. I didn't see you that night." - she said walking up to him and she put her hand on his arm - "But cheer up. I think that maybe she won't be angry at you. Maybe she secretly liked you before?"  
Kihyun frowned. How could that be even possible? Maybe in some utopian world. Girls. Hopeless romantics. He thanked her for the advice but unfortunately, he thought that it couldn't be useful. They talked a bit more and during the most of the conversation Dasom just bragged about her new boyfriend and Kihyun really started wondering if they knew the same Yoosu. But he decided to stick to his thought that they both had the right to be with someone else. He had to respect that. Yoosu was probably nasty just to the people he didn't like. And in fact, Kihyun had noticed that he always acted like a gentleman in the company of women and it was why he was liked by them. He was always popular with ladies. Maybe he wasn't so bad after all but he still was snooty. When they finished talking and Dasom walked away Kihyun started to think about her words again. Yes, he had to apologise to him if he ever finds him but he probably hated him now. It was impossible that anyone would like to be kissed without their consent. The guy, whoever it was will probably accuse him of harassment. Weird, that he didn't do that already. It would be one chance in a billion if the person actually liked him. And it was a man so it was virtually impossible. Kihyun shook his head. It's a pipe dream. And Kihyun wouldn't even like him back so he would hurt him anyway.  
~*~  
Two days passed and still, nothing happened. Whoever the person was he definitely didn't want to reveal himself. Now that he knew that it wasn't Mr Son he started to be calmer. He stopped thinking about the kiss every 5 minutes. Kihyun almost forgot about that incident. Maybe that guy was so ashamed that he didn't want to speak about it ever again? Maybe he will never know who it was? Kihyun decided that he has to live on. He eventually started to feel more relaxed. Those days he was more preoccupied with the nearing concert. That day he had the last but one rehearsal before the dress rehearsal and he had to make sure that everything was perfect. As usual, he entered the room half an hour earlier and he waited for that ginger-haired freshman to show up. He really hoped that he won't be late but that kid was so annoying that he could never be sure. To his relief, the ginger came five minutes earlier. Kihyun greeted him but the younger boy just threw him a glance, sat down and started to tune his guitar. The brunette shrugged and decided to prepare everything as well. He had thought that after they had that deep talk everything will be better but he apparently was wrong. He started the rehearsal but everything felt very heavy. Changkyun didn't say even a single word. It was true that he was usually very quiet but not THAT quiet. And what was even worse the boy didn't listen to him. The ginger spaced out about 10 times already and when they were nearing the end of the practice Kihyun almost completely lost his temper. How were they supposed to do well in the concert when that kid was so unfocused and unprepared?! What did he do to deserve a partner like that? And still, he had to tutor him on playing the piano. How was he supposed to do that when the boy was deaf as a post?  
"Changkyun, seriously, what's wrong with you?!" - he yelled.  
He had lost his temper. He had enough. He didn't sign for such a working conditions. The ginger-haired boy was looking at the floor the whole day but when heard Kihyun's words he looked at him. When their eyes met the brunette felt a cold shiver on his spine. He had never ever seen in his life seen such a look that carried so many emotions. Oh, no. No way. Was CHANGKYUN the person he...? Suddenly the younger boy spoke for the first time that day.  
"If they gave medals for being a prick you would win gold." - he ground out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N]: I'm not really sure if you'll like that because you probably expected some action but here we have a chapter which is mostly Kihyun thinking, hm... But seriously, this is the longest chapter ever and it was supposed to be a whole with something else but I decided to split it. Oh, and also there were a lot of things to explain so most of the chapter is trying to explain those things.


	6. I hate you or maybe I don't

"Changkyun, seriously, what's wrong with you?!" - Kihyun yelled.  
He had lost his temper. He had enough. He didn't sign for such a working conditions.  
"If they gave medals for being a prick you would win gold." - ground out the ginger.  
"What?" - asked the brunette in unbelieving tone and then he sneered - "Have you been thinking about the line a lot? I must admit that I'm surprised how creative it was."  
Changkyun threw him a deadly glare and his cheeks were flushed but Kihyun ignored that.  
"Ok, stop this farce. I have no idea what do you want from me and I don't know if you have noticed but we have no time to waste. The concert, does that tell you anything?!" - he yelled again.  
All he wanted was the kid to be focused. Was that too much? Kihyun glanced at the clock. He sighed because they were supposed to finish the rehearsal already.  
"Look what you did!" - he continued to yell and pointed out at the clock - "I will give you a rough ride at the piano lesson." - he threatened him.  
Changkyun snorted.  
"What for? You're seriously the biggest prick I have ever known!" - the younger boy was so angry that he was trembling.  
Kihyun got up, went up to his bag and started to rifle through it. Finally, he took out some crumpled papers.  
"You'll play this." - he put those sheets on the piano.  
Changkyun glared at him again but after a moment of reluctance, he finally sat on the piano stool. He glanced at the papers and groaned.  
"You dick, you know well that I won't be able to do that!" - he whined.  
Kihyun made a wry face.  
"What? Do you want something easier? Why would I teach you then if you don't even want to advance? I can tell Miss Yoon that you don't want me to tutor you anymore." - he tried to threaten him.  
He seriously had enough of his behaviour that day. To his surprise, Changkyun sneered.  
"Fantastic! Go and tell her! I was thinking about that for weeks!" - he exclaimed - "But I'm sure that she won't say yes to that since you promised her to teach me."  
Kihyun sighed. This one time this stupid kid was right. There was no way in the hell that she will let them stop.  
"Fine." - he said with a poker face - "So stop whining and play it." - he pointed at the piano with his chin.  
The ginger muttered something under his breath but he couldn't understand a word so he just turned a deaf ear to that. He sat next to him and looked at him expectantly. Changkyun frowned. He still was hesitant for a moment but then he finally started to slowly move his fingers on the keyboard. The sheet music Kihyun gave him was one of his favourite pieces, Chopin's Nocturne in E-flat major, Op. 9, No. 2, and he really hoped that the younger male won't butcher it too much but at the same time he was almost sure that his hope was in vain. He purposefully gave him an extremely difficult piece. He wanted to put more pressure on him after he started to be even more disobedient than before. If Miss Yoon wanted Kihyun to teach that kid something he had to use more extreme measures. He stared at the ginger-haired boy as he struggled and suddenly something struck him. How could he not notice that before?  
"No, look." - he said out of the blue gripping Changkyun's wrist – "Your hand is in the wrong position all the time. You're going to harm your tendons if you keep playing like this." - he preached him and he took the younger guy's hand to adjust its position.  
The younger male's hand trembled as Kihyun was still gripping it tightly and he abruptly pulled the hand out of his grasp. He crossed his arms over his chest and started to persistently stare at the keyboard. Kihyun was speechless. He meant well. Why was the kid reacting so strangely? Finally, Changkyun turned his head in his direction.  
"Don't touch me, you asshole! Don't pretend that you don't remember!" - he yelled suddenly.  
He could see in his eyes that he was hurt. Kihyun gulped. His mouth was dry.  
"Remember what?" - he asked in low voice hoping that this gut feeling was wrong.  
Changkyun went silent and he didn't say anything for almost a minute. The ginger clenched his hands on his knees and his ears turned red.  
"Mr Son's Christmas party does that tell you anything?" - he asked finally after Kihyun pointedly cleared his throat.  
When the older male heard that he suddenly felt dizzy.  
"Yeah, that p-p-party, it was c-cool, so what?" - even though he tried to maintain a poker face he still started to stutter.  
Changkyun compressed his lips.  
"Do you ever think what others feel?!" - yelled the ginger suddenly - "No, you don't because you're a fucking egoist! First, you did that and then when we meet you act like nothing happened! I have enough! Why do you play with my feelings?!" - when he finally finished shouting, Changkyun was breathing hard.  
Kihyun sat with a frown on his face. The words stung. He was right. He rarely paid attention to others. And just a few minutes before he treated Changkyun like a piece of trash but now it was too late to clear everything up. He didn't know what to say. He really believed that he had kissed someone else.  
"I... I seriously didn't know that it was you..." - he stuttered out almost inaudibly.  
He stared at the piano because he had no courage to look at him. He heard Changkyun snort.  
"Why should I believe in your words?!" - he bridled - "I have a theory. You bet with somebody that you'll kiss me because it would be fun. You won and now you're playing dumb to get away with what you had done, am I right?" - he asked in a tone as if he was interrogating him.  
"No!" - he exclaimed staring at him with a pure shock on his face.  
Well, maybe Kihyun was an asshole but he would never do something like this on purpose.  
"I didn't do that! I know that what I did was wrong. But honestly, it never crossed my mind that it could be you who I k-kissed. I didn't do that on purpose and that's very embarrassing but I just got drunk and I don't even know why I did it. I was so drunk that I didn't remember much the next day." - he tried to explain and he looked up at the ginger because he wanted to see his reaction.  
He wanted the younger male to believe him. Kihyun had no courage to tell him the whole truth. He was afraid that he would hurt him even more if he told him that he did that just to make someone else jealous. However, he still hoped that he looked convincing. Changkyun persistently tried to avoid eye contact. Kihyun sighed.  
"I'm sincerely sorry. I doubt that you'll ever forgive me but I really didn't mean to do that. My brain decided for me and I have no idea why. I'm not gay or anything." - he added quickly.  
He wanted everything to be crystal clear. He wanted to avoid misunderstanding. Suddenly the freshman decided to look at him but his expression was very stern.  
"Oh, it just so happens that I am." - he said tonelessly.  
Kihyun froze. Oh, no. Why out of all the people that were at that party he had to kiss some gay dude? He seriously never thought how others could feel. No wonder that Changkyun was hurt. Maybe he had hoped for something more.  
"I-I... I'm s-sorry." - he stammered out the words once again but now he was almost certain that it won't change anything.  
The ginger looked away again.  
"Sorry." - parroted the younger one in low voice - "It's all words." - he whispered shaking his head - "I have to go. I'll come to the rehearsal tomorrow, I'll take part in the concert but after that, I don't want to see you ever again. Tomorrow I'll go to Miss Yoon." - he said taking his guitar case and his bag and walked out.  
Kihyun stared at his back as he was leaving the room. He didn't know what to do. Maybe it was all supposed to end like this? He fucked up. He felt like a piece of shit for treating him like that. Maybe it had to end this way for him to realise that he was a bad person. He was mean to everyone and he had more enemies than friends. Oh, yes, Changkyun was 100% right. No wonder he believed that he was capable of playing with someone else's feelings just for fun. Kihyun sat on the piano stool burying his face in his hands. He was in a gloomy mood after he realised how many wrong things he had done before.  
~*~  
When Changkyun got home that night he felt exhausted and heartbroken. He could have guessed that his confrontation with Kihyun just couldn't go well but he still felt hurt. There was no way for him to be prepared for that. He believed that the older male tried to trick him. Why couldn't he just say the whole truth to his face? He was a liar. "He did it just because he was drunk." Blah, blah. Bullshit! Changkyun laid down on his bed without even changing his clothes but he couldn't fall asleep even though he tried. When it was already 5 am, he just got up, took a shower and started to prepare for his classes.  
~*~  
The next morning Kihyun had his classes about copyright. He tried to focus on his teacher's words but his thoughts were meandering. He was still wondering if he could apologise to Changkyun somehow. He wanted to prove that he wasn't an asshole. It wasn't his purpose to use him after all. It was really a misunderstanding. He was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn't pay attention to anything around him. He just scribbled in his notebook not noticing that Hyungwon, with whom he sat at the same desk, was glancing at him worriedly all the time.  
"Mr Yoo," - said Dr Bae, their teacher - "can you remind me how long a work of art is protected by copyright? - she asked out of the blue.  
She wanted to keep her students focused.  
"Mr Yoo," - she repeated tapping her finger on his desk - "that was the most basic question I could ask you." - she said reproachfully - "Are you listening to me?" - she asked with her face only 10cm from Kihyun's face.  
When he noticed his reflection in her glasses he finally woke up from thought.  
"I-I..." - he stammered out.  
He had no idea what was going on. Everyone giggled and he looked around confused. Dr Bae took his notebook and looked through it. She read the last page slowly.  
"I should've told him." - she mouthed and looked narrowly at Kihyun - "Mr Yoo, where are your notes?" - she asked and he gulped - "Very bad, that's an F. That's the first time in ten years I had to remind someone about taking notes in my classes. I don't know what is going on but you'll come to my office hours next week to write a test about today's class material in order to make up for that F." - she explained staring at him the whole time and his classmates laughed - "Ok, now everyone focus." - she reprimanded them and continued her monologue.

After the class had finished Hyungwon, Minhyuk, Jooheon and Gunhee wouldn't let him live. They were following him around trying to find out what happened but it was in vain. Talking to his friends was now the last thing about which he thought at that moment. He walked out of the classroom trying to get rid of them but he suddenly stopped by its door. Next to the door was a timetable in a small frame which listed all the groups and subjects which were taught in this classroom on each day. Kihyun noticed that after their copyright class Changkyun's group had the history of culture in the same room. Suddenly he got a brilliant idea. Maybe that won't change anything but he had to try at least. He sat on the bench outside the classroom. He tore a page out of his notebook and started to write. Just when he finished he noticed that a lady with a pile of books and a mug tired to open the door of the classroom so he quickly got up and offered her help. When they entered the room he put her books on the teacher's desk and cleared his throat nervously.  
"Are you Mrs MacDougall?" - he asked shyly trying to recall the history of culture teacher's name.  
She stared at him surprised.  
"Yes." - she replied - "I'm sorry, but I only speak English." - she added quickly in that language.  
She had a very strong accent he had never heard before. Judging by her surname he believed that she probably was Scottish and he got even more nervous since his English was poor. He bit his lips hoping that she would understand him.  
"I w-want to give this..." - he stuttered showing the folded piece of paper he had torn out of his notebook to her - "to someone you teach."  
"Excuse me?" - she asked frowning.  
"I want to give this letter to one of your students." - he repeated - "To Im Changkyun." - he added thinking that maybe this time she would understand.  
"Oh, to Im Changkyun? Yes, I do teach him. All right, I can do it." - she replied quickly and Kihyun had to focus very hard - "What's your name?" - she asked.  
"Oh, no, no, no." - he said frantically shaking his head - "Please, don't tell him my name. It's signed." - he added smiling wryly.  
The teacher nodded and promised to give it to him. When Kihyun left the classroom he sighed with relief. Ugh, so much stress. He realised that he had only three minutes until his next class started so he rushed through the hallway hoping that he'll be on time.

Changkyun arrived just in time for his first classes that day and when he entered his classroom his teacher and all his classmates were already there. He excused even though he wasn't late and quickly sat next to Yoonho. To his horror, the teacher approached their desk.  
"M-Mrs M-MacDougall..." - he stammered out - "I'm sorry, but I'm not late."  
Surprisingly, the teacher smiled.  
"Yes, I know. It's ok. I just have something for you." - she said taking out a folded piece of paper out of the book she had in her hands - "Someone told me to give that to you."  
Changkyun took it and then stared at it for a few seconds. His heart was beating hard in his chest. What could it be?  
"Ooh, what is it?" - asked Yoonho trying to snatch the note out of his hand.  
"That's none of your business!" - he hissed.  
He had a feeling that it was something that no one but him was supposed to see. He decided not to read it in the classroom so he hid it in his jeans pocket.  
"Maybe that's a love letter?" - asked his classmate with a sly smile and flushed cheeks.  
Changkyun threw him a dubious look.  
"In January?!" - he exclaimed in disbelief.  
Yoonho giggled.  
"Yes, early Valentine's Day." - he gasped out in between his giggles.  
The ginger-haired boy facepalmed himself.  
"Aha, Mrs MacDougall gave me a Valentine's Day's card in January." - he said rolling his eyes.  
"Why not?" - asked Yoonho with this stupid smile still plastered on his face.  
"Guys, please be quiet!" - reprimanded them the teacher.  
Changkyun shook his head in disbelief. Why was Yoonho so dumb?

He was too scared to open the letter so that he gained the courage to do it just moments before his last rehearsal with Kihyun. He sat on a bench frantically looking around to be extra certain that he was alone. The note said:  
"You can call me an asshole, you can call me a chicken. But I just want everything to be clear between us even if you'll hate me for that. You have the right to hate me. I want to tell you exactly why I did what I did. I didn't tell you the whole truth because I was scared. At the party, I got drunk because I saw my ex with someone else. I felt extremely jealous and I wanted her to be jealous as well so I decided to kiss the first person that I'll find standing under the mistletoe. And it so happened that it was you. But I truly don't remember that. I don't remember anything except the fact that I did it. I tried to find out who I kissed but no one had seen us, even my ex. I wanted to apologise for the last time no matter if you will forgive me or not. As I said before, you have the right to be angry, you have the right to hate me because what I did was wrong. I didn't mean to hurt anyone but I did. I'm sorry. YKH."  
He stared at the inked words not knowing how to feel anymore. He was considering crumpling the paper but he changed his mind at the last moment. His eyes prickled and he wasn't sure if it was from the lack of sleep. He sighed heavily but at the same time, he recalled that he should go to the rehearsal before Kihyun murders him. He glanced at his watch and it was already time. He panicked and quickly rushed downstairs. As he charged into the room he noticed that the brunette was sitting on the piano stool staring at him as if he just saw a ghost. Changkyun stood upright.  
"Hi, you asshole and chicken." - he greeted him in low voice not looking away from his face.  
The older male gulped and seemed to be very nervous.  
"Very nice letter you wrote." - he added not changing his tone of voice.  
Kihyun slouched and looked down.  
"Let's suppose that I believe you now." - when he said that the older male glanced at him with hope in his eyes - "And I'll try to somehow cooperate with you for the sake of our performance. And I don't hate you. I couldn't even force myself to do so." - he added in a lower voice.  
Kihyun sighed.  
"That's good." - he whispered - "I don't hate you... anymore." - he added and Changkyun stared at him in shock - "Yes, I used to hate you." - he repeated sternly - "But I'm glad that you made me realise that I treated others wrong." - he said shyly and unexpectedly he blushed - "I'm sorry, that sounds stupid."  
Changkyun giggled softly at the sight. For the first time ever he felt that Kihyun was actually sincere.  
"Ok, maybe let's practice before the awkwardness will gulf us both." - he said quickly.  
They prepared everything and did as they said. They had a long evening ahead of them. It was 5 pm and as they were told they could stay in the practice room until 9 pm, the time when the door of the university building was supposed to be closed. So they rehearsed the piece. They repeated various parts hundreds of times first separately and then together. They wanted to have everything polished. The stress kicked in and they both started to feel the pressure. Changkyun played his arrangement and they listened to it God knows how long. At one point Kihyun suddenly realised that they probably had little time left until 9 pm and indeed, they had only half an hour left. The piece was playing in loop and Kihyun slowly had enough. He turned around to Changkyun because he wanted him to turn it off and he suddenly realised that the boy fell asleep resting his head on his hand.  
"Changkyun?" - he whispered shaking his arms - "Don't sleep!"  
"Mmm?" - the ginger murmured something but he was still asleep.  
Kihyun facepalmed himself.  
"Oh, no, what to do?" - murmured the brunette to himself and he took Changkyun's phone and to his relief, he managed to turn the music off.  
He hoped that maybe it will make him wake up but he still didn't even budge. Kihyun compressed his lips staring at the sleeping boy. He must have been very tired. Maybe they practised too much?  
"Hey, kid, get up!" - moaned the brunette shaking him again.  
Now the ginger finally opened his eyes but he still seemed to be very sleepy.  
"Changkyun, get up or else they will lock us up here!" - he urged him.  
He had lost this half an hour on trying to wake him up. The younger one got up very slowly and took all of his belongings. Kihyun did the same and the walked out after he double-checked if everything was all right. The brunette noticed that Changkyun was very slow and that he walked dragging his feet.  
"How long did you sleep last night?" - he asked him as they walked outside the building but he received no response.  
Kihyun went to the parking lot but suddenly he stopped after he noticed that Changkyun followed him there. He always thought that the boy didn't have a car since they never met here.  
"What?" - he asked softly - "Do you want me to drive you home or what?" - he realised that maybe it would be mean to tell a half-asleep boy to use the public transport at this time.  
Changkyun stared at him clearly confused. Kihyun gestured to his car and the younger boy reluctantly nodded his head. The brunette sat in the driver's seat and waited for Changkyun to get in.  
"So where do you live?" - he asked him after started the engine and when he turned around he realised that the ginger fell asleep again.  
The brunette cursed under his breath. How was it possible to fell asleep so quickly was he really that tired? What was he supposed to do in that case? It was extremely awkward but because he couldn't wake him up he decided to drive him to his own house. His flat wasn't very small since he already lived with his flatmate so maybe he will find some spot for Changkyun where he could sleep. He just hoped that the kid won't accuse him of kidnapping in the morning or something but he had no better idea.  
~*~  
The next morning Changkyun woke up sore. He grunted as he rolled over and he suddenly opened his eyes because he sniffed that someone was frying food. Maybe he forgot to close his window and he sniffed his neighbours' breakfast? After his sight adjusted to the brightness, he was surprised to wake up in a place he had never seen before. His pulse started to accelerate. Where was he? He realised that he was laying on some kind of a couch and that he was covered with two blankets and he was still wearing the same clothes as yesterday. He looked around the room. It was a tiny living room with just this one couch, a coffee table, a TV, a bookcase and a cluttered desk with a computer on top. There were two doorways: one on the opposite wall which led to a corridor and second on the right through which he could see a kitchen. He could see someone's feet as they walked around the kitchen. He heard all kinds of shuffling and noises from the room and after a few minutes Kihyun showed up in the living room's doorway.  
"Oh, you woke up?" - asked him the brunette in surprised tone - "I made breakfast." - he added and Changkyun noticed that he was holding two plates.  
He stared at Kihyun in shock.  
"What am I doing here?" - he asked but suddenly his stomach rumbled.  
He blushed as he realised that he was hungry.  
"Ugh..." - murmured the older male - "I was supposed to drive you home but you fell asleep before you told me where you live." - he said rolling his eyes.  
Changkyun's blush deepened.  
"Oh, my God. I'm sorry. That must have been so awkward."  
He never realised that he was so tired.  
"Indeed." - stated the brunette - "You can't even imagine how embarrassed I was. Maybe let's not talk about it." - he added putting the plates on the coffee table - "I don't have a dining room, so move because I also have to sit somewhere."  
Changkyun quickly moved the blankets aside and sat straight making space for Kihyun just next to him.  
"It's scrambled eggs." - added the brunette when he noticed that the younger male glanced at the plate.  
"Oh, it looks good." - he replied gulping.  
He was hesitant and Kihyun frowned.  
"You can eat, I'm not going to poison you or something." - he said gesturing at the plate and Changkyun nodded.  
After that, they both were silent because they started to eat. He seriously didn't even realise how hungry he was. When they almost finished the younger one spoke.  
"Wow, you cook really well." - he said glancing at him - "I don't remember the last time I ate something so tasty."  
Kihyun snorted.  
"Stop it! It's just scrambled eggs. Everyone can make it!" - he exclaimed.  
Changkyun rolled his eyes. It would be better if he just accepted the compliment.  
"But it's seriously good!" - he assured him.  
"Ok, that's great, thank you." - mumbled Kihyun extremely quickly - "But now go do the dishes, kid. The kitchen is here." - he said gesturing at the doorway - "Please." - he added quickly after Changkyun glared at him.  
The ginger did what he said because he was an unexpected guest in this house, after all.

After he had done the dishes he came back to the living room and found Kihyun sitting on the couch scrolling mindlessly through his phone. He stood in the doorway because he didn't know what to do with himself anymore. Finally, Kihyun looked up and stared at him confused.  
"Maybe I should go?" - he asked shyly - "I've already worn out your welcome."  
"As you like." - replied the brunette - "But we start the dress rehearsal at 3 pm and it's 12 am right now so I don't know if it wouldn't be better if we went there together. I don't know where you live but I doubt you'll get there on time." - he noted.  
Changkyun contemplated his words for a while and after that, he nodded. Kihyun was right. What if he would be late? He couldn't be late for the dress rehearsal. However, he still felt shy and awkward. They had never spent time together doing something else than practising. It was a very weird situation. He sat on the edge of the couch because Kihyun took most of the space already.  
"Kihyun?" - he had said his name because he wanted him to pay attention to what he was about to say - "I just wanted to tell you that I'm glad that you wrote that letter. It really did explain a lot. I judged you wrong." - he said in low voice.  
When he glanced at the older male he noticed that he seemed to be in complete shock. He just sat straight with his mouth gaped like a goldfish. Maybe Kihyun was even too stunned because he never replied. Oh, my God. Was it too much? Great, he should thank himself for making everything ten times more awkward. They didn't say anything for such a long time that Changkyun started to feel drowsy again. He yawned but he tried not to fall asleep. How could he still be tried after he had slept God knows how long last night? He had probably put too much pressure on himself again. He recalled that moment when he ended up in hospital after he overworked himself a couple of months before. Never again. His eyelids were getting heavy and he couldn't help it anymore.  
"Kihyun, can you move please?" - he whined - "I want to lay down." - and before Kihyun even had time to reply Changkyun's head dropped to the couch.  
He already had no strength to even sit properly.

Kihyun, however, didn't manage to move and the ginger's head ended up on his lap. He sat up straight and tense. He was afraid to do anything so he just stayed as he was before. He was scared that he would hurt him if he moved at that moment. He wanted to say something but no words would come out. He was too shocked to do anything. He breathed shallowly but at the same time, he hoped that the younger boy wouldn't notice that. Kihyun glanced at Changkyun's face. His eyes were shut and his dark eyelashes contrasted with the fair skin of his cheeks. He looked very peaceful. How could he bother someone who looked like that? He was confused. He couldn't understand his own reaction. He should do something but he wasn't able to push himself to do that. It made no sense. Somehow he couldn't take his eyes off the younger male's face. Kihyun could feel his heart beat hard in his chest. He felt a sudden urge to touch the younger boy's hair. It looked so fluffy when its curls were falling down on his forehead. Oh, God. He was embarrassed with his own thoughts. Now he was very conscious of each beat of his heart and the blood pulsating in his veins. He reached his hand but it froze mid-air. He was incredibly nervous. What if he will make a false step? But then he realised that they were already quite close and the younger male didn't even budge. He finally got his nerve up and decided to do that. He ruffled his ginger locks. After he didn't get any violent response he continued to stroke the fringe of his hair earning a small smile from Changkyun. He felt his guts tighten and his face got incredibly hot. He knew that he was blushing madly. At that moment Changkyun opened his eyes reminding that he wasn't asleep.  
"You're cute." - the younger boy chuckled and Kihyun never thought that his heart could go any crazier but it did - "You should've seen your face. You're so flushed." - he added with a sly smile.  
Did he just call him cute? He never thought that he would ever hear that in his life. His heart was about to jump out of his chest. His legs started to tremble slightly and he couldn't be more obvious.  
"Are you going to sleep there?" - he asked with panic in his voice - "Do I look like a pillow?"  
He didn't know what to say. His brain wasn't functioning anymore.  
"Yes and yes." - replied Changkyun with a smug smile.  
Kihyun gasped. This kid! Why was he so rude all of a sudden? But he was even more shocked with his own reactions because he still did nothing just continued to stare at him until Changkyun opened his eyes and now he stared at Kihyun as well. Suddenly they heard a door slam and before they had time to react Kihyun's flatmate, Hoseok entered the corridor. Shit. Kihyun totally forgot that he will come back from his shift eventually. Hoseok took his shoes off and headed to the living room completely oblivious to the existence of the two of them. He noticed them only when he threw his bag on the floor. He froze staring at them and Changkyun sat up as quickly as he could. They both tried to act naturally but it didn't work at all. Hoseok cleared his throat awkwardly.  
"Sorry." - he blurted out and charged to the kitchen.  
Kihyun and Changkyun stared at themselves in horror. After he managed to calm down a bit Kihyun decided to go to the kitchen to clear everything up.  
"I'm sorry that I interrupted you in whatever you were doing." - said Hoseok just as he walked into the room - "Nice bae you have." - he stated with 'I know it all smile'.  
Kihyun gritted his teeth. He hated that word and he hated when people were making assumptions.  
"He's not my..." - he wanted to defend himself but Hoseok cut him in.  
"Uh-huh. Right." - his flatmate nodded and rolled his eyes.  
The brunette sighed feeling defeated and came back to the living room. He sat on the couch with his arms crossed. Changkyun glanced at him worriedly but he didn't know what to say. After a few minutes, Hoseok entered the room with a sandwich.  
"Hello." - Changkyun decided to greet him out of the blue.  
"Oh, hi." - replied Hoseok after he swallowed the bite he was chewing at that moment - "We already know each other, right?" - he asked and after Changkyun nodded he smiled and walked away again.  
Kihyun frowned. Did they know each other? Wasting no time he followed his flatmate to the corridor and he caught him just before he managed to enter his room.  
"Where do you know him from?" - he asked dryly.  
Hoseok snorted.  
"What, are you jealous?"  
"I'm the one asking questions! And I'm not jealous." - he said sternly.  
His flatmate shook his head.  
"Why you're asking me?" - he moaned - "Go ask your boyfriend! I just came back from my shift, let me live!" - and before he had time to do something Hoseok already slammed the door of his room.  
Kihyun felt hopeless. Everything went wrong. Suddenly he heard Changkyun call his name so he came back to the living room.  
"Kihyun, I know it's not the right moment, but we have only two hours to the rehearsal and I don't know how long it takes to get to the university from here." - he said now clearly stressed out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N:] Omg, this chapter is like a damn sinusoid and I hope that I didn't kill you with all the feels. I know that their 'moment' was a bit sudden but I had it in mind for a very long time, so yeah, enjoy.


	7. The Winter Concert

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N:] I know that I didn't update for quite a long time but I struggled with this chapter A LOT. It was so hard to write and I was very unhappy with some of its parts and I was editing them like 10 times ;-; But yeah I've finally managed.

Suddenly he heard Changkyun call his name so he came back to the living room.  
"Kihyun, I know it's not the right moment, but we have only two hours to the rehearsal and I don't know how long it takes to get to the university from here." - he said now clearly stressed out.  
Kihyun entered the room and sighed.  
"Don't worry. We still have about half an hour but we have to prepare before we go." - he said glancing at Changkyun.  
He was concerned because it seemed that the younger boy had already started to freak out before the dress rehearsal.  
"I'm going to change my clothes." - he added gesturing in the corridor's direction - "Wait." - he said suddenly when a horrified expression showed up on the younger male's face.  
They were supposed to come to the rehearsal wearing formal clothes as Mr Son told them on the most recent rehearsal and Changkyun was still in the same clothes as yesterday. They stared at each other for a while in silence.  
"Ok, come with me. I can borrow you something. I'll try to find some clothes that will fit you." - he suggested because he was truly worried.  
He wanted to show that they had been working very hard and that they were both professionalists. He didn't want something as stupid an improper dress to undermine their image. Changkyun stared at him in shock.  
"A-are you s-serious?" - he stuttered - "You seriously want to do that? You're not joking?"  
Kihyun compressed his lips.  
"Yes, I'm not joking. I don't want Mr Son to yell at us because you're wearing... this." - he said gesturing to the plaid flannel shirt and ripped jeans he was wearing.  
"Hey, what's wrong with it?!" - exclaimed Changkyun.  
Kihyun frowned even more. Why this kid had to be offended by everything he said?  
"Nothing, it's just unsuitable for this situation." - he replied in grave tone - "And calm down, I'm trying to help you if you haven't noticed."  
The ginger nodded but his unhappy expression didn't change. They went to the corridor and Kihyun took Changkyun to his bedroom. When they entered the room the brunette immediately opened the wardrobe. He quickly looked through its content and took out two or three suits and shirts.  
"I can't borrow you this one because I'm going to wear it." - he said putting one of the sets of clothes aside - "But let's see the rest. Will that even fit you?" - he added with a frown and turned around.  
He scanned Changkyun's body frame and the younger boy fidgeted nervously because of how intensely he was staring at him.  
"Wait." - said Kihyun suddenly - "Are we the same height?" - he was surprised that he didn't notice that before and he stood opposite him and tried to measure him with his hand.  
Changkyun pouted.  
"No. I'm sure that I'm taller." - he said crossing his arms.  
Kihyun kept touching his own and Changkyun's heads trying to see if there is any difference and then he suddenly laughed.  
"Wow, we're really the same height!" - he exclaimed and the ginger pouted even more - "Why are you sulking, kid?" - he asked in unbelieving tone - "At least you can wear it!"  
Changkyun sighed but after a few seconds, he nodded.  
"Ok, so I'll wear that one and you can choose either of those two." - he explained taking the suit he chose.  
Suddenly, they heard someone giggle. They turned around and at the threshold stood Hoseok.  
"Aww, how cute, you're exchanging clothes." - he cooed.  
The younger boy stared at Hoseok clearly shocked and flustered at the same time.  
"Could you please mind your own business?" - Kihyun glared at him hoping that it will make him go away - "You told me to leave you alone because you're tired. Shouldn't you be sleeping?"  
"What do you mean? I just passed by your room and you didn't close the door so what's the problem?" - his flatmate just shrugged and smiled wryly.  
"Just stop bothering us." - he said glaring at him again - "Changkyun, have you chosen something? I'm going to the bathroom to change and you can do that here." - he spoke to the younger boy deciding to ignore his nosy flatmate from now on.  
Hoseok chuckled.  
"What? Are you embarrassed to change next to your boyfriend?" - he asked with a cheeky smile.  
Kihyun gasped.  
"What do you not understand in the sentence 'he is not my boyfriend'?!" - he bridled - "I'm not going to change with him being in the same room and I'm not going to watch him change."  
"Oh, yes, now I understand!" - exclaimed his flatmate clearly exaggerating his reaction - "So, can I look at him?" - he asked wiggling his eyebrow.  
"NO!" - yelled the brunette completely shook by his words.  
"See? I told you that you're jealous!" - the man clapped his hands pleased with himself.  
"Ok, just stop it." - Changkyun spoke for the first time since Hoseok entered the room - "I don't care if Kihyun is jealous or not but you won't see more than me rolling up my sleeve at the doctor's." - he added with a stern look.  
Hoseok gaped. Kihyun was shocked as well. He was surprised that the younger one suddenly reacted so harshly.  
"Oh my God, Hoseok, it has nothing to do with me being jealous, you're just acting like a total perv." - he blurted out.  
"Are you saying such things to your patients as well? No wonder that there aren't many male nurses if they act like that." - Changkyun seemed to be really angry - "I hope that I'll never come across you at your shift when I'll have to go to the hospital."  
Hoseok just kept staring at him not knowing how to reply.  
"Ok, I think it's time you went away." - Kihyun suddenly spoke and tried to push his flatmate out of the room because he didn't budge.  
When he finally left the brunette turned around to Changkyun.  
"Wait, were you in the hospital where he works? Were you sick?" - he asked in a low voice - "But you are ok now, right?"  
The ginger looked up at him with a surprised expression.  
"Yes, it was a long time ago. Now I'm fine. What, are you worried?" - he asked with a smirk.  
Kihyun cleared his throat awkwardly.  
"W-well... I don't want you to faint on the rehearsal or something." - he stammered out.  
"Oh my God, the rehearsal!" - exclaimed the younger one palming his face - "Quickly, let's change before we will be late!"  
The brunette nodded frantically and walked out of the room. After a few minutes, he came back and knocked on the bedroom door.  
"Changkyun, have you finished? Can I go in?" - he asked and when he heard a yes he walked in.  
As he stepped into the room the younger boy froze. Kihyun frowned.  
"What? Is something wrong?" - he asked in surprised tone looking down at his legs and smoothing his trousers.  
Changkyun gulped still staring at him and muttered something inarticulately. He couldn't take his eyes off Kihyun's body. The way his torso looked in the tight-fitting light pink shirt made his mind go totally blank. The navy suit fitted him perfectly and it just had to be tailored.  
"What?" - he repeated still not understanding what the younger one wanted from him.  
"I-I..." - he stuttered - "How to say that without sounding gay..." - he whispered to himself - "You look good." - he blurted out and looked away.  
"Too late because that already sounded gay." - said the older boy and laughed - "But thank you." - he added quickly because Changkyun glared at him.  
Suddenly they felt very awkward and they both flushed. After a moment, Kihyun cleared his throat.  
"Ok, I think that we really should go now." - he said looking at his watch.  
"Yeah, right..." - started the younger boy - "But I have one problem. Are those shoes ok?" - he asked raising his left foot for him to see.  
It was bright purple sneakers. Kihyun stared.  
"Er..." - he murmured - "There is nothing that we can do about that at this moment... Maybe no one will notice? But if someone does just tell them that it's your sense of fashion." - he added laughing.  
Changkyun grinned.  
"Oh, that's a great idea! No one can question my fashion sense!" - he exclaimed and gesticulated to his outfit and smiled proudly.  
"But don't forget that it was me who borrowed you those clothes!" - joked the brunette winking at him.

They didn't say anything more after that and they just left the flat and the apartment block and headed to the parking lot. They got into Kihyun's car and he started to drive. They were silent for a long moment and Kihyun was deeply in his thoughts. Changkyun stared at him because he wondered what he was thinking about. The older male seemed to be concerned with something. Just as the ginger-haired boy wanted to ask him about that the brunette spoke.  
"Changkyun?" - he asked to check if the ginger was listening to him - "If anyone will ask why we came to school together today just tell them that I drove you to school because your bus broke and I just accidentally noticed you walking on the side of a road." - he said.  
Changkyun frowned and then snorted.  
"What?" - he asked in unbelieving tone - "Why did you come up with such a ridiculous idea? Do I really have to say that? Do you want me to lie? Why can't I just tell the truth?" - he bombarded him with questions.  
Kihyun clenched his hands on the steering wheel.  
"Do you even hear yourself?" - he ground out - "What? Do you want to tell people that you slept over at my house? Can't you see how ambiguously it sounds? Maybe you will go around and tell others that you were lying on my... Ok, I can't anymore." - he murmured more to himself than to Changkyun.  
The ginger looked through the window not wanting to respond to that. It wasn't that he wanted everyone to know what they did and start to make assumptions just like Kihyun's flatmate because that was what they would definitely do if they knew, he just really hated lies. And he knew that trying to pretend that he hadn't been to Kihyun's house if someone asked him about that would be almost impossible. He was a terrible liar. There were hundreds of things which could go wrong and betray his true thoughts. He just couldn't pretend. And on top of that, he couldn't understand why Kihyun was so ashamed of what they had done. After all, it was him who started to caress his hair out of the blue just a few hours before and it was him who initiated the kiss. Kihyun had already told him that he was straight but his actions were contradicting his words and it puzzled him. When the older male acted like that it hurt his feelings. He wanted everything to be less complicated.  
"As you like it." - he finally said in a grave tone.  
He agreed but he would do anything to be able to speak about those things that were burdening him.  
After that the atmosphere became tense and they didn't speak any more until they got to the university building.

They entered the building and without a word, they just parted their ways and each of them went up to his own friends as if everything was as usual. No one even noticed that they came together. When Changkyun reached Yoonho and Seokwon the two boys smiled. When he saw them, he started to wonder if they were as nervous as him but to his surprise, they both seemed very calm. The two friends were going to perform together and he was curious what they had come up with since Seokwon was very talented and had a lot of potential and Yoonho was one of the poorest students in his class. Well, he himself, unfortunately, was probably on almost the same level as the latter of the classmates. He greeted them and since they still had some time before the rehearsal was supposed to begin they started to talk.  
"How are you?" - asked Yoonho with a wry smile - "Nervous before the final rehearsal?"  
Changkyun smiled back awkwardly.  
"Could be worse." - he replied but he felt that he started to tremble slightly.  
"Where is your partner? Shouldn't you two be waiting together?" - asked Seokwon looking around as if the second half of Changkyun's duo could appear out of nowhere any second.  
The ginger-haired boy cleared his throat. He totally forgot that he never told them who he was supposed to perform with. Not that he felt the need to do so.  
"Oh, he just went to meet with his friends. We don't really like each other, you know." - he said dryly compressing his lips.  
The two boys exchanged looks.  
"Why are you performing together then?" - asked Yoonho with a frown.  
"Mr Son made us do so because we were the last two people left." - he replied kicking his heels nervously.  
He was ashamed that he was such a loser that he didn't manage to choose his own project partner. His classmates laughed loudly and some people who were next to them turned around to check what was happening.  
"Oh my God, Changkyun, you're slow." - said Yoonho in a muffled voice because he couldn't stop laughing - "Anyway, who is he?" - he asked curiously after a few seconds when he managed to calm down a bit.  
"Oh, it's the pianist." - he said blandly.  
Yoonho and Seokwon gaped.  
"L-like THE pianist? That black-haired senior with the resting bitch face?" - stuttered out Seokwon still staring at him in shock.  
Changkyun cracked up because it was the most accurate description of Kihyun he had ever heard.  
"Yeah, it's him." - he gasped out when he finally stopped laughing.  
"Jesus, he's scary as fuck. He seems to hate everyone and everything." - added Seokwon and looked around in panic - "But still, even if you don't like each other you're in better position than us because, as you remember, I was supposed to do this with that Sohyun who plays the flute but she dropped out of the university in November so I quickly asked Mr Son, if Yoonho can be my partner even though he's not in the orchestra and fortunately he agreed." - he explained quickly.  
Changkyun totally forgot that they weren't supposed to perform together at first so he just stared.  
"Wow, I-I really admire you for being able to deal with that situation." - he stuttered out.  
"Oh, by the way," - Yoonho jumped in suddenly - "I don't know if you have noticed but your jacket doesn't fit you in the waist." - he said gesturing to his torso.  
The ginger frowned.  
"Thank you very much for pointing that out." - he deadpanned - "I know! I realised at the last moment that the suit I wanted to wear was dirty so I had to wash it and I wore this one even though it doesn't fit well." - he said that a bit too nervously but he hoped that he still sounded convincing.  
Kihyun would kill him if he spilt the beans. When he said that sentence his heart started to beat extremely fast. He knew that he wasn't a good liar. However, to his surprise, the boys nodded understandingly. Suddenly Yoonho and Seokwon froze. Mr Son finally entered the auditorium but he wasn't alone. He walked into the room with a young, tanned, dark-haired woman who held a thick notebook. His heartbeat accelerated even more even though it already beat fast. Who was she and why was she there?  
"Hello, kids." - said Mr Son blankly.  
The only thing that made Changkyun feel a bit better was that the conductor decided to wear a suit as well.  
"Today I'm going to check your progress on your projects so everyone will leave the auditorium and I will call each pair separately and at random. There will be no evaluation. I just want to see how prepared you are." - when he said that the all the people groaned.  
Changkyun stared in shock. How did the benevolent, young teacher suddenly come up with such a terrifying idea? He would never expect him to do something like this. He wasn't prepared. He suddenly felt very dizzy.  
"But before we'll do that I have an announcement for you. So, I won't be the only person who will be listening to you today. Our guest member of the jury is Miss Kim Hyojung and probably some of you already know her because she teaches singing." - he continued.  
Changkyun never heard about her but he noticed that the platinum blonde guy who he assumed to be called Minhyuk hid behind Hyungwon as soon as they heard that she will be listening to them. He gulped. Oh, my God. Was the woman scary? Who was she? When Mr Son finished talking everything happened very quickly. Everyone left leaving the first two 'victims' inside the auditorium alone with Mr Son and Miss Kim. Changkyun couldn't focus. Everything was like a blur. He didn't remember how he walked out of the room and how it happened that now Kihyun was sitting with him on a bench outside the auditorium. They were both very quiet and the brunette didn't speak a word. He waited and waited and the group of people who were waiting was becoming smaller and smaller. Only when there were about ten people left Miss Kim called them inside. Changkun stood up reluctantly and he felt that his legs were trembling. He glanced at the older boy. To his surprise, he seemed very calm and determined. He felt the burning sensation of envy. How did he manage to be so collected in such a situation? He was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn't realise that Kihyun was staring at him as well. Out of the blue, the older boy walked up to him and squeezed his arm. Changkyun turned his face to him shocked with the sudden gesture.  
"Let's go, it'll be ok." - whispered the brunette to him and pushed his back to make him move.

After 10 minutes they left the room. Changkyun was glad that it was finally over but he didn't know what to say. They played the piece, Mr Son and Miss Kim just stared at them occasionally scribbling something in their notebooks and when the boys finished playing they just nodded their heads and thanked them not giving any opinion. He really wondered what was even the point of the whole audition like thing. He glanced at Kihyun and the older boy had still the same expression as before. Changkyun frowned. Was he a robot or what? Did he feel no emotions? It really puzzled him because he was already weak in the knees and it was just the dress rehearsal. He wanted to ask him how he felt but before Changkyun had a chance to even open his mouth Kihyun excused himself saying that he has to go home. The ginger started at his back as the brunette walked down the hallway and after a few minutes he decided to go home as well. He felt a bit disappointed that they couldn't at least walk out of the building together.  
~*~  
The next day was the big day. It was 10 am and all of the instrumentalists were supposed to arrive at the Philharmonic Hall three hours before the concert. Changkyun entered the hall of the building shivering from the cold and the nervousness. He looked around to see if Kihyun was already there but among all the people who were crowded in the hallway the only familiar faces that he had noticed were Hyungwon and Minhyuk. They were standing next to the ticket counter. He walked up to them and as he did so, the woman behind the counter smiled at him when she noticed that he was carrying a guitar case with him. He smiled back at her but he was so nervous that it only looked like a twist. He flushed and he decided to talk to those two males.  
"Hi." - he greeted them shyly - "Have you seen Kihyun? And shouldn't we go to the recital hall already?" - he asked immediately because the only thing he could think about was the concert.  
All he wanted to do was to meet with his project partner and get the performance over but he knew that they had still at least a few hours to their performance and it filled him with dread.  
"Kihyun?" - repeated the tall brunette - "He probably already went to the hall to practice or to try the piano out or something. You should already know well what he is like." - replied Hyungwon raising his eyebrow.  
Changkyun nodded his head. Right, he could have guessed that. Kihyun was always overly diligent and he had noticed it the first day they met. But this day Changkyun just couldn't think properly. He was too concerned with the nearing concert.  
"Ok..." - he replied slowly - "So I think I'll go and look for him." - he added and left them as quickly as he could.  
God, when the nightmare of waiting will finally be over? He didn't remember being so stressed out ever before. Even his end of school exams were less scary. He went upstairs following the arrows which showed the direction to the recital hall and when he finally found it he entered the room. He knew that there weren't any concerts taking place at this moment because the whole Philharmonic Hall was reserved for the University of Music until the evening. And as Kihyun's friends were expecting he found him there. He stood on the stage examining the piano. It was one of the very few immobile instruments so he had to deal with the piano which was already there. Changkyun went up to the stage and cleared his throat loudly. When he did so Kihyun jumped in fear.  
"Oh, my God! It's you." - he exclaimed clutching his chest - "You almost gave me a heart attack! I thought that you were Mr Son and that he would yell at me for entering the hall so early."  
Changkyun stared at him feeling a bit sorry for scaring him. He was surprised that this day the brunette seemed way more stressed than the day before.  
"Yeah, don't worry, it's just me." - he said blandly not really knowing how to react.  
"Great, Mr Just Me, but I don't know if you have noticed but I have to quickly check the piano out and then leave before the audience will start to gather." - he replied coolly.  
Changkyun gulped. Oh, shit. Kihyun really was in a totally different mood than the day before and it didn't help him at all. He just nodded and left the recital hall. He had no other option because the older male clearly didn't want Changkyun to bother him. When he walked out to the hallway next to the recital hall he started to walk around it nervously. He couldn't help it. There was no one who could help him to feel a bit more confident and the waiting was killing him. He knew that he and Kihyun will be the 4th duo that day and he started doubting whether he will manage to wait that long. He wanted to run away before the concert even started.

It was 12.30 pm and Shin Hoseok entered the Philharmonic Hall with his friend Kwangji. He felt extremely excited. He was waiting for that concert since the day when he saw the poster. Even though he loved helping others as well as his job, it was very demanding and stressful and he needed some entertainment in his life. He couldn't think about poor victims of accidents 24/7. That's why he was really anticipating the concert even though classical music wasn't his favourite music genre.  
"Kwangji, can you believe that one of the musicians is my flatmate? Can you believe that I know someone as talented as him?" - he asked his friend in an eager tone.  
The brown-haired man rolled his eyes.  
"Yes, Hoseok, I heard that at least 20 times today." - he whined - "And you speak of him as if he was the next Paganini or something."  
"Well, almost!" - he said and his eyes were glistening - "I was so shocked when I heard him play for the first time. You can imagine how angry I was when I learnt that my flatmate is a musician. I thought that he will be sawing away day and night but I was wrong. He really knows how to play and after some time I got used to him playing like 5 hours a day."  
The other man stared at him.  
"Why do you even need to come here then if you hear him play 5 hours a day, every day." - he said raising his eyebrow.  
Hoseok sighed loudly.  
"Kwangji!" - he ground out - "You act as if I forced you to come here. I want to remind you that I paid for your ticket so you could be a little more enthusiastic."  
"I would be way more enthusiastic if you didn't spoil everything by babbling about your brilliant flatmate every ten seconds." - he deadpanned.  
"Alright." - replied Hoseok blandly.  
"Wait, but there is something that you started telling me and you never finished." - Kwangji suddenly stopped mid-step and turned his head in his friend's direction.  
"Really?" - asked the nurse in a surprised tone.  
"Yes, you told me that Kihyun brought his project partner over to your house and that you walked in on them doing something weird." - reminded him the brown-haired man.  
"Oh, you're right, I got distracted and I forgot to finish that." - he said also stopping - "So listen, I saw the other guy laying on his lap."  
Kwangji stared.  
"Maybe they're boyfriends." - he said with a frown.  
"Yes! That's what I think but Kihyun won't admit. And also he used to have a fiancée and I knew her and it just doesn't add up." - Hoseok seemed to be almost equally excited about the news as about the concert.  
Kwangji compressed his lips but then he laughed.  
"Ok, I see. But also I can see Kihyun's point. He probably doesn't want to tell you the truth because you're a damn gossip." - he said after he stopped laughing.  
"I'm not a gossip!" - exclaimed the former man.  
"You're not? Soon everyone will know what you saw." - the brown-haired man sent him a dubious look.  
"I swear I won't tell anyone else!" - he bridled but he calmed down in a matter of seconds - "Hey, but do you know that the kid I saw Kihyun with was in our hospital one day?"  
"No, I don't." - said Kwangji with fake interest - "Ok, that's very fascinating but we have to hurry because the concert will start soon."  
The first bell started ringing and they were still wearing coats. Hoseok nodded and they rushed to the dressing room.

Hoseok and Kwangji entered the recital hall literally 5 minutes before the start. They sat in their seats and looked around in awe. The hall was truly beautiful. Since it was the Winter Concert the theme still was Christmas. On the stage stood an enormous blue and silver Christmas tree and around the hall there were garlands made of tree branches, mistletoe, holly and red ribbons. All the decorations were glistening in the light of the crystal chandeliers. The hall was full of splendour with its marbles, historic paintings and gold. On top of that, at the back of the stage was a huge, sculptured organs which towered everything. When it was 1 pm sharp a young man entered the stage.  
"Good afternoon, ladies and gentleman. My name is Son Hyunwoo and I am the conductor of the Univerity's orchestra and the teacher of today's competitors." - the man spoke and he continued to explain what the concert and the competition are all about.  
He talked for about half an hour and the two friends started to feel a bit bored. They came here to listen to music after all, and not to listen to the babbling of some stodgy conductor. Finally, the teacher introduced the first performers: two senior students, Song Gunhee who played the trombone and Lee Jooheon who played the piano. The boys entered the stage and bowed. What was strange, they both wore snapbacks what didn't really fit their formal outfits. They both seemed a little stressed but they were still smiling brightly. Hoseok was very impressed with their stage presence. They looked very professional even though they decided to wear those colourful hats. The piece that they played was Bach's Air Suite Nr. 3 arranged for piano and trombone. Hoseok was surprised that they played such a popular composer because he expected something more sophisticated but the combination of the instruments was truly unusual. When they got off the stage the audience clapped vigorously. The second duo was again two boys, one senior and one sophomore, the former called Kim Yoosu and the latter Park Minkyun. They entered the stage looking very confident and standing tall. There was something weird about them. Hoseok didn't know why but the older of those two looked a bit unpleasant. They played Mozart's Duo for Violin and Viola in G major. They gave a very good performance and the nurse already knew that he'll probably be impressed for the rest of the day. Next were two girls. They wore beautiful sparkling blue gowns and the two men couldn't help but stare. Hoseok however, suddenly flushed because he realised that one of the girls was Kihyun's ex. His flatmate's ex-girlfriend played the violin, and as he remembered she was the 1st violin in the orchestra so he really expected a lot from them. The second girl who looked a bit shy and timid played the flute. They played Telemann's Canonic Sonata and it had a completely different vibe than the previous pieces. It sounded very bright and cheerful. The audience clapped again and Hoseok gasped because the conductor announced that the next duo was Kihyun and Changkyun. Hoseok craned forward to see them more clearly. They looked really handsome in their perfectly tailored suits now that Changkyun didn't wear someone else's clothes and fortunately they didn't have any mismatched accessories. The nurse gulped when he saw his flatmate's face. He was totally blank. He didn't smile but he also didn't look nervous. He was just emotionless. The younger boy, on the other hand, was shaking so much that he could notice that even sitting so far away from the stage.  
"Oh my God, that ginger looks very terrified." - whispered Kwangji and Hoseok shushed him.  
He really wished that his friend would perform well but at the same time, he had a sinking feeling. Suddenly the conductor came back to the stage and gave Kihyun a mic. Kwangji and Hoseok exchanged a look. What was going on? It turned out that his flatmate had to explain his and his partner's idea because they used a piece of a composer who was still alive. The piece was called "Drizzle" and it was composed by Lan Chee Lam and as Kihyun said they found a sample of it on the Internet. When he finished talking they sat down and started playing. The piece was very unusual. As its name suggested it was supposed to mimic the sound of rain and what was weird they even used the insides of the piano while playing. Kwangji and Hoseok stared at each other because they had never heard anything similar. The only thing which was impossible not to notice was the ginger boy's nervousness. He was extremely pale and he was trembling all the time. Their stage presence wasn't as good as the previous performers. Even though they didn't seem to make any mistakes they also gave a strong impression of half-heartedness. People clapped again and the last duo before the break was supposed to enter the stage. As the conductor announced they were the senior year students as well. Their names were Chae Hyungwon and Lee Minhyuk and they played cello and clarinet what again seemed like a very strange combination for Hoseok. The two boys were exceptionally handsome and he heard some women who sat next to them giggle and chat enthusiastically when they saw them. He scanned the guys' silhouettes and damn, they were almost as good looking as he himself. Kwangji frowned.  
"Dude, are you just checking them out?" - he asked in an unbelieving tone.  
"Maybe..." - he whispered but they quickly fell silent because the performance had started.  
The piece they played was composed by Paul Hindemith and its name was 'Ludus minor'. As both of the instruments had a low sound the piece seemed a bit grim and gloomy but the instrumentalists were very skilled. When they were playing all the people suddenly fell completely silent and focused on the music. When the piece ended Mr Son came back on the stage and announced a special guest: an opera singer from a different Korean university who had just graduated and instantly became a new promising star. When she entered people started whispering. Hoseok heard that they were commenting on her frilly dress which looked like the one which could be worn by a ballerina. She was very pretty. She had small and a bit chubby face, big eyes and long, light brown hair. Her name was Kang Jihyun. She sang a fragment of Mozart's opera called The Magic Flute. She had a beautiful, extremely high soprano. The girl sang even the highest notes completely effortlessly. When she finished the people just couldn't stop clapping and some of the audience even stood up. Hoseok was shocked. He had no doubts that she will be a huge star. After that, there was a short break and then there were supposed to be two more parts of the concert. All the performances had finished in two hours and some of the audience left but Hoseok wanted to wait for the award ceremony and the evaluation of the competitors. They had been waiting for about 15 minutes and the jury wasn't coming to the stage and Kwangji started to be impatient. Hoseok started to beg him to stay since he didn't want to let Kihyun down and to his relief, at that moment the conductor entered the stage. Out of the blue, the competitors showed up in the recital hall and they sat in between the audience. Mr Son took the microphone and cleared his throat.  
"Ladies and gentlemen, it is my honour to introduce this year's award winners." - he said loudly and suddenly an elderly man run to him handing him a gold envelope.  
The conductor opened it and he cleared his throat nervously.  
"The the third place take... Song Gunhee and Lee Jooheon." - he said and Hoseok noticed that his hands were trembling.  
The two boys entered the stage and the elderly man congratulated them and gave them a certificate. When they left the stage Mr Son came back.  
"And the second place take.." - he said opening a different envelope - "Kim Yoosu and Park Minkyun."  
When he said that the senior and the sophomore froze on their spots staring at the place where their teacher stood. They moved only when some girls pushed them. The old man congratulated them as well but Hoseok was surprised that the two boys didn't seem to be happy at all. Especially the guy who was called Yoosu looked rather angry. He was clutching his hands and biting his lip. At one point he even glared at his partner. Hoseok exchanged looks with Kwangji. Damn, he was totally right when he thought that this senior student was unpleasant. When the conductor walked to the microphone to announce the results for the one last time Hoseok crossed his fingers and urged Kwangji to do the same. He really wished that Kihyun would win. He had seen him work very hard for all those years and he deserved it.  
"The first place take Chae Hyungwon and Lee Minhyuk! Congratulations!" - this time Mr Son didn't make any pause because he was apparently too excited to draw the ceremony out anymore.  
When the audience heard that they started to cheer loudly and the last pair entered the stage. Hoseok sighed. He couldn't hide his disappointment. He really wanted his friend to win. He needed to catch Kihyun after it all would finish. He had to check on him. When the main prize had been awarded to the winners Mr Son announced that the rest of the results will be given to the contestants after the ceremony and he told the audience to leave. Hoseok decided to stay outside the room and wait for Kihyun to come out of the recital hall.

The whole concert and the ceremony had finished at 4.30 pm. Changkyun felt terribly disappointed. Actually, he had never been so disappointed in his life. When they finally got the results it turned out that they took the twelfth place, exactly in the middle. Changkyun knew that it was his fault. He let the stage fright grip him. He knew that they were prepared well and there weren't any different problems. The piece was perfect. The arrangement was perfect. It was just that he couldn't control his emotions and they fucked up because of that. The freshman was so scared that he couldn't even look at Kihyun. After he read the paper with the result he panicked and left the hall not paying attention to the older male. The ginger knew that the senior will be furious and he wanted to avoid that. Previously, he wanted to prove Kihyun that he was worth attending the school but now his worst scenario came true. He rushed through the hallway wanting to leave as quickly as he could. All that he wanted was to disappear. He almost felt as if he was going to cry and his eyes already prickled. He couldn't cry. He wasn't a crybaby. He was a nineteen-year-old guy after all. Grown men don't cry. He almost reached the dressing room when he suddenly felt someone grab his arm. He turned around and when he saw who it was he felt as if he was going to faint.  
"K-K-Kihyun, I-I..." - he stammered out his voice hoarse.  
He started to tremble again. He was really scared of the brunette's reaction. Kihyun compressed his lips. He was pale as well but he didn't look angry at all. He only seemed to be very tired and he just stood silently still gripping Changkyun's arm.  
"I'm sorry..." - whispered the ginger - "I know that it's my fault. C-can you let me go?" - he stuttered feeling the urge to cry again, however, Kihyun still didn't lose his hold.  
"Look at me." - he demanded in low voice and the ginger shook his head.  
Why did he enjoy torturing him?  
"Changkyun, please, look at me." - he repeated and the younger boy finally forced himself to do so.  
Now he was so nervous that he was shaking. However, he froze when he saw Kihyun's face.  
"I don't think that it was your fault. I know that you wanted to give your best." - he said calmly and came closer to pat him on the back - "It's ok. I know that you think that I wanted to win but the rest was just better than us. And you'll have another chance next year."  
Changkyun gulped.  
"But... You won't have any more chances. It's your last year." - he said disappointedly.  
Kihyun bit his lip.  
"Don't worry, I'll manage somehow. I'm the best pianist to ever grace this school after all." - he replied trying to joke but he only smiled wryly.  
The ginger laughed half-heartedly what made Kihyun laugh sincerely.  
"See?" - asked the brunette and he stroked the younger boy's back lightly when suddenly the latter froze.  
"Hi." - they heard a male voice so they turned around.  
It was Kihyun's flatmate, Hoseok, who came with some other brown-haired man.  
"H-hello." - replied Changkyun stuttering because his voice wasn't working properly.  
"It's my co-worker, Kwangji and we came to see your performance as I promised." - said Hoseok, trying to smile but it was hard when the two instrumentalists were in such a bad mood - "I just wanted to tell you that I loved it regardless which place you took. I have learnt a lot about classical music today and I don't regret coming here. All the musicians were awesome, and wow, you're all very talented." - when he spoke Kwangji nodded to everything that he said.  
Kihyun smiled shyly but Changkyun still looked extremely nervous. Suddenly Hoseok hugged Kihyun and Changkyun and Kwangji exchanged looks. It was all getting very awkward so the four men decided to close that case and they just took their coats from the dressing room and they walked out of the building together. However, after no more than 5 minutes Hoseok opened his mouth again and tried to convince the musicians that their performance was a good one again with an almost equally miserable result. They talked outside for a while but when it all became too much they just decided to part their ways and go home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N:] I had a huge problem with the award ceremony and I just literally translated how it would be said in my language so it's probably wrong but I couldn't even found a video of a similar ceremony so I just left it as it is.


	8. Not a date

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [A/N]: I just wanted to let you know that I didn't have time to check that chapter fully because don't even know what am I doing anymore so I don't know if everything makes sense. I'm too impatient so I'll just post it now and I'm going to correct that later.

The next Monday Kihyun was waiting outside a classroom with his friends and Gunhee. The short brunette felt a bit weird to spend time with the 2/3 of the award winners when he himself got such a low position in the competition. The boys, however, were very nice and didn't make fun of him, unlike some other classmates. But Kihyun knew that he deserved that. Previously, he was the one who looked down on people who had poor results, so now they believed that he was a hypocrite. At that particular moment, they were waiting for their first class that day to start. Kihyun tried not to think about the concert but it wasn't easy when people were passing by them all the time and congratulating the 4 boys.  
"How did you do that?" - he asked Hyungwon out of the blue.  
The taller brunette frowned.  
"Do what?" - he asked looking totally confused - "What are you talking about?"  
"How did you manage to take the first place when you started practising so late?" - it was really bothering him.  
He still remembered that October day when they were sitting in the cafeteria with Yoosu and he asked Hyungwon and Minhuk about their concert practice and the two of them replied that they didn't even start. Kihyun couldn't help to feel envy. At that time he and Changkyun had already everything planned.  
Hyungwon just stared, so Minhyuk cut in.  
"I don't know... I think that we were just lucky. We knew that we couldn't prepare perfectly because we started late so we just took it easy." - said the blonde glancing at Kihyun seemingly concerned - "Don't worry, I still think you did well."  
"Yeah, the piece you chose was awesome! I never heard something like that" - exclaimed Jooheon joining the conversation.  
Gunhee rolled his eyes.  
"Oh my God, stop buttering him up. Can't you see that he just wants to start an argument?" - he asked raising his eyebrow.  
Kihyun glared at him.  
"Shut up." - he ground out - "I don't get why you're always suspecting me of plotting something evil. I really just wanted to know."  
"Gunhee, stop it, I think he's telling the truth." - said the blonde percussionist nudging his friend's side - "Just let him live."  
"By the way, I think that you didn't do well only because you were too nervous. You tried too hard." - Hyungwon turned his head to talk to Kihyun.  
The short brunette lowered his eyes but he nodded. He knew well that it was the reason and he didn't need anyone to remind him about that.  
"Yeah, poor Changkyun looked so terribly stressed out." - said Jooheon dully.  
Kihyun pouted.  
"You probably hate him even more now, am I right?!" - exclaimed Gunhee in an accusatory tone.  
He wanted to ignore him, but at the same time, he knew that if he will do so Gunhee will think that he was an asshole for the rest of his life.  
"No." - he said sternly - "I know that he tried hard. He wanted to win as much as I did but he just couldn't control his emotions."  
His friends stared at him in shock. They probably really thought that he still hated that ginger kid. Kihyun had enough of the conversation. He didn't want to listen to false accusations so he just wanted to leave but he knew that he couldn't so he sighed with relief when the teacher came.  
~*~  
The weeks were passing and before they even had a chance to think about it, it was already February. After they were finished with the rehearsals for the concert Changkyun suddenly started to have more free time. Previously, they had been so busy with practising that he even forgot how it was. He was spending the majority of his free time with Yoonho and Seokwon and at that time he could finally call them his friends. He also started to think again about his dream career as a rapper. When he wasn't busy with school, he was writing his own lyrics and composing beats which then he posted on YouTube for people to use. He sometimes showed his works to his two classmates but Yoonho and Seokwon showed little interest in that. They praised him, of course, but at the same time, he could feel that they were looking down on this kind of music. However, even though he tried to be busy with something the whole time, he still felt some sort of emptiness. Sometimes he passed by Jooheon or Gunhee on a corridor but every time he tried to speak with them they were rushing somewhere. As Jooheon had told him they supposedly were busy with writing their bachelor theses and when he asked them about Kihyun they always told him that he was either studying or practising. He understood that perfectly since it was their last year and they had a lot of work. Nevertheless, he still wondered what Kihyun was doing. The only time when he could see him was their orchestra rehearsals but they usually only greeted each other and didn't even have time to have a brief word. At that point, he started regretting that he had told Miss Yoon that he didn't want the older boy to tutor him anymore the day after they argued because of the kiss. Changkyun couldn't shake the feeling that something was lacking. And he was surprised that he didn't need to think much to realise what it was. He missed Kihyun. Yes, he could admit that. Since that Winter Concert, he just couldn't get him out of his head. Changkyun thought that after the brunette had told him that he didn't hate him anymore they would get closer. That maybe they will even become friends. He truly believed that especially after Kihyun wasn't angry at him after he ruined the concert. But that never happened. They just grew apart. Sometimes he even thought that Kihyun probably just didn't care about him at all so he just carried on with his life after they had finished everything that they had to do together. He couldn't help his worries and they were overwhelming him. Actually, he knew that he didn't want to be just friends with Kihyun. He knew that feeling. He used to have crushes and he also had a boyfriend before. And more than likely Kihyun just didn't like him back. The older boy had told him that he was straight and it couldn't be more clear. He just had false hope but it was also partially Kihyun's fault. Who told him to caress Changkyun's hair? After the older boy did that the younger male knew that it was too late already. He couldn't stop liking him. Suddenly he was brought back to reality when someone sat at his table in the cafeteria. It was Yoonho and Seokwon. They greeted him and started eating the food they had brought with themselves. It was their lunch break. After a few minutes, Yoonho offered him one of his cookies but he shook his head. He had left his lunch in the middle of eating because he didn't feel like eating anymore. And he definitely didn't feel like eating sweets at that moment. When he refused Yoonho stared at him narrowly.  
"Are you ok?" - he asked in surprised tone - "Why did you stop eating?" - he continued pointing to Changkyun's plate.  
"Yeah, you look as if something is bothering you." - Seokwon joined the conversation - "And don't tell me that you're fine because you definitely don't seem so." - he added when Changkyun opened his mouth to say exactly that.  
The ginger boy sighed.  
"I'm not hungry anymore." - he whined but the two other boys threw him a dubious look - "You'll laugh at me if I told you the truth" - he protested but his classmates already pricked up their ears.  
"Tell us." - said Seokwon daringly and wiggled his eyebrow.  
"Promise you will not laugh." - he demanded, glaring at them.  
He wasn't sure if they had been friends long enough to trust them. The two boys eagerly nodded their heads.  
"Ok." - he said flatly but he felt that his hands started to tremble slightly so he hid them under the table - "So... I have a crush on someone I shouldn't and I don't know what to do." - he confessed feeling totally stupid after he had put that into words.  
He probably sounded like some emo teenager. Yoonho and Seokwon stared at him blankly.  
"Oh, I thought that it was something like that after I saw your expression. Sorry, but you couldn't be more obvious." - spoke Seokwon after a long moment of silence.  
Yoonho, however, squirmed on his spot.  
"OMG who is that?" - he squealed loudly - "Is it Mrs MacDougall?"  
Changkyun facepalmed himself. Yoonho always acted like a kid.  
"No." - he said sternly - "You're so dumb. Do you still think that she really gave me a love letter?"  
When his classmate nodded he sighed loudly.  
"Oh, speaking of love letters..." - started Seokwon, suddenly brought back to reality by Changkyun's words - "It's Valentine's Day next week so why won't you send a card to her?" - he suggested.  
The ginger frowned.  
"Why would I send a Valentine Day's card to Mrs MacDougall?" - he asked in an unbelieving tone.  
Seokwon laughed so loudly that it caused some people who sat at the table next to them turn around.  
"I'm not speaking about Mrs MacDougall. I'm talking about your crush." - he said after he managed to calm down - "Assuming that we believe that she isn't your crush." - he added rising his eyebrow - "She has a husband though so I wouldn't recommend that."  
Changkyun groaned. Who did he have to deal with?  
"Hmm, it sounds quite tempting, but don't you think that we're too old for that already? We're at university, not in primary school!" - he exclaimed.  
He really thought that it was a bit embarrassing.  
"If they thought that we were too old for Valentine Day's cards then they wouldn't create Valentine's Day mail, here at the university." - said Seokwon, and Changkyun was surprised because he had never heard about it.  
He stared at the table contemplating the suggestion.  
"Ok..." - he said slowly - "Maybe I'll do that because I have no better idea."  
"Wait!" - Yoonho suddenly jumped on his spot - "You said that you have a crush on someone you shouldn't and if Mrs MacDougall has a husband then it has to be her!" - he exclaimed looking like a madman.  
Changkyun and Seokwon exchanged looks.  
"Yoonho!" - they yelled at the same time.  
"Changkyun is right. You're seriously dumb." - added the latter.  
After that, there was a long pause so they just decided to continue with the lunch and the ginger was glad that his friends didn't come back to that topic again.  
~*~  
It was the Friday before the Valentine's Day, which was on Sunday, and Changkyun actually did as his classmates suggested. He had written the letter and sent it through the special university mail, however, he felt embarrassed because of that. He still thought that it was something that a primary school student would do but he just had to do something and had no better ideas. He hoped that he wouldn't make a fool of himself when the older boy will read it. It was so corny. He tried to convince himself that he didn't care since there was little chance for it to work but he still felt impatient waiting for some sort of reaction, even if it would be negative. But still, he couldn't keep his emotions forever, because otherwise, he would go crazy. He was on pins and needles for the whole day and he couldn't focus on his classes. However, nothing happened, and as usual, he didn't even see Kihyun at the campus. It seemed as if last month the older boy had disappeared off the face of the earth. He felt disappointed but at the same, time he knew that he shouldn't expect anything. He didn't even know how the mail actually worked. He had no idea when the card was supposed to be delivered but logically it should be on the Valentine's Day. At 5 pm, in this absent-minded state, he started to walk out of the university's building when suddenly someone appeared out of nowhere before him. He almost had a heart attack when he recognised Kihyun.  
"H-hi." - he stuttered.  
It was weird to speak with him for the first time after such a long time. It was also the first time they met after Changkyun realised that he felt something for him.  
"Hi." - replied the short brunette smiling wryly.  
After they greeted each other they had a short and awkward small talk. It seemed that after they were finished with those rehearsals everything came back to as it was before, and there was only one difference. Now they didn't hate each other. The brunette looked a bit uncomfortable and he was kicking his heels nervously.  
"I wonder if you maybe wanted to meet this weekend?" - blurted out Kihyun out of the blue.  
Changkyun stared at him blankly. He wanted to scream. Did he just mishear? Was it a dream? He must have had a very weird expression because Kihyun suddenly looked very confused.  
"What? Did I say something wrong?" - he asked in a surprised tone - "I-I just thought that you maybe wanted to meet. Jooheon had told me that you were asking for me all the time recently." - he stuttered and gulped - "Oh my God, I totally forgot that it's Valentine's Day this week." - he suddenly added and it really seemed that he really realised it just then - "I'm so sorry. That was embarrassing." - he quickly looked away and blushed what made Changkyun's heart race - "You probably want to meet with your date or something."  
Changkyun frowned. Did he really forget that it was Valentine's Day or was he playing dumb?  
"I-I'm s-single though." - he stammered out.  
Kihyun stared at him and it was obvious that he didn't know how to respond to that.  
"Er... That's probably a wild idea but do you maybe still want to meet this weekend then?" - he asked and Changkyun suddenly felt dizzy.  
Was it for real?  
"I totally hate that holiday. I'm sick of all the couples. You just can't run away from them. And it just so happens that you're single and I'm single so maybe it would be a good idea." - explained the brunette - "And don't think that it's a date. It's not a date." - he added quickly shaking his head - "Oh God, I completely forgot that he's gay." - he whispered to himself - "You don't have to agree to that if you don't want to." - he added.  
He suddenly looked as if he had a mental battle with himself and Changkyun couldn't help to chuckle.  
"What?" - snarled Kihyun - "Why are you laughing at me?" - he asked seemingly offended.  
"Nothing." - he replied quickly shaking his head - "I'm not laughing at you."  
Oh, God. He almost ruined everything. He forgot that the brunette was easily offended.  
"And sure, we can meet." - he added trying to sound as casual as he could but it was hard when his heart was beating frantically in his chest.  
"Ok, so let's meet here tomorrow. Is 1 pm o'clock ok?" - asked the older boy.  
The ginger nodded and tried to calm his heart rate. He knew that he shouldn't expect too much, especially after Kihyun stressed that it wasn't a date. When the older boy walked away he started wondering if he had made a good decision. He wasn't sure if he will be able to treat him just like a friend mainly because he wanted something more than that. Changkyun already felt excited and it could only get worse the next day.  
~*~  
On Saturday Changkyun woke up at 5 am and he couldn't sleep anymore. He didn't know what to do because he was too nervous and he couldn't think of anything else than Kihyun. Finally, he decided to study to distract himself. At 9 am he had already finished his homework for the whole week and he found himself daydreaming again. He knew that he should stop so he turned his computer on and started to work on a new song. At first, he wanted to practice playing the piano but when he glanced at it, it reminded him about the dark-haired senior, so it probably wasn't a good idea. He worked for about two hours when he decided that he finally has to get dressed and go because it always took him quite long to get to the university building and that was where they were supposed to meet. When he got on the bus he realised again how nervous he was. He knew that it wasn't a date but he still couldn't shake this weird feeling off. His hands were trembling slightly and he couldn't help it. He couldn't wait when he will finally see him. He waited three weeks to talk with him one-to-one. It took him over an hour to get there and when he arrived, he noticed that Kihyun was already there. It shouldn't even surprise him considering that the older boy was always early. He walked up to him and said hi. The brunette replied smiling but after that, he stared at the younger boy narrowly. It seemed that he had noticed Changkyun's nervousness. The ginger felt embarrassed with his own reactions so he folded his arms to stop his hands from trembling. They were supposed to be here as friends, for fuck's sake. Changkyun scolded himself mentally but it was very hard for him to control his behaviour.  
"Do you want to go to a coffee shop?" - asked the older one - "I know a good one not far away from there." - he suggested.  
Changkyun nodded and he let the older one guide him to the place because he had never heard about it. For the first five minutes, they walked in silence since they both felt extremely awkward. There had been only this one time before that they had spent time together not studying and it was when Changkyun slept over at his house and it was very embarrassing already. Finally, they overcame the awkward feeling and they started to talk. The younger boy asked him about his school work, and God, they brunette truly was extremely busy. The things that he had told him made him wonder whether he would survive the third year in the future. Finally, after about 15 minutes they saw the coffee shop. They entered and as soon as they did that, they realised that the café was totally packed. And on top of that, at the table just by the entrance, there was a couple making out. Changkyun tried to muffle his giggle when he saw Kihyun cringe.  
"Do they really have to do that here?" - whined the brunette and the younger boy smiled wryly.  
"I don't get why you're so offended by all those couples..." - he muttered - "You had a girlfriend before so I really don't understand why are all those people bothering you."  
Kihyun compressed his lips and it seemed that he didn't want to talk about it but eventually, he decided to speak.  
"It's not that I hate when other people are happy or something, or that I'm grossed out by that, it's just it used to remind me of her. The breakup was really hard for me at first. But now I'm a bit better after she had recently told me that she has a new boyfriend already. And I'm just not very into PDA." - he said in low voice not to be heard by the people around them.  
Not that they would because it was already quite noisy at the coffee shop. Changkyun just nodded because he didn't know how to reply to that. He felt a bit sorry for him. He never even thought that it might have been hard for him. But his own relationships never were so serious so he couldn't relate.  
"Ok, let's just order something." - he offered because the topic started to get dangerous and he wanted to avoid any more awkwardness.  
Kihyun nodded and they waited in the queue. When they finally ordered everything that they wanted they decided to go back to the university building because the place was completely packed.  
"Sorry, I never thought that there would be so many people." - said the older one in sad tone when they started to walk again - "We can't even drink a coffee in peace."  
"Don't worry. At least we can talk. And you don't have to suffer alone, looking at all those overly touchy couples." - joked the ginger, winking at him what made the brunette laugh.  
"Thank you. What would I do without you?" - he asked ironically and rolled his eyes and Changkyun laughed as well.  
When they almost reached the building Kihyun spoke again.  
"Maybe we should finish drinking that coffee in my car?" - he offered - "It's quite cold outside."  
Changkyun nodded. It was a good idea. He was right. It was so cold that he could see his own breath and his hands were already red because he was so stupid that he forgot to take his gloves. There was a bit of snow on the ground but it hadn't been snowing recently so it already morphed into a thick layer of solid ice. The air was so freezing cold and dry that it almost hurt their lungs. They got in Kihyun's car and Changkyun blushed at the memory of the brunette driving him home. Fortunately, the older boy didn't notice that. They drunk the coffee and the ginger suddenly got an idea. He chewed on his lower lip because he had no idea how would Kihyun react to that. The younger boy called his name to make him pay attention to him.  
"Now that we are in your car it reminded me that you were supposed to drive me to my house that day." - he said slowly after the brunette turned his head to him and something fluttered in Changkyun's stomach when he noticed that the older boy's eyes widened - "Maybe this time you'll fulfil your promise?" - he asked with a sly smile.  
He noticed that Kihyun gulped nervously. The ginger-haired boy wasn't sure if what he was doing was right but it was now or never. The brunette was quiet for a few seconds and Changkyun almost thought that he had said too much.  
"Er... Yeah, I can do it. You're right, I should keep my promise." - the brunette spoke finally but he also was a bit paler than before.  
The ginger stared at him in shock. He was surprised that it actually worked. Now his heart was beating so fast that it almost felt as if it could escape his chest any second.  
"G-great, I-I'll guide you." - he stammered out.  
For the next half an hour the younger one was telling him the directions. It was way quicker to get there by car than by a bus. At one point, Kihyun suddenly laughed loudly.  
"Omg, it seems as if you were my GPS. - he said after that - "Even your voice matches!"  
He laughed so hard that he had tears in his eyes. Changkyun pouted because he was just compared to an electronic device but after he got what was Kihyun talking about he laughed as well. There was some truth in what he had just said because his deep, clear voice was indeed very similar.  
"Oh, wait, we're almost there!" - he exclaimed suddenly when he noticed that Kihyun turned into a wrong street.  
After five more minutes, they finally managed to get to the destination. Kihyun stopped just before the block of apartments and looked at Changkyun expectantly.  
"You're not getting out?" - he asked in a surprised tone.  
Changkyun stared at him.  
"Y-you're not going with me?" - he stuttered.  
Oh, no. It wasn't supposed to be like that. They stared at each other in silence for a while and everything was getting awkward for the nth time that day.  
"You can go with me if you want. I'd like to return the favour. I've seen your house so I want to show you mine." - he said lowering his eyes because he was too scared to look at his face - "To encourage you I can say that I have no nosy flatmates." - this time he glanced at him and smirked.  
The look on the brunette's face was priceless. It was a mixture of shock and confusion. After a few seconds, the older boy laughed nervously.  
"Er... I'm not sure... I don't want to wear out your welcome." - he replied and his voice was trembling.  
Changkyun pouted. He couldn't help it. When the older boy noticed his expression, he made a weird sound. The ginger knew that his sad face always worked to get him what he wanted. He didn't use it too much because it was quite childish but this time he really wished to get it his way.  
"Please." - he whined and deepened his pout.  
Internally he was extremely embarrassed by his own behaviour.  
"I don't have anything to do anyway." - he added.  
Kihyun's ears were red and he was chewing on his lip. Changkyun knew well how his words sounded. He was aware that it was going in a completely different direction than the older boy wanted.  
"F-fine." - said the brunette hesitantly - "But I won't stay here long... I have to, er, study."  
The ginger-haired boy felt victorious. He tried very hard not to smile like an idiot. After that, they entered the building and went upstairs. Changkyun lived in a tiny studio flat on the fourth floor. When they entered the flat the older boy took off his coat and shoes and looked around, clearly amazed. It was just one small room but it was very bright and it was arranged in a minimalistic way. Besides the essential pieces of furniture, he only had a computer, laptop, a guitar and an electric piano which were all cramped in one corner.  
"How did you, a student, find a flat like that?" - asked Kihyun with his mouth gaped.  
Changkyun scratched the back of his neck uncomfortably.  
"Oh, my parents inherited it from one of my elderly aunts after her death and they gave it to me after they found out that I will be studying in the city." - he explained.  
"Wow, you're so lucky." - whispered the brunette - "It's not that I dislike my flatmate but you know him already." - he added and Changkyun laughed because he understood what he meant.  
"Would you like some tea?" - he asked out of the blue.  
Kihyun's red nose reminded him of how cold it was outside. And he also didn't want him to go so he tried to prevent that before the older male had even time to think about it.  
"And we can also watch something if you want." - he added after the brunette nodded and he went to put the kettle on.  
After the water boiled he made the tea and came back to Kihyun. He was surprised to find him standing in the middle of the room.  
"Why didn't you sit down?" - he asked glancing at the sofa - "You can sit down, it's ok. - he encouraged him and he finally did so.  
They started to talk about some things that they would like to watch but they couldn't reach any compromise. They actually didn't talk much about things which weren't connected with music before so he never realised that it would be so hard. When it came to the series and movies which they wanted to watch they didn't have much in common. If there was anything that Changkyun wanted to see Kihyun had either already seen it or had no interest in that. The ginger decided that he had to quickly change the subject before they will start to argue. If they did it would definitely ruin everything.  
"Have you seen the card?" - he asked not thinking much about what he was saying.  
He didn't realise that it probably wasn't the best topic since it could make everything awkward and embarrassing pretty quickly. But Kihyun didn't mention it at all before and Changkyun was dying to know.  
"What card?" - asked the brunette with a completely shocked expression - "What are you talking about?"  
"A c-card, you know... The university mail... That sort of things" - he suddenly started to stutter because he didn't want to make a fool of himself.  
Kihyun frowned.  
"What do you mean by the university mail? I've never heard of something like that." - muttered the brunette and Changkyun's heartbeat started to accelerate.  
He started to wonder whether Kihyun really had no idea or he just pretended.  
"By the way, are you still thinking about the rapper career sometimes?" - apparently, the older male decided to change the topic before Changkyun even had time to handle the whole situation.  
Even though he really wanted to know what Kihyun thought about the letter he sighed with relief. Maybe it wasn't the best moment for the conversation.  
"Yes, I'm actually making my own music right now in my free time." - he replied when he was finally able to gather his thoughts - "I can show you a few of the beats that I have composed." - he suggested.  
He was always very eager to talk about rap and not many people at his school shared his interests so that's why he got quite excited when the older boy asked about that.  
"I don't know about my lyrics though. I don't really want to show you them because they're, well, embarrassing." - he added when he came back with his laptop.  
He turned it on and Kihyun moved a bit closer to see what was on the screen. They were listening to those pieces for some time and the brunette seemed to be quite pleased with what the younger one had created and it made Changkyun feel ecstatic. Sometimes he was pointing out some mistakes but it only proved that he was truly listening to the music and not just doing that to please the younger boy. After they finished listening to Changkyun's compositions Kihyun continued to ask him about rap and those things he liked. The younger boy showed him a few artists which had inspired him to become a rapper but after he stopped talking they had suddenly exhausted the topic and they both fell silent. The silence made him realise that it was already dark. He could see the light of the street lamps outside the huge window of his flat. Why did they always have to become awkward everytime he tried to be closer to him? There were both quiet for long minutes and Changkyun was afraid that they will get overwhelmed by awkwardness once again. And it all happened just minutes after everything was going so well. When he wasn't distracted by the conversation anymore his emotions came back twice as strong as they were that morning. He suddenly felt very aware of how close they were sitting. It worried him whether Kihyun really didn't know about the love letter or not. He really wanted to make his feelings known to him. He knew that he wouldn't be able to pretend that he saw the older boy just as his friend in the long run. And he still had the feeling that they weren't close enough. Every time after they had talked decently the older one was crawling into his shell again and it seemed as if he desperately tried to keep distance. And that wasn't what Changkyun wanted. He was trying to make Kihyun open to him but the more they talked the more they grew apart later and it worried him. He couldn't take it anymore. He missed him and those three weeks felt like an eternity. When they were sitting together on the couch so closely it made him realise that he wanted to touch the brunette so badly. He really wished that it was a date. He should be glad that they could spend some time together but he was too greedy. He wanted something more than that. The freshman knew that he could go crazy any moment so he decided to do something about it. At least, he will make his intentions clear to the other male. Kihyun, on the other hand, obviously didn't know what to do with himself anymore. At that particular moment, he was pretending that the flowers on Changkyun's window sill were very fascinating. He knew that the brunette was trying to do everything to avoid looking at him. So he decided to pretend that he was trying to take the remote control that was lying next to Kihyun's hand and their hands brushed. The older boy turned around and quickly glanced at him. The brunette seemed very timid. His legs were trembling slightly and he was avoiding all eye contact. Changkyun didn't want it to end this way. This time, he purposefully moved closer to him so that they were sitting side by side. The ginger noticed that the older male's chest was moving quickly and he almost felt bad for making him so nervous. He glanced at Kihyun's face. He found him extremely handsome. He liked his sharp chin, straight nose and dark, sparkling eyes. And the way his thin lips curled when he smiled made him feel all sorts of things. Something fluttered weirdly in his stomach as he studied his features and he couldn't help that. Was it really that wrong that he wanted to be close to him? At that moment he finally decided. He moved even closer and left a soft peck on his lips. He quickly pulled back to check the older boy's reaction. When he glanced at him he felt almost as if his heart stopped. The brunette just sat there, petrified. Oh, no.  
"K-Kihyun, I'm sorry... I couldn't help it." - he stammered out in a low voice.  
He looked at him worriedly. He expected the older male to run away any second but it didn't happen. The brunette was apparently in a complete shock but their hands were still almost touching and he didn't even budge. Changkyun knew that it was probably a bad idea but he just had to try it once again. Fuck it, he had to be sure. They were still inches apart so he just closed his eyes and shortened the distance between their faces. Their lips slowly brushed and the ginger suddenly gasped when he felt that Kihyun put his hands on his neck. It was something that he apparently liked to do because it was what he did when he kissed Changkyun during the Christmas party. He was surprised when he felt that Kihyun was kissing him back. He didn't understand him at all since he seemed to avoid any closeness the whole day but he couldn't care less when he felt their lips move together. Suddenly Kihyun pulled away breaking the kiss. Changkyun didn't open his eyes and bit his lip. He was probably too greedy but he wished the kiss lasted a bit longer. He really felt that he needed him or else his heart would break. Suddenly he felt arms circle his waist. He gasped shocked by the sudden action. The arms pulled him closer and he rested his head on Kihyun's shoulder. They were so close that he could feel the brunette's heartbeat go crazy and he knew that the older boy was terribly nervous. He laughed inaudibly. He found it cute that the older male was always so shy whatever they did and even if he was the one who initiated it. He breathed in slowly. Unlike Kihyun, he suddenly felt very calm and safe when they were so close. The smell of the brunette's cologne and fabric softener filled his lungs. He wanted the moment to last forever but the thought that Kihyun may panic and back away any second niggled him. He also circled Kihyun's waist with his arms and stroked his back gently. The boy shivered and Changkyun's heart sunk. He already knew that he had crossed the line. The brunette let go of him and moved away on the sofa. The ginger pouted and lowered his eyes too scared to check Kihyun's reaction.  
"It's late." - he suddenly heard the older boy whispered.  
When he opened his eyes he found the older boy looking through the window.  
"What time is it?" - asked the brunette but he checked it on his own watch and his eyes widened - "Oh, my God, I didn't even know that it was 8 pm already." - he said in shocked voice - "I really have to go. I was supposed to finish a project for Monday." - he added and clenched his teeth.  
Changkyun nodded nibbling his lower lip. He knew that he should let him go even though it was very hard because he wanted to be with him as long as he could but on the other hand, Kihyun wasn't even supposed to come here so he couldn't keep him here forever.  
"I'm sorry..." - he whispered.  
He wasn't sure if anything that he done just moments ago was ok. He also felt sorry for constantly dragging out his meeting with Kihyun. He didn't even consider the fact that the older boy more than likely had a ton of other things to do.  
"I'll see you to the door." - he suggested after a few seconds and Kihyun nodded.  
They got up and walked together to the door where Changkyun waited for him to get dressed. When the older male was ready to go out the ginger suddenly put his hand on his arm.  
"Kihyun..." - he started not knowing how to put that in words - "I-I actually think that it was a date." - he admitted and he felt that he was trembling.  
The brunette was trembling even more than him.  
"Er..." - he blurted out and gulped nervously - "P-please, d-don't tell anyone what had happened here, ok?" - he stuttered out - "I..." - he wanted to say something more but apparently, he couldn't.  
Changkyun nodded.  
"Ok. Thank you that you came here. You can't even imagine how happy I am." - he said and before Kihyun even had time to reply he quickly kissed him on the cheek - "Bye." - he added.  
When he glanced at him his whole face was flushed and he just chuckled at that sight.  
"Hey, I'm not trying to get rid of you or something but you have just told me that you had to go." - he reminded him and the older male nodded frantically.  
He also said 'bye' to Changkyun and finally went out of the flat. When the door closed the ginger pinched his arm to check whether it all was real and it hurt. He couldn't believe that he managed to steal three kisses from him that day.


	9. The Red Card

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Merry Christmas for you all <3

On Monday Kihyun entered the university's building in a half-asleep state. He had been finishing his end of semester project the whole night. It was partially his own fault that he didn't start it earlier but the brunette also knew that he shouldn't have spent the whole Saturday doing what he eventually had done. The senior had no idea how it could end up like this. He wasn't in a very good mood but he knew that he had to move on. Even though he didn't really want to be at school at that moment, he fought the feeling and he reluctantly entered the locker room. He took his coat off, folded it and rifled through his bag to find the key to his locker. When he finally found it, he glanced at the metal door and froze. There was something red pushed into the crack on the left side and it blocked the lock. Kihyun groaned. What the hell was that supposed to mean? Was someone trying to prank him? That wouldn't be very implausible considering how many people disliked him. He threw his coat on the bench and studied the locker more closely. To his surprise, the red thing looked like some kind of paper or cardboard. He sighed and tried to pull it out of the crack. It turned out to be a way harder than it previously seemed to be. He fought with the damn piece of paper for good five minutes until he eventually got so angry that he just sat on the bench and hid his face in his hands. He breathed in and out trying to calm himself down. At that point, he started considering whether he should ask one of his friends to keep his belongings for him. He was sure that he could count on them but he eventually decided to try for the one last time. His nails grew quite long so he managed to grip the red paper with his two fingers and after a few seconds of tugging it, he managed to tear a fragment of it out.  
"Fucking hell." - he swore under his breath - "What a damn asshole would do something like that? Who the fuck thought that it was a good idea?"  
Just at the moment when he was still muttering swears under his nose Jooheon entered the room and looked at him as if he just saw an alien. The blonde judged him for a few seconds in silence and he narrowed his eyes so much that one couldn't even tell if they were still opened or not.  
"Are you ok?" - asked the percussionist after a while when Kihyun finally shut up.  
The brunette threw him a dubious look.  
"Oh, dude, please, can't you see that I'm fucking pissed off?" - he ground out and he sat on the bench again after he took his books out of the locker.  
It turned out that the second part of the red sheet of paper stayed inside and it fell out as he opened the locker. He quickly picked it up and hid it in one of his books. Jooheon watched the piece of paper fall down to the floor like in slow motion and he sent the brunette a questioning look but after that, he turned around to put his jacket into his own locker which was exactly on the opposite side of Kihyun's own one. But as he took all of his things out of his locker he turned around to the brunette again and started to stare at him. It seemed that at that moment he didn't want to give up on finding out why his friend was angry. Kihyun should have known that Jooheon and the rest of his friends were always overly curious and he never managed to hide the truth from them. The pianist gulped loudly as the blonde's blue eyes were nailed on him. His gaze was very intimidating and Kihyun wished that the day his friend started to wear those contact lenses instead of glasses never happened. They made his stare ten times more striking.  
"Ok, ok. I get it." - he blurted out quickly because he had a feeling that Jooheon wanted to kill him with his stare - "You want to know why I'm so angry, am I right?" - he asked trying very hard to avoid looking at him any longer.  
"Only if you want to tell me." - replied the blonde in a casual tone and Kihyun rolled his eyes.  
Who Jooheon tried to fool? He just couldn't be more obvious that he was trying to find it out.  
"Ok, I'll tell you. Some dumb fucker almost broke my locker because they tried to push some damn red piece of paper into it." - he tried to explain that calmly but even thinking about it gave him a headache.  
Jooheon stared at him blankly.  
"Why would someone do something like that?" - he asked in a low voice clearly surprised - "By the way, was there anything written on the piece of paper? Did you even check?"  
As the blonde asked the question Kihyun realised that it should be the first thing to do, so he just palmed his face and quickly took the red, torn paper out of his book.  
"What if it is an anonymous threat or something?" - asked Jooheon in panicky voice and the brunette sighed - "That would make sense. You should watch your back!" - he added in a conspirational tone.  
Lee Jooheon, the scaremonger #1 at the whole university. How could Kihyun forget about that?  
"Calm the fuck down." - he muttered and started to read.  
As soon as he read the first word he felt that his cheeks started to burn. Uh-oh. Now he knew what Changkyun had meant when he talked about some cards and the university mail or whatever it was called. It was a love letter. He could tell that it was written by Changkyun even though the second part of it was still safe in his book. It just had to be it.  
"What is it?" - asked the blonde in an excited tone as he saw Kihyun's flushed face.  
"H-holy cow." - he stuttered out - "That's a damn love letter."  
Jooheon gaped his mouth but after he processed the information he started to jump up and down like a little kid.  
"Oh my God, someone likes you!" - he squealed and Kihyun suddenly recalled why he sometimes hated the blonde and his so-called "twin", Minhyuk.  
It was because the two blondes were capable of making the most inhuman noises he had ever heard.  
"Is it signed?" - asked Jooheon after he calmed down a bit.  
Kihyun gulped. He didn't want to show that he knew who wrote it.  
"Er, no. I pulled too hard and the card split into two parts. And the second one is so crumpled that it's illegible. - he lied feeling small drops of perspiration show on his back.  
The brunette still hasn't read what was written in the second part of it so it was better to play dumb. He was sure that there just had to written be something very personal. Jooheon pouted.  
"Oh, what a pity. I hope that you'll find out one day who wrote it. It's very cute that someone put so much effort to do something like that for you." - he said dreamingly.  
Kihyun rolled his eyes for the nth time that day. It seemed that his friend was more excited about the letter than he himself.  
"I don't get why they tried to break your locker, though." - added the blonde after a few seconds rising his eyebrow.  
"That's the point." - said the pianist blankly - "Oh, wait. I've heard that there was some kind of a university mail and they were supposed to deliver the Valentine cards to everyone." - he added after he suddenly recalled what Changkyun had told him the other day.  
"Really?" - asked Jooheon in surprised tone - "They have weird methods then."  
Kihyun laughed half-heartedly.  
"They're shit, I guess." - he stated.  
After that, he glanced at his watch and realised that they had only 5 minutes before the first class would start. He totally forgot that they came there to study. He urged his friend and they both rushed out of the locker room.  
~*~  
Kihyun couldn't focus much during his classes that day. He felt weird after it turned out that Changkyun really did feel something for him. Previously, he didn't even understand what the younger boy meant by 'the card'. And also he was too busy on Sunday to even think what had actually had happened that Saturday afternoon so when he wasn't stressed out about meeting the deadlines anymore the reality hit him like a truck. He wasn't drunk this time so he had no excuse for what they had done. Kihyun couldn't understand his own reactions. He should've told him to stop after the first time their lips touched. He had felt extremely embarrassed by the peck but then when Changkyun got closer to him for the second time something went terribly wrong. Kihyun definitely needed a new brain because this one clearly didn't work properly. Why on earth did he kiss him back? It made no sense. Maybe he just missed this kind of contact after such a long time when he couldn't move on after breaking up with Dasom? Maybe he had done it because he was thankful that someone finally distracted him from dwelling on the past with his ex? When he got a chance he just did it. It felt so natural at that particular moment and he somehow couldn't help it. He couldn't understand why he always did stupid things whenever he was alone with Changkyun. Like for example on that day before the concert, when out of the blue he thought that it was a good idea to stroke the younger boy's hair, just because he suddenly looked so peaceful that the action seemed just right. Every time he recalled that moment he wanted to hide in his bed and never come out again. On that Saturday he had asked Changkyun to meet because he wanted them to become friends. After the concert, he realised that the younger male truly did work hard to be a better musician and suddenly all the prejudice that he had against him at the very beginning didn't matter anymore. That day he really did have a good time with him. He especially enjoyed the time when the younger one showed him his compositions. He learned a lot about hip hop and other things that he had never even thought about. He never heard about all the rappers who were Changkyun's inspiration because it didn't even bother him before but it really was fascinating. Not everything was about Chopin, Bach and Mozart. Kihyun could see that the ginger had a real passion and purpose in his life and it made him realise how wrong he judged him at first. But none of the reasons did explain why he let Changkyun kiss him and most importantly, why he even hugged him after that. Kihyun wasn't the only one surprised by what he did. He realised that he had done something very unexpected when the younger one initially froze in his arms. The pianist had a theory that probably, he just got carried away by all the emotions triggered by the kiss. Why did the kiss make him so vulnerable? Somehow he just couldn't help it when he noticed the way the ginger looked at him and how tenderly he treated him. He wanted to understand himself but he just couldn't. He made so many decisions on the spur of the moment and he was sure that it will get back at him at the most unexpected time. Kihyun could already tell that what he did was wrong because he knew that as a result, he will hurt Changkyun. The younger boy already had feelings for him and he couldn't change it. And the older boy just couldn't like him back because he was straight. He started to wonder whether there was anything that he could do to prevent the ginger from being hurt. He had been thinking about that a lot when he finally made a decision. The sooner he will tell him that he didn't feel the same for him, the better. He just had to find a way how to deliver the message in the most gentle way he could. Kihyun sat in the classroom trying to focus on the movie that the teacher played for them on the interactive whiteboard. They were told that they will be tested on it on the next week but still the senior just couldn't stop thinking how he should explain all of that to Changkyun.  
~*~  
Kihyun decided to do that during the lunch break because he wanted to make everything clear before anything would go wrong. He knew that he would meet Changkyun there because everyone always gathered in the canteen roughly at the same time. The friends with whom he was sitting there could see how nervous he was, but they assumed that he was just stressed out with the amount of work they had. That wouldn't be very weird considering that all of them already had enough of all the deadlines, tests and projects so no one commented on his state. Kihyun was looking around the room every five minutes in order not to miss out the moment when the younger one would enter the canteen. However, when there were only ten minutes of the break left he realised that the ginger may not show up at all. He felt something tighten unpleasantly in his stomach. He didn't even think that he might not come at all because usually, he could see the younger one there. But actually, they didn't have to spend all the lunch breaks in the canteen. The break lasted an hour, so if someone wanted to eat the lunch for example in the nearby shopping centre or wherever they wished, they were free to go. Kihyun compressed his lips and started to poke the food which was on his plate. He had suddenly lost his appetite. Why had Changkyun decided to go somewhere else just on that day when Kihyun wanted to talk with him? He couldn't blame the younger boy for that because he obviously had no idea about the pianist's plans but still, he couldn't hide his disappointment. At that moment he was sure that he would be stressing out about it until he won't tell him.

What was even worse, he didn't see the ginger anywhere in the building on Tuesday as well. He didn't come to the cafeteria, he didn't show up to the orchestra rehearsal and Kihyun had an unpleasant feeling that the younger boy might not show up because of him. Maybe the poor freshman was so overwhelmed by his feelings that he couldn't look Kihyun in the face anymore? As the thought popped up in his mind, the brunette shook his head. No, that was ridiculous. He, of course, knew that the world wasn't revolving around him. There had to be some different reason for that. He hoped that the ginger was ok, even though he was trying to ignore that irrational thought. He knew well that he should just carry on with his life and focus on the more important things but he somehow couldn't. On Wednesday, the younger boy was still absent and now the pianist was seriously concerned. He just couldn't help it anymore. He started to regret that he still didn't have his number or email, even though he wanted to ask him for them ages ago. He absent-mindedly walked down the hallway, completely preoccupied with his thoughts and he was suddenly brought back to the reality when he picked up Changkyun's name in somebody's conversation. He stood a few feet away from the pair of boys, hoping that they won't notice him. He hid behind a corner and on top of that, he didn't see one of the boys' face because he stood behind a pillar so Kihyun hoped that he was safe.  
"Hey, have you heard that Changkyun is sick?" - said a male voice and it was the moment the brunette paid attention to them.  
"Really?" - asked the one whose face Kihyun couldn't see.  
"Yes, and he asked me if I could borrow him my notebook. But as you know, I didn't write anything at all on our last history of culture class." - laughed a tall, brown-haired boy.  
At that moment both the boys burst out laughing loudly.  
"It's so damn boring! Why would I even bother?" - added the brown-haired one gesticulating dramatically.  
"Yoonho, you're a terrible friend! How could you forget to make notes at Changkyun's favourite class! Did you forget Mrs MacDougall is very special for him?" - the boy who stood behind the pillar started to yell but Kihyun could hear in his voice that he was just fooling around.  
"Oh, shoot, you're right. How could I?" - asked the other one ironically.  
"What about psychology though? Maybe you will borrow him those ones?" - the brown-haired boy's friend was seemingly tireless or maybe he just cared about Changkyun a lot.  
"Ha, you wish! As you could expect, I don't have them. Psychology is shit as well." - the tall boy folded his arms and started to walk away.  
"Fuck you, Yoonho! Why do I have to always do everything alone? I highly doubt that you will pass this year. And don't come crying to me in May. You won't see even a half a page of notes!" - now it seemed that this time the other one really was angry.  
At that moment, Kihyun decided that he had heard enough. His heart started to beat faster even though he wanted to think rationally. But still, he couldn't help to worry, after he overheard that the younger boy was sick. He couldn't get rid of the unpleasant feeling. The freshman had been absent for a few days already and it made him nervous. What if he was in a hospital again or something? He recently found out that he had been there a few months ago and what if it recured? He didn't even know what was it before and whether it was serious or not. At that moment he couldn't think properly. Suddenly an idea popped up in his mind so he decided to follow that plan even though it could be stupid. He decided to do that after he would finish all his classes that day, no matter what.

Kihyun made a decision. He didn't have that many classes on Wednesdays and he finished them at 4 pm so he knew that he could do it because that hour was just right. It wasn't too early not too late. And besides that, it was already February so the days started to be a bit longer than they used to be during the previous months. Maybe it was a dumb idea but he just had to be sure. The worries kept haunting him and he had to do something about that or else he would go crazy. He had to check on on Changkyun. He wanted to visit him to see how the younger one felt. And it might not have been the best idea since he had no guarantee that the freshman will be home. There always was the possibility that he was at the hospital but Kihyun really prefers not to think about that. After the classes, he just got into his car and instead of going straight home he just decided to drive to the younger boy's flat. He was there just a few days before so it just couldn't be hard, right? At that point, he started regretting that he didn't even check where the place was on a map because the previous time when he went there, Changkyun himself was his navigation. He cursed under his breath as he reached the city centre because he suddenly forgot where he should turn next. He turned to the left and after a few miles, he realised that it wasn't the right path. Kihyun kept trying out different routes for about half an hour when he started to think that it was maybe better to just give up. He wanted to go back when a sudden realisation came to him. Even though he was a bit unsure, he turned into that road and suddenly everything started to make sense. He drove for around 15 minutes when he saw a familiar tall block of flats. He sighed with relief and parked his car. When he stopped the engine he realised that his heart was beating unusually fast. He could tell that he was nervous but he wasn't quite sure why. He suddenly imagined how it could all be way easier if he had Changkyun's phone number. He could have just called him to ask what had happened to him but apparently, nothing could be easy for Kihyun. He sighed deeply and decided to enter the building. He climbed the stairs until he reached Changkyun's flat's door and he stopped before them. He touched his chest because he could feel his heartbeat go crazy. Why if the ginger wasn't at home and he was just making a fool of himself? He took a few deep breaths before he finally decided to ring the doorbell. He waited for a few seconds when he finally heard some shuffling on the other side of the wall and after the footsteps stopped the door opened abruptly. When Kihyun looked inside he froze. Oh, my God. Did he just go to a different flat? He quickly looked around the hallway and he could swear that everything was the same as he remembered it from a few days before. He even counted the number of floors so he just had to be in the right place. In the threshold really did stand a young man but it wasn't Changkyun. It was just some random boy who Kihyun had never seen before. He had brown hair, big eyes and slightly protruding ears. The guy could have been roughly Changkyun's age. Who the hell was he? Kihyun's mouth went dry but he still had to talk before the stranger would slam the door.  
"Hi, I'm Yoo Kihyun and is Im Changkyun home?" - he asked feeling a bit weird.  
He knew that the freshman had no flatmates.  
"Sorry, if it's the wrong flat of something." - he added quickly and laughed awkwardly because the boy just stared at him with a bored expression.  
"Why do you want to see him?" - asked the brown-haired one still looking exactly as bored.  
Kihyun gulped.  
"I wanted to tell him something important." - he replied hoping that this dude won't ask any more questions.  
The boy frowned.  
"I'm sorry but he's sick. Write him a message or something." - he said flatly and started to close the door.  
Just before it closed he heard Changkyun's voice.  
"Seokwon, what's going on? Who's that?" - he heard him call from the inside of the flat.  
After that, the brunette heard a few footsteps and the brown-haired guy apparently walked away from the door.  
"That's that pianist, Kihyun. What the hell does he want from you in such a situation? Haven't you told me that you both hate each other?" - he was whispering but the senior could still hear his words.  
He felt sick to his stomach. That was untrue. He didn't hate Changkyun anymore. That was the past.  
"Let him in." - replied Changkyun.  
Kihyun gasped. Maybe he will manage to talk to him. He was already very stressed out because he started to believe that he had come here in vain.  
"B-but you're sick. Are you sure that you want to deal with him?" - protested the other boy.  
"Seokwon, you're already here. I'll manage somehow. I want to see him." - Changkyun spoke again and the pianist could hear that his voice was a bit hoarse.  
"Ok, as you want." - grumbled the brown-haired boy and after a few seconds the door opened again - "Ok, come in, Kihyun." - he said to him and the brunette twisted his face because there was something about this Seokwon that he didn't like.  
Kihyun walked inside and the flat was so small that from the threshold he could see that Changkyun was laying on the sofa. The senior took his shoes off and ignoring the other dude he walked up to the ginger. As the younger boy noticed him his expression softened. He was lying under layers of blankets and his hair was messy and sticking in all directions. He was sick for sure but Kihyun felt embarrassed because he had thought that it was a completely different type of illness.  
"What happened?" - asked the ginger in a bit scared tone and he obviously had a sore throat or something because his voice was noticeably hoarse.  
"I-I..." - he stuttered out not knowing how to start.  
The brown-haired boy's eyes were drilling a hole in his back and he really didn't want to talk about that with some random dude in the same room. He came here to make sure what happened to Changkyun and the only different thing he wanted to talk about was the letter but he really couldn't do that when there was someone else. He gulped because he felt uncomfortable.  
"Seokwon, it's almost 6." - said the ginger out of the blue - "Didn't you just tell me that your last bus today leaves at 6.30?"  
The other boy sent him a glare.  
"Are you just trying to get rid of me?" - he ground out.  
Kihyun couldn't quite get why the brown-haired one was so possessive of the freshman. There was something about him that gave him a headache. He wanted him to leave as soon as possible.  
"No, I'm just worried that you'll be late. You know that I want you to get home safely." - replied the ginger unexpectantly calmly.  
The brunette could guess that the other guy suspected well. Changkyun really did try to get rid of him but he just played dumb. The brown-haired boy sighed loudly.  
"Ok, I'm leaving." - he said in low voice and it was obvious that he was sulking.  
He started to get dressed and after a few long minutes, the door finally slammed. It felt like an eternity for Kihyun. After a couple more awkward and silent minutes Changkyun finally spoke.  
"So why are you here? I'd never expected that you would come."  
The brunette felt a sudden wave of panic. Oh my God, he really had to seem like some kind of weirdo for doing something like that without any strong reason. He should've just asked about the phone number before but it just didn't seem like a right thing to do when they still disliked each other.  
"How do you feel? Were you in a hospital?" - he didn't want to be so direct but those sentences were the only ones that he managed to utter after his brain started to work again.  
Changkyun's face went blank.  
"No, I wasn't. That's just a strong cold and I don't feel very well but I'm not dying or anything." - the boy chuckled but after that, his face twisted a bit and he coughed.  
He wanted to reply with something funny but he just couldn't so he only just stood stiffly not knowing how to react. After the meaning of the younger boy's words clicked in his mind he sighed with relief. Oh, God, he was really dumb. Which normal, sane person would go to someone's house uninvited just to check on them. He started to believe that there was something very wrong with him. Suddenly he felt something hot touch his hand and it was Changkyun's fingers. He gulped and his heart skipped a beat. The reaction was weird but he just couldn't help it. He looked down at the younger boy's hand. What a sly fox. He always somehow managed to initiate some kind of physical contact whether Kihyun wanted that or not. And to his own surprise, he just couldn't find any courage to say something about that. He felt Changkyun's grip tighten on his hand but he was still thunderstruck.  
"I'm happy that you're ok." - said the older male finally and he immediately regretted that.  
It sounded so stupid that he wanted to slap himself. He had to get down to business before he would make even a bigger fool out of himself.  
"I got your card." - he said in low voice and Changkyun's eyes widened.  
He breathed in loudly and it was obvious that he was almost as nervous as Kihyun.  
"Did you know that it almost broke my locker? This damn university mail is totally useless." - he blurted out and the ginger stared.  
He apparently didn't expect this words. What a surprise.  
"Sorry." - whispered the brunette quickly and lowered his eyes and after he managed to think how to put it he continued - "I really appreciate that you had written that for me and I get what you feel but..." - his heart was beating madly.  
He almost couldn't remember the last time he had to deal with something like that.  
"B-But... I don't really know what I feel myself. And I feel so bad for not being able to reply to you in a way that would make everything clear." - he still stared at his shoes.  
Previously, he wanted to simply tell him "sorry, just forget about me" but firstly, he was a pussy and secondly, he really started to get confused with his own emotions. It wasn't so simple anymore.  
"I'm straight and I know that you like me and I didn't want to hurt you but I just can't give you a simple answer."  
With every word, he felt more and more stupid. He was so overwhelmed with stress that he forgot that Changkyun was still holding his hand until the younger male didn't loosen his grip. The ginger let out a long sigh.  
"Don't worry. I don't need a definite answer now and there. I don't want to torture you or anything. I know that it can be hard to figure everything out." - he said in a calm voice and Kihyun looked up at him.  
He couldn't believe that the young male could be so mature at times.  
"I don't care if you're straight, bi or a frog. I really do like you and I know that it'd only be a problem if you told me that it's definitely not gonna happen. Then I'd somehow try to understand your decision even if it would hurt." - the ginger continued to speak and Kihyun couldn't believe his own ears.  
He felt like on a rollercoaster. He was sure that one single person couldn't feel so many emotions at the same time but yet he did. He was speechless so he just stood still, his face pale. There was a long pause but weirdly enough, it wasn't really awkward.  
"Um, I have only a one, maybe a bit stupid, question. Who was the dude who just left your flat?" - he asked finally because the thought niggled him.  
Changkyun snorted.  
"Oh, him... He's my classmate. He came here to give me the notes from our classes." - he replied with a smirk creeping on his lips.  
Kihyun compressed his lips. He started to regret that question. Why did he want to know that in the first place? Why couldn't he just guess that it was his classmate? Now that he knew that he realised that it had to be the guy who was standing behind the pillar when he spied on those two boys.  
"Er, I'm sorry for that." - he replied quickly.  
Oh God, he just wanted to disappear.  
"I gotta leave." - he added and as he said so he could swear that he saw the disappointment on the younger boy's face.  
He started to walk in the direction of the door but he stopped abruptly.  
"One more thing. Can I have your number?"  
He could hear Changkyun choke.  
"What?" - he asked in a muffled voice after he managed to stop coughing - "E-er... S-sure." - he stuttered out - "We should've done that a long time ago already."  
"Yes, you're right. As you can see I just could have called you instead of coming here if I had your number." - after he said that they both laughed and he immediately regretted that because the ginger started coughing again.


	10. Of Secret Messages and Facebook

Ok, I'm so done ._.  
I'm kinda new to this website and I don't know how to edit the text here for sh*t :-/ This chapter had a few pics and when I tried to post the chapter here I always had some problems so I just decided to post a link to a pdf. (Unfortunately, I have used some emojis and they don't work in the pdf as well so please bear with that somehow). I hope that everything works and that you don't mind it. The next chapter will be posted traditionally for sure because it doesn't require so much editing so don't worry.

 

But unfortunately, I was planning to write Changki three-shot after this story which was supposed to have a lot of pics but it seems that I won't be able to do that here :-( so I will only post it on AFF

 

<https://drive.google.com/open?id=1ePBF8xJgp4Jtes334WgeeYkAlM-Kw2ns>


	11. Author's note: not an update [to be deleted later]

Hi, it's the author here

I just wanted to let you know that I'm alive and I wasn't kidnapped by the aliens or something. I'm just extremely busy because it's the end of the semester now and also I'm having exams in 3 weeks time. That's also why I wanted to finish the story before the 1st of January but as you can see I unfortunately didn't manage. And apparently all my teachers live to the idea that "Oh they're having exams in there's weeks... Let's give them twice as much homework, new projects to prepare and let's make tests everyday. What bad can happen... " (But seriously I get that they just have to give us marks for the semester so yeah)

And I just wanted to tell you that and I hope that you'll be patient waiting for the last chapter and the epilogue. I'm having one exam on the 2nd of February and the next one on the 6th and then I'm going to have short holidays so if everything goes well (and I hope that it will) and I won't have any retakes then I'll post the last chapter shortly after that. Actually, probably even if I fail I think that I'll have some time to wrote because I won't be doing anything else that studying for those two exams, so yeah...

So until those exams I'm going on a semi hiatus and also I'm sorry for not telling you that earlier. And sorry for all the comments that I haven't been replying to; I haven't forgotten about you I was just busy.

Judging on my plan for the last chapter it probably will be quite long (something in-between 7  and 10k) so hope that it will be worth waiting 


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